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Finding Better Ways: A Guide To Becoming An Indispensable Leader With Darby Vannier

BYW S4 16 | Indispensable Leader

 

There are always better ways to do things. As a leader, you are the ultimate innovator, the indispensable leader. You have the desire to share your thoughts with everyone in the workplace, despite generational differences. And most importantly, you follow your core values because those values create a better culture. In this episode, Darby Vannier joins Dr. Gary Sanchez to talk about his WHY of Better Way through his book, The Indispensable Leader. Darby has over 20 years of experience in leadership development and strategic consulting. He is also the Director of Operations & Technology at Leadership Resources. Learn more about his book and how to properly run an organization. Go beyond your ways and become an indispensable leader!

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Finding Better Ways: A Guide To Becoming An Indispensable Leader With Darby Vannier

We are going to be talking about the why of a better way. If this is your why then you are the ultimate innovator. You are constantly seeking better ways to do everything. You find yourself wanting to improve virtually anything by finding a way to make it better. You also desire to share your improvement with the world. You constantly ask yourself questions like, “What if we tried this differently? What if we did this another way? How can we make this better?”

You contribute to the world with better processes and systems while operating under the motto, “I’m often pleased, but never satisfied.” You are excellent at associating, which means that you are adept at taking ideas or systems from one industry or discipline and applying them to another, always with the ultimate goal of improving something.

In this episode, I’ve got a great guest for you. His name is Darby Vannier. He has many years of experience in leadership development and strategic consulting. He has led effective teams of more than 100 employees, coached others into their own leadership positions, and created stability during challenging organizational transitions. Darby built his career on the philosophy that developing the right people is the key to success. Darby, welcome to the show.

Thanks a lot, Gary. It’s great to be here. I appreciate you having me on.

Leadership sounds like it’s your thing. That’s where you’ve spent your time.

I wrote the book on it.

Let’s go back to your life. Take us back through where you were born, where you grew up, what you were like in high school, and how you got on this leadership path.

It’s an interesting story. From young age, I was born in a small town in Nebraska. When I say small, it’s so small. I read several of your episodes, and you had JB Owen on. She said, “Small town of 70,000.” I was like, “That’s not very small.” I was born in a small town in Nebraska and had a great childhood. At about 1st or 2nd grade, it was the mid-80’s and the economy was bad. My father and grandfather owned a Ford dealership, and people stopped paying their bills because they didn’t have any income. It affected the dealership.

I can tell you exactly where we were, what we were eating, and what we were driving when my parents said, “We’re going to have to move. The Ford dealership is going to close. We’re going to get in the car and drive West until your dad finds a job. That’s where we’re going to end up.” We ended up in Longmont, Colorado. We were not there very long, and we made our way back to Nebraska. That set off a series of moves 5 times in 6 years at one point.

[bctt tweet=”Leadership is the ability to influence others towards an overarching vision.” username=”whyinstitute”]

I got to the point as a kid where I was like, “This is not worth trying to make friends.” I shut down. I remember starting in school, standing outside the classroom with the teacher and my parents trying to convince me to go in. I’m like, “I’m not doing it again.” I tell you that because whether this would have happened or not, it caused me to be an introverted person. I continue to be to this day, although there’s a broad spectrum of introverted people. I love standing in front of people and speaking, and a lot of introverts don’t.

What that meant is I got good at being self-reliant, planning things, and understanding how I was going to make things happen. When I came into college, I was the one that wanted to be in charge of every group project because I wanted it to be organized, who was doing what, that everything got done, and I could check all the boxes and everything. At a certain point, somebody asked me to participate in our residence hall council. They needed some assistance in getting funding from the student senate from our university.

I agreed to do that, and that’s where I took off from a leadership standpoint. That was a turning point because, from that time in college, they helped start 3 or 4 new campus organizations and served as president of those. From that time on all the way into my career since then, leadership has been a thing and that feeling. Going through your process in understanding the better way made total sense with that part of my life, career, and everything.

You are always in search of a better way. Where did you go to college?

I went to a small college here in Lincoln, Nebraska, called Nebraska Wesleyan University. I’ve got my Master’s online from the University of Phoenix. I was working in retail, so I was like, “I’ve got to have a creative way to do this because I don’t have set hours with what I’m doing.” The online thing worked great for me.

What was your career path initially? What did you do right out of school?

I had a pretty diverse set of circumstances throughout my career. Right out of college, I started managing at a 22-screen AMC movie theater. I was one of 6 or 7 managers at this huge movie theater. That’s how I started my career. I took over. Everybody does operations manager in a theater that size, but then you also have a specialty area. I became the HR manager and training manager, so I did all the hiring and training of all of our people.

From there, I moved further into the retail setting. I took over as a store manager of Kinko’s, which is now the FedEx office. It was quite an experience because, at that time, all the Kinkos were still 24 hours. Managing a 24-hour retail store was interesting because you work hours, go home, have dinner, and then you would get a phone call. Your overnight person was calling in sick. You have to go back and work all night then too.

I did that for years and got to the point where I’m like, “These hours are wearing on me. I’m tired of the retail setting.” I went into the nonprofit world and took over managing National Livestock Association. I did that for about eleven years and took that organization through a variety of challenges. It had a lot of challenges from the very start. It worked well for my personality because I’m good at solving problems. I took that organization, grew it, merged with another national organization.

BYW S4 16 | Indispensable Leader
Indispensable Leader: Don’t try to exist on one end or the other between manager and leader. View it more like a Venn diagram where you’re picking the best characteristics from both to become an indispensable leader.

 

It went through that whole merger process. I got to a point where I was like, “I’m ready to be done reporting to boards.” I got new bosses every single year as new board members came in. Eleven years of that was a long time. I moved into my role, which is with a leadership development company. We do leadership coaching, leadership training, and strategic planning for companies. That fits well for me, especially being on the operation side and being able to help the organization from that standpoint.

Why did you decide to go into leadership development?

I don’t know that I ever made a decision early on in my career to do that, but leadership has always been a big part of everywhere that I was. Even when I was at Kinko’s, while I was a store manager, I did leadership-based training for our district and our region. I participated in a lot of CEO groups within that organization. It has always been an important part of me.

On the people side, I tend to build strong relationships with my team members. I spend a lot of time on the hiring process to get those individuals in, and then I try to coach them along because that is important. When this opportunity came up to go to a company specializing in that, it seemed a perfect fit. That’s how I ended up doing that.

You wrote a book on leadership. What’s the title of your book?

It’s called the Indispensable Leader.

Why did you title it that way?

The whole premise of the book is this idea. You’ve heard people say, “Are you a manager? Are you a leader?” I start out the book by saying, “I think that’s the wrong question.” I know a lot of great managers who are also good leaders. By asking the question, “Are you one or the other?” It means you can’t be both. I don’t think that’s right.

I said, “Look at it like you have both manager and visionary characteristics.” You have those manager characteristics that are highly organized and process-oriented. They are the people who are asking about what we’re going to do and how we’re going to do it, and then you have the visionary side where you have those folks who are high visionary, lots of ideas. Those are the folks who are explaining why we’re going to do it. They’re highly passionate.

[bctt tweet=”Leaders are made, not born.” username=”whyinstitute”]

The premise of the book is you should try to become an indispensable leader. What that means is rather than trying to exist on one end or the other of that spectrum between manager and visionary, which you don’t want to be on the far end of either side. View it more a Venn diagram where you are taking the manager and leader characteristics, overlaying them, and picking the best traits of both to create yourself into this indispensable leader position. That serves you well. The book takes you through that. I use a lot of personal stories from throughout my life that illustrate various things and characteristics that are important, both from a positive and a negative side. I talked through those things as well.

How do you define leadership?

That’s difficult because everybody views it a little bit differently. In one form or another, it’s the ability to be able to influence others towards a vision. You have to be able to convey what the vision is. That might be some overarching vision, or that might be some, “We have this project to complete. This is what it’s going to look in the end.” You have to rally people behind some vision in order to accomplish some task or overarching vision.

That’s the whole essence of leadership. There’s a lot that goes into it because you have to build a lot of relationships, deal with interpersonal things between team members, and coach people along. Depending on what the task is or what you are trying to accomplish, those can be easy things or very complex things that take a long period of time to accomplish.

What is it that makes a great leader?

There are a lot of things, but a few of the specific things that I talk about in my book, one of them is great leaders are people who are curious. They want to constantly be learning. They know they don’t have all the right answers. That’s one thing when I hire people, I always say, “I’m not trying to hire a cookie cutter of Darby because we already have a Darby, and that’s plenty. I need people who can fill the areas that I know I have less skill in.” I’m looking for people to fill those gaps. How you know that is by constantly learning and thinking about what you know and trying to stay curious about things.

A great leader understands that not everything’s going to be easy. I’ve had a lot of setbacks in my career, and I talk about some of them in my book. You don’t let them sink you. You hear that a lot when you talk about people who are entrepreneurs, but that applies to just general leadership. It happens. You are dealing with people and situations. There are going to be setbacks. You have to view those as challenges and opportunities, things that only add to your experience.

When I look back at some of the challenges I’ve had, I can see how they helped me in my career. It didn’t feel great at the time, but it was beneficial in the long run. A couple of other things is that great leaders listen. They listen to understand. They don’t just listen to respond. What I mean by that is you have sometimes had people where you are talking to them, and you can tell they are trying to think in their head and know what they want to say. That’s all they’re thinking about is how they’re going to respond to you. They don’t hear what you say. You have to listen so you can understand. One of my mentors told me this at one point, and it made total sense. Spend your time listening, and when it comes time to act, you have to be able to act. You have to make the decision. That’s why you are in your role, so make the decision and move forward.

The last thing is great leaders are kind. I tell people, “Be kind.” Everybody has their own stuff going on. If you think about the team members on your team and everything they have going on, you are not going to know everything going on in their lives. They’re going to make mistakes. They’re going to have days when they get upset and say something stupid to you that they probably should not say to their boss or manager. You have to understand that everybody has stuff. You have stuff in your life that will help you as a leader. There are certainly a lot more than that, but those are some of the main things that I talk about when I coach individuals.

Do you think that being a great leader is something in you, or is it something you can learn?

BYW S4 16 | Indispensable Leader
Indispensable Leader: Great leaders listen to understand, not just to respond. Some leaders just think about how they will respond to you, so they don’t hear what you’re saying.

 

I talk about this in the book. I am a firm believer that leaders are made and not born because I’m a perfect example. I gave you that story of being an introvert. I would never have imagined that I would ever lead people until that point in college, where it shifted. That was all because of my experiences in college and the opportunities I was given.

It had nothing to do with how I was born. There are people who are born who may be more charismatic. Those things help, but that doesn’t mean they’re going to be a great leader. You can have a highly charismatic person who is not a great leader. I’m a firm believer that leaders are made and not born.

Has leadership style or teaching changed over the last years?

It has changed over some years, but it’s changed over many years if you go back further. It’s because the economy in the United States itself changes. That means that things are going to shift. We certainly have a much different workforce now than a few years ago, with challenges with hiring and folks moving on more quickly. Those create different leadership challenges that force you to adapt as time goes on.

Now, things are less dictatorial than in my father’s age, where you had a boss, and the boss said, “Do this,” and you did it. That doesn’t work as well nowadays. In some industries, that still happens, and it’s necessary. Within the military, you follow orders. That is much different. Out in the world and industry, it’s become a much softer approach where you have much more open communication and dialogue.

There is a need to have much more explanation to your team members as to why something is important. Not just, “Do this. You don’t need to know why.” They need to know why because you want them behind your product and business. You want to have that culture built because otherwise, you are not going to be successful, especially nowadays when you want to retain good employees. You’ve got to have a great culture. That means they have to understand what the company is trying to achieve and represent.

I’m going to throw a scenario at you. You’ve got a business where the team is made up of five generations now. You’ve got the Baby Boomers, Gen X, Gen Z, and Millennials. It’s challenging to lead different generations because they think differently. How do you do that? As a leader is in their 50s, trying to connect, not be dictatorial, and have a softer approach, how do you do that with so many different generations and now particularly more women than ever?

I got asked a couple of years ago to come and speak on the topic of generational differences. One of the points I made is this is not something new. They said, “Come talk to us about managing Millennials.” I said, “I don’t want to do that. Millennials get a bad rap, but I will come and talk to you about managing multiple generations.” One of the things that I said, and the whole point of my whole talk was, “This is not any different than it has ever been. There have always been new generations coming into the workforce and other generations slowly exiting.”

There has always been this mix of people. It’s different now based on the technology, products we do, and the service-based economy we live in. What it comes down to is you have to understand, in particular, learning and communication styles. This isn’t based on generational. This can be the same generation. If you think about even within one generation, individuals on your team, some people learn better by reading, hearing something, some people need to be shown. You have to take all those things into account.

[bctt tweet=”True core values come from what your culture really supports.” username=”whyinstitute”]

I spend a lot of time with people I coach, talking through some of those things and saying, “You need to understand and adapt to all of these. You may have a preference, but you have to understand that you are working with other individuals who have a different method of learning or communicating.” What that means is if you are dealing with a situation where you have a Boomer and a Millennial or Gen Z, those are two different types of personalities, but that doesn’t mean they can’t coexist.

That Gen Z or Millennial has to understand that when they want to talk with the Boomer, they need to either pick up a phone and talk to them or they had to walk to their office, make an appointment, sit down and talk to them. At the same time, the Boomer needs to understand that sometimes that Gen Z or Millennial doesn’t have time or want to have a face-to-face conversation all the time. They may need to send them an email or a text message nowadays.

It means that everybody has to be adaptable no matter what their generation is. Generation X is the most adaptable, and I’m in the X Generation. We are a bridge between multiple generations because of the timeframe we grew up in. That has happened throughout history. Even if you go back before the Boomers or back to the greatest generation during the World Wars, you have the transition taking place back then as well.

When I did the research for this talk, I went back and looked at different research and different articles written at the time. Every generation says the same things about the next generation. You had the greatest generation saying about the Boomers that they’re hippies and don’t care. Nowadays, you see the same thing. People say those things about Millennials. They don’t care about anything. They’re not loyal. In reality, it has been the same all throughout history.

Here’s a challenge in that same scenario that I was telling you about. This leader, the CEO, tried to be adaptable. He tried to handle all the different ages, scenarios, drama, and all the stuff that comes with each one. It ended up being a mess because nobody was happy. Everybody was trying to do everything their own way, and it didn’t work well. He started losing people, and morale was down. I keep hearing that that’s the way to go, but I don’t necessarily ever see it work. I’m curious if you see an example out there that you can think of that has worked. In theory, I get what you are saying, but in actuality, I’ve never seen it work well. Maybe you have some examples of that.

The places that I’ve seen it be successful is when people don’t focus so much on the generational differences but look at the similarities. They also focus on the company culture itself. What does the company believe, and how do people of all ages and genders affect them and get engaged in that culture? That is a challenge. It takes a lot to build a culture, and it takes a lot to change it if you have a culture that you are not happy with.

Here is the thing about culture. A lot of companies have core values and think that’s what they build their culture around. We have these core values and put them on the wall. We’re trustworthy and have a high amount of respect. The problem is that those are not true core values. True core values are what is it that your culture supports. What is it your people believe? How do they act on a day-to-day basis? If you look at that and determine what those things are, and they’re not what you imagine or want them to be, then you have to slowly start making a shift. It takes a concerted effort.

In the company I’m in, we altered our core values a number of years ago. We were not having a major issue, but we decided it was time to go back and reevaluate them. We spent a lot of time talking with all of the team members and understanding where people were. We adjusted them. You could do that, and then you could hang them on the wall and say, “These are our core values.” It doesn’t work, and it doesn’t help the culture.

It took our leadership team constantly talking about them. When an issue came up, when something good happened, we would say, “How does this relate to the core values?” We would constantly ask those questions. In team meetings, we would ask individuals, “How did you see your team members over the last week? Use our core values.” We’ve done that now consistently for the last couple of years. It took a long time, but eventually, that became so ingrained in our culture that we used those core values. Everybody believes them and onboard with them. We use them to hire and use them to make decisions on firing, and as we do coaching, we use them with our clients. Focusing on it from that aspect instead of the generational differences is where I’ve seen the most success happen with companies.

BYW S4 16 | Indispensable Leader
Indispensable Leader: As a leader, keep learning because change is going to happen. You have to be highly adaptable. So make sure that you’re constantly curious about trying new things.

 

What are the core values of your company? Give us an example of what you were talking about how something connects to those core values so we can put this into practice.

They are, “Better together, continuous development, authenticity, get things done, and love what we do.” All of those five things are what we focus on. When we come into a team meeting, you hear a lot of times where team members will reference other team members for better together. They’ll say, “I talked to so-and-so and needed help on this with this client. We were having this issue. They stepped up and helped me out.” Those are great examples.

The authenticity piece is a great core value because we use that with team members. Are you truly being authentic? That doesn’t mean being trust trustworthy. It doesn’t mean being honest because you can be honest with somebody and not be authentic. What authentic means is that you don’t hold something back even by saying the unsaid thing. I can tell you something that is true, but if I hold something back, you don’t get the whole story.

We use authenticity within our team. It’s also a great core value with our clients because sometimes we have to use them, especially coaching somebody. Sometimes we have to say, “One of our core values is authenticity. I’m going to be upfront with you here on this.” You give them some honest feedback. Sometimes you’ll be authentic because you screwed up. For example, we billed somebody wrong. You call them up and say, “One of our core values is authenticity. We want to be upfront. We messed up, and we billed you wrong. Here’s the situation. We want to make it right and work through it with you.” That’s what I mean. You have to ingrain those things in everything you do every single day.

Let’s talk for a minute about culture. Everybody talks about culture. You’ve got to have a great culture. What the heck is culture?

I’m not sure I have a great definition for it. It is a buzzword. You hear it a lot. When we focus on culture, we tend to focus on identifying your true core values and what your beliefs are. That’s truly what the underlying piece of your culture is on how you live. When you do the work and get into it, you may find that you have a negative culture or a culture that you don’t want. That takes quite a bit to shift. It may mean a total shift in how you lead, or it may mean that what will happen is you are going to realize certain team members are not the right people in the right seats, or they don’t belong in your organization at all, or they may realize that.

As you start to shift the culture, if they were adept at the old culture and were happy with having the negative culture, they will eventually figure out that they will not fit in the new organization. Those core values will lend themselves to help you build that base which is the basic underlying piece of what culture is in every organization. It gets a lot harder in large organizations because you have so many levels as you get bigger. Sometimes you have to take that down to a department and what that looks like within a department or location.

I was at an event, and the gentleman that was speaking had built a very large plumbing company from nothing. He talked about the origin of his business with his wife. Now they’ve got a few hundred employees. He has done well. He built it all on culture and invested quite a bit into his people, which you don’t see in that industry that people do.

He said it took him 30 years to build an amazing culture and 3 months to destroy it by stepping away and bringing in a new leader, and then it took him another 2 years to get back what he had before. I asked him, “What was the difference between the great and bad cultures?” He said, “It was leadership. It’s the leader that brings the culture, which then makes things better.” Culture has always been that hard thing. Everybody says culture eats strategy for breakfast, but how do you build a culture? You are saying, identify your core values and beliefs. What do you do with them from there to build that culture?

[bctt tweet=”There’s no silver bullet to building a good culture. It takes a lot of time and effort.” username=”whyinstitute”]

You have to use them. We took our new core values when we did those years ago and designed our entire hiring process around them. We don’t do the old-style employee reviews, but we do quarterly one-on-ones with our team members. We built that process around the core values. In each of those meetings, we talk through the core values and say, “How do you think you are doing on this one?” I would say to them, “I agree with you,” or I would say, “I disagree. I don’t think you are doing as well on this one. Here’s what I mean.”

It’s not meant to be a punishment. It’s meant to help both of us. Maybe you’ve heard of the author, Gino Wickman, and the traction process. That’s what they do. They have a thing called the People Analyzer meeting. They do a plus-minus on core values. That’s what I’m getting at. You use those core values in everything you do, and it takes a long time.

The gentleman you talked about took 30 years to get it right. You are constantly trying to evolve that. That is true. It does not take very long to ruin it. We’ve seen it with our clients a number of times. We were working with a CEO that was highly engaged in developing their people, and they were working with us to help them do that. They exited, or in a lot of cases, they retire, and another person comes in, and that person doesn’t care as much. They’re a little bit more dictatorial. They want the stuff to get done. The culture takes a nosedive.

We have seen the same scenario where the original person was brought back in and had to fix everything again. There’s not a silver bullet to building a good culture. It takes a lot of work and time. When I approach leaders, they always want to have, “What’s the easy button for that?” There is not an easy button for that one. It takes a lot of effort.

Leadership is not easy, that is for sure. I spent a year in this leadership course, knowing that being a dentist for 32 years does not qualify me to lead a global company. I wish it did. I don’t know what qualifies somebody to be a good leader. What do you think?

It comes with a certain number of traits and some of those things that I talked about in making sure that it’s somebody who wants to constantly learn, evolve, and adapt to change easily so that they can be successful over time. Somebody who is s understanding and understands they don’t have the answers to everything and are not always right. I stated that I try to hire the right people. I’ve coached employees throughout my career where I’ve had folks who were hesitant to give you their opinion.

I’m like, “You need to tell me. I hired you for this reason. Argue with me, tell me why I’m wrong. I want you to tell me why I’m wrong. We are going to get to a point where I will have to make a decision, and we’ll move on, but tell me why I’m wrong right now.” That’s a great characteristic for a leader because that means that they’re open to learning and trying new things. That means that they’re going to be good listeners. They have to be understanding. I come back to those core things as things that are good for leaders.

I’m curious if we’re going to find in the future that the soft style leadership, listening to everybody’s needs, trying to be there for everyone and understand everybody, and emotional intelligence. I wonder if we’re going to find out that that’s dead wrong and that dictatorial is where we need to be. It seems like there’s a swing back and forth. Now we’re saying, “Dictatorial work. You need to be there and present and listen,” and all the stuff that we talked about. I wonder if that’s going to end up being a better leader than someone who goes in and says, “This is what we’ve got to get done. Let’s go do it, suck it up, quit crying, and let’s go.”

The most successful situations are going to be the ones that have a combination of the two. It was what I was saying where you have to listen, but you have to make a decision and move forward at a certain point. With my better way of personality, I want to get stuff done. We are going to find a better way to do it, and then we’re going to do it.

“I don’t feel like it right now. I’m sorry, Darby. I’m not emotionally here for that.”

BYW S4 16 | Indispensable Leader
The Indispensable Leader: How to Use Your Inner Manager and Visionary to Achieve Leadership Success

I am a very open leader, but I don’t have the patience for that level of attitude. We would have to have conversations about that. You are right. There will be shifts back and forth. It also depends a lot on the labor market because the company has struggled to find people nowadays. Eventually, it will shift again, and there will be high unemployment. There will be people that are looking for jobs.

If you got companies who are like, “I can go out and hire five people today.” It makes it a lot easier for them to say, “Do your job. I don’t want to talk about it.” There are shifts, but ultimately, I believe that having the combination of the two things. You’ve got to have it at a certain point, and then you’ve got to act and get stuff done because that’s how we make our money as a company. That is where you are going to see the most success. That has been the case throughout time.

The situation I gave you with the gentleman who went down the path of trying to be soft, understands everybody, listens to everybody’s needs, tries to meet everybody’s needs, and creates his organization based on that has become quite disillusioned. He’s like, “Screw this. I’m only hiring people here who want to work and contribute. Leave your stuff at home, come here, and let’s go accomplish something and we’ll see how that goes.” I’m watching it to see he’s swinging the pendulum in the other direction in a matter of months. We’ll see if that ends up being a more successful path for him.

That is the same situation. I don’t have time for what you described at the beginning of that either. It’s all about making sure you have that hiring process. I want my people and leaders to be open and understanding and have those things, but we have to get the stuff done. That is the priority. If you can’t do both, then it’s not going to work out. We are going to have to find somebody else, and you’ll move on to where you want to move on to. If you want to come and do a certain activity all time, there are jobs out there for you. Doing what I do in my company is not where you need to be now.

The last question I have for you is, what is the best piece of advice that you have ever been given or you’ve ever given?

It’s the same for both because it’s things that I’ve heard from mentors over time, but it comes back to some of those things that I already said. One of the biggest things is to keep learning because change is going to happen, and we have to be adaptable, especially as leaders. Make sure that you are constantly curious about trying new things. The other thing is something that comes up all the time when I coach people. It gets back to the easy button thing. Understand there are going to be setbacks. This is not easy. Leading people and organizations is difficult. If you are an entrepreneur, starting a company is difficult. It’s hard. There are going to be challenges.

Use those as opportunities, step up to the plate, accomplish what you need to accomplish, and then look back at everything you learned. I was part of a group in early 2020. The group that we were meeting was local business leaders. I say local because we had people in multiple states that were getting together to talk about how we could support each other through the challenges that had arisen. A lot of people had business challenges very early on in the process.

I remember one of the things that I said to the group, I’m like, “Imagine what we will learn this year. Imagine a year from now, when we look back, what we will have learned.” It was interesting because we had some restaurants that were in that group. The restaurant industry is perfect. Look at that entire shift that they made. They had takeout before, but suddenly you saw curbside, more takeout, bigger takeout windows, and places that were popping up that were takeout only. Imagine adapting to that.

My church is a great example. We have a pretty big church, so we had a video recording that went on the local cable station already, but we didn’t stream. We have the capability to, but we never did. We switched to streaming overnight. We learned how to do it well and put the words up to the songs on the bottom. All the stuff that we learned is a great example for leaders because you have to be able to adapt and learn throughout time. That gets to that other piece where not everything is going to go how you think it’s going to go. Stuff comes up.

How did it feel for you when your why came up as a better way?

I didn’t know what it meant until I read everything. As I read it, the vast majority of everything made total sense. I’m constantly looking for a better way to do things. You’ll hear a lot of the word efficiency. You hear me say a lot, “How can we make this more efficient?” You hear the word scalable like, “Is this process going to be scalable? That’s great for us as a $4 million company. Is it going to work for us as a $7 million or a $10 million company?” I use those words a lot. Also, looking through the stuff with building processes and everything, I’m very big on that. If we can create a process to make it more efficient and scalable, let’s do that. It pretty much made total sense.

[bctt tweet=”Understand that there are going to be setbacks in everything you do.” username=”whyinstitute”]

My why is a better way as well. I resonate with everything you are saying because that’s the same process I’m going through in my head. Our wheels are clicking together.

We have to be careful because those wheels start as soon as I hear an idea. I work with a very high visionary person, and I’m right in the middle, if you’d look at it as a spectrum, maybe a little bit on the visionary side. I have a lot of manager characteristics. I work with a very high visionary. He comes up with a lot of ideas, and I have to be careful because if he starts telling me ideas, I immediately start thinking of all the problems associated with them. That could be a challenge as well, so you have to balance that.

Darby, if there are readers who want to reach out to you, follow what you are doing, or hire you to come work with their leadership team or speak at their event. What’s the best way for them to get in touch with you?

I’m pretty much on all social media. I’m most active on LinkedIn at Darby Vannier. My website is BeIndispensable.com. You can go there and the social media links are there. There’s a contact form and it has information about me and my book. If they visit BeIndispensable.com, that will get them everything they need.

Darby, thank you so much for being here. I enjoyed talking with you.

Thanks a lot, Gary. I appreciate it.

It’s time for our new segment, Guess The Why. For this segment, I want to use somebody that’s current. If you are watching the TV series Yellowstone with Kevin Costner, you know his daughter named Beth. Beth is an attorney. She does not follow the rules, beats to her own drums, and is willing to throw a tantrum, fight, kick, and scratch to do whatever she needs to do to win. If you have watched it, you’d know who I am talking about. I would love to know what you think her why is because, for me, it’s obvious.

I believe Beth’s why is to challenge the status quo and think differently. She does not do law the way everybody else does. She says whatever she wants to say. She drives and creates for people in ways they never thought of. I’m sure she solves legal problems in an outside-the-box solution. I believe Beth’s why is to challenge the status quo. What do you think? If there is an area for you to write below, go ahead and do that because I love your perspective. If you have not yet discovered your why, you can do so at WhyInstitute.com with the code PODCAST50. You’ll be able to get it at half price. Thank you so much for reading, and I will see you next time.

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About Darby Vannier

BYW S4 16 | Indispensable LeaderA respected operations executive whose diverse background includes leading multimillion-dollar, multilocation organizations and turning around underperforming operations into profitable, viable companies. His career spans 20+ years in corporate and nonprofit areas, where he’s leveraged broad, cross-functional experience to provide a holistic approach to operations management. He also specialize in revamping operational processes to strengthen efficiencies, enact long-term change, and improve overall performance.

A true servant leader, he is committed to hiring and developing talent who remain loyal and grow with the organization. A large part of his success comes from forging strong partnerships with colleagues and stakeholders alike, as well as respectfully challenging ideas, gaining consensus among groups, and establishing cohesive, positive cultures.

**CAREER HIGHLIGHTS**

➺ Drove high growth at a professional services organization by developing new processes and best practices.

➺ Executed a major restructure for Alpaca Owners Association and guided the organization through several strategic planning initiatives; formulated and carried out strategies, hired and built teams, created new policies/procedures, headed rebranding and PR efforts, implemented the IT infrastructure, established HR functions, and developed training protocols.

➺ Facilitated a smooth merger of 2 competing national associations (Alpaca Registry Association and Alpaca Owners & Breeders Association); navigated several aspects of the merger, including operational and legal functions, board communication, and negotiations.

**EXPERTISE**

Operations Management, Restructuring, Change Management, Strategic Planning & Execution, Budgeting, Business Partnering, Process Improvement, Relationship Development, Organizational Development, Trend Analysis, Policy Development, Financial Management, Negotiations, Team Leadership, Mergers, Training & Development, Public Relations, Expense Control

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Podcast

The Strength Of Your WHYs: Finding A Better Way To Success With Raymond Kemp

BYW S4 15 | Finding A Better Way

 

You are the ultimate innovator of your life, and as a person, you are bound to seek a better way to do everything. So how can you make things better? The strength of your WHY is the same thing that presents as a challenge. Nothing is ever “right” because things can always be “better.” Raymond Kemp is an experienced senior executive in leadership and Human Resources. He joins Dr. Gary Sanchez in this episode to talk about WHY we tend to find and pursue a better way of life. Listen in as they discuss the WHYs of improvement and the endpoint of contentment.

Watch the episode here:

Listen to the podcast here:

The Strength Of Your WHYs: Finding A Better Way To Success With Raymond Kemp

In this episode, we are going to be talking about the why of a better way. If this is your why then you are the ultimate innovator and you are constantly seeking better ways to do everything. You find yourself wanting to improve virtually anything by finding a way to make it better. You also desire to share your improvement with the world. You constantly ask yourself questions like, “What if we tried this differently? What if we did this another way? How can we make this better?” You contribute to the world with better processes and systems while operating under the motto, “I’m often pleased but never satisfied.”

You are excellent at associating, which means you are adept at taking ideas or systems from one industry or discipline and applying them to another, always with the ultimate goal of improving something. I have a great guest for you. His name is Raymond Kemp. He is a highly experienced Senior Executive in leadership and Human Resources. He has years of experience at the highest levels of the US Navy as the Fleet Master Chief of Europe and Africa. In his duty assignment, Raymond directed and influenced over 56,000 service members, civilians, contractors and family members across the European and African continents.

He revolutionized Naval leadership education by creating the seminal document, “Laying the Keel,” with an emphasis on character and professional competency. More than 30,000 senior enlisted trainees were impacted by this document. Widely recognized for his exceptional leadership skills, Fleet Master Chief Kemp has received honors from the Office of the President of the United States and the Department of the Navy. Joe Biden appointed him to the American Battle Monuments Commission. Chief Kemp, welcome to the show.

Thank you very much. It is a pleasure and honor to be here with you.

This is going to be a lot of fun. I have been looking forward to having you on the show for a while. I am glad we finally get to do this.

I have had the opportunity to be connected to the WHY Institute and it has been an honor. I have been watching. I was like, “I wonder if I’m going to ever get on to the show?” Here we are and I’m excited about it.

How tall are you?

[bctt tweet=”Leadership is the willingness to step out and be the example; to walk that mission, vision, and guiding principles in a way where others are willing and able to follow. ” username=”whyinstitute”]

I go about 6’1”, probably 230 pounds of twisted steel and sex appeal. I have my fair share of time in the weight room and on the track.

Where were you born? Where did you grow up? What were you like in high school?

I was born in the great nation of Texas and raised in Oklahoma. In high school, I ran track and played football. I was thin growing up. If the wind blew hard, I could feel it. I was lightning fast. I have been a quarterback on a football team in Oklahoma which that is absolutely a sanctuary of both Oklahoma and Texas. Things worked out in my favor. I was shy and finding my way. Maybe because I was thin and I had a bit of a speech impediment, I had a lot of ideas but not necessarily a voice. As I made my way into the Navy, I joined the Navy 30 days after I graduated high school so things accelerated pretty quickly.

Why the Navy?

I was born in the ’60s raised in the ’70s. I vividly remember 60 minutes talking about stress and hypertension in those days. I have seven aunts. They would get up in the morning and they would be going off to work but I had an uncle who would be at home. I would go over to this little town called El Reno in the summertime. They would all go off to work and I thought to myself, “I don’t want that stress.” My uncle stayed there with my cousins and me. He would say, “Go out there, pick up the twigs underneath that tree and bring in some baby carrots.” I thought, “That is the job I want.”

I didn’t realize that he was a Marine. He served in World War II, Korea, Vietnam and retired from the services. Once I realized that that was his way to make ends meet and he had retired, I was like, “I want to do that.” When the recruiters came to the school, I took the Armed Services Vocational Aptitude Battery Test. I did pretty well on it. The Navy had a great offer and promises to see the world. They had some Gucci uniforms. It was an easy decision for me.

It seemed like a better way.

I was pretty decent at football and good at track. I had a couple of offers to do some things in school but I was tired of school. It wasn’t that I wasn’t good at it. I didn’t like it anymore. There was a different opportunity or a better way and there I went.

What was it like going into the Navy at that age and time?

I want to be very clear about this. When I was making my way through, it was what it was. It was the mid-’80s. You think about leadership in the Navy at the mid-level and higher-level is once you get into the 15, 20-year mark. I joined the Navy in 1986. The leaders there had joined the Navy in 1966 or the late-’60s and early-’70s. That means that they were living through the civil rights era and a very grotesque social climate in America at the time for somebody who is Black like me. When I joined the Navy, it was what it was. I was born in Texas and raised in Oklahoma.

I had been called all sorts of names and treated in various different ways but I learned how to survive. When I joined the Navy, I became a Data Processing Technician. I went to my first ship which is an aircraft carrier out of Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. My first interaction with a master chief, the 1% of the Navy, was to check into the ship. I had never seen one in person. I’m expecting to go into the Automated Data Processing Center which is where all the computer dudes went. He told me, “I don’t allow any people in a computer room so you are going to go over here and do this manual labor.”

That language to some people might be shocking but to me, it was just language. My aunts, mother and grandmother were fierce angels. They told me of this rhyme, “Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me.” That language he used meant nothing to me. I had been told that the Navy and Military was a meritocracy. I was like, “Where do I go?” Once I found out where I went, I went in and did my best regardless of whether it was what I was trained to do as a Computer Technician or not. Ultimately, it ended up working out. I made my way into the Automated Data Processing Center and just crush grooving and body moving after that.

BYW S4 15 | Finding A Better Way
Finding A Better Way: Life and death are real things in a combat environment, and there is a greater measure of obligation given to an enlisted person.

 

How long did it take you to get to what you went there to do in the first place?

In those days, it was common to do some temporarily assigned duties. KP duty was what it was called in the old days. For me, it took nine months. It was supposed to be a three-month event but for me, it ended up being a nine-month event. During that nine months, what he meant for my bad, worked out for my good because my goal was to go in, make E-5, retire and go back to Oklahoma. He had sent all of the other Blacks into that particular division. As soon as I got there, I was like, “There is an E-5 right there.” If he can do it, I know I can do it. He will probably help me if I ask a question and he showed me the way. That was exactly what happened. By the time that nine months was over, I was already fully prepared to make the first advancement in my career and I did. I’m ahead of my peers and they say, “I was on my way.”

You went from doing KP duty to doing data processing. How long were you there?

I was in the data processing field and information systems technology field for twenty years. I transitioned into the command path of the Navy. I was there for four years, from ‘86 to ‘90. I did some time in the first Gulf War which started around 1991. I was stationed in Washington, DC at the time. I was hopping around the globe. My first tour of duty was the bootcamp in San Diego but then from Philly back to San Diego to Washington, DC. I’ll be in California. I moved around a lot.

Twenty years in the IT field and then you set into leadership.

The Navy path is you are either in your technical field or at a certain rank. You can transition to a strict leadership field. At the 24-year mark, I transitioned from the Information Systems Technician Master Chief, which was the actual work was the top of the field at the time. I was stationed in Pentagon and then I transitioned to be a Command Master Chief. I had the opportunity to be selected to go to the Army Sergeants Major Academy, which is a full school year out in El Paso at Fort Bliss. I went to my first ship as the Command Master Chief. The Command Master Chief, Commanding Officer and Executive Officer are the triads of command. The three who are in charge of the fighting, training and administration of the ship.

[bctt tweet=”People really don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care.” username=”whyinstitute”]

Is it common for someone to go from KP to a Master Chief?

The KP would be the very beginning of the career. That nine months’ worth of training and hard labor because I was painting walls, pulling tile up off of the deck on the ship, re-putting a tile down and replacing desks and racks and things like that. Lots of miscellaneous and heavy labor stuff. That was the beginning of my career.

Once I transitioned into the computer room after those nine months, I was able to stay there and then maneuver within the information systems technician responsibilities to the highest levels. At that point, I made that transition. It’s not common because according to the US Code Title 10, the law, only 1% of the Navy can be master chief. It’s uncommon to make it to master chief. Once we get there, it’s about 330,000 people in the Navy. In that top 1%, there were only 600 that were command master chiefs.

Why didn’t you quit? When you weren’t given what you wanted when you were told to do something you didn’t want to do and you were told in a way that wasn’t nice, why not quit?

I’m from a group of people who taught me the value of hard work and let me know that I’m always representing somebody other than myself. Quitting was not an option. There was not necessarily a point in my career where I was thinking about other people. I was often thinking about a better way for me to get into a position to have some impact and influence over this organization. From a division, departmental level, onboard the ship, to the entirety of the ship and perhaps even a fighting force, I sought after that. I knew that I wanted to have an influence but when I got to the twenty-year point, the time that I could retire. I was 37 years old. I could get a good pension and go back home but I still have things to do. I realized that I could go higher.

What was the transition like going from IT to leadership?

The pathway in the Navy had given me exposure to more than IT. When I was on an aircraft carrier, we had approximately 5,000 or so people. Amongst that 5,000, maybe only 100 to 200 worked in combat systems. As a duty section leader, when the ship pulls into the port whether it be overseas or at home in America, there has to be a small contingent that stays onboard the ship in case there is an emergency like fighting fires or getting the ship underway. In the event of something as catastrophic as 9/11, be able to put the ship out to sea and then fight the ship at sea. As a duty section leader, I have exposure to all different ratings and professional responsibilities onboard the ship.

BYW S4 15 | Finding A Better Way
Finding A Better Way: It sounds seductive to have a flat organization where everybody just seems to be equal, but there has to be some structure there.

 

I enjoyed having the impact and influence on other professions than just information systems. I knew I wanted to go to a higher level. The day that I got advanced to master chief, my Command Master Chief said, “I want your package on my desk on Monday. No excuses.” He too, wanted me to go into that rating. Once I made that transition and had the opportunity to use my intellectual agility to help people solve their problems at a higher level, it was extremely challenging. It was very satisfying because my perspective, background and job were different from other jobs.

For example, an Aviation Ordnanceman is someone who builds bombs, loads them on aircraft, we launch those bombs and deal with data. The information system technician has a different processing level of troubleshooting problems and things like that. When I had the opportunity to share this different perspective with these other jobs, it was fulfilling to see them grab ahold of those ideas and realize there is a better way.

How long were you in leadership and a Master Chief?

I was a Master Chief for eleven years and I was in that leadership position for that same amount of time.

What is it like leading in the Military versus now you are out of the Military and leading in the civilian world?

It’s not very much of a difference. The difference is that there as different risks. Life and death is a real thing in a combat environment and onboard ships. There is a greater measure of obligation given to an enlisted person. There is a higher level of loyalty built into, “I will stay here without question for at least four years until I transfer to another command or until I met my obligation and I get out of the Navy.” In the civilian world, we know there is not that same measure of loyalty to an organization without some leadership built into it.

It is interesting that we are having this conversation because I was playing some golf with a friend of mine who is a colonel here at the Air Force base and is about to get out. I did some work with the Air Force. I found it interesting how he was able to talk to the people he was in charge of. The word choices were not necessarily what I would expect in the private world or civilian world versus what he was able to say. You could order someone to do something as the leader, whereas in the civilian world it’s a different conversation, at least that was my perspective. How do you feel about that?

[bctt tweet=”When you’re able to express a measure of care, you create a measure of trust. ” username=”whyinstitute”]

There is a difference in the way we communicate in the Military than in the civilian sector. That goes to a couple of things. First and foremost, there is an expectation of a measure of aggression, honor, courage, commitment and dedication to the mission you are assigned to and the organization. Whereas in the civilian sector, there may not be that same measure of obligation. There may not be that, “I’m all in or I’ll die for you,” in there. Because there is a disparity like that then there is a lot more influence that has to go into the leadership rather than by order. The hardest and biggest challenge for myself and those like myself who had turned a certain rank, even with that colonel is learning the language.

Also, learning that I have a certain level of care that I will be able to express to you through language but also in the way that I treat you with dignity and respect will generate some momentum. What I have found, at least as I have talked to others who have decided to go and work in the civilian sector, what they have done is they have realized that, “My language has to be different but my heart does it. I can still lead with my heart. I can still let somebody know that I’m all in for them. I shift my language.” That same measure of influence is in place and then they can still lead the way.

I asked him this question after I went out to work with him because it was so odd for me. I haven’t been in the Military. We went and had lunch and he walked into the room and everybody stood up. He walks to the front of the line and gets his food. I’m right there with him and it’s an odd experience if you’re not used to that. I said, “You’re in here, you’re the guy and you go outside of the base and nobody knows and you don’t get that same treatment. What is that like for you mentally to be the guy in there but nobody else knows that?”

Each service does it differently. Some folks believe that leaders should eat last and all their troops should eat their food first. They should ensure that they are taken care of. When they come in and are troops, sailors, airmen soldiers and Marines, they see that they allow them to eat first. If they are eating last, that generates a certain measure of sanctity within the organization. For the Navy and the senior officers in the Air Force, what ends up happening is that they are continuously reminded that you are just a man. There is a trusted agent that they have that is close to them that reminds them that they are not a God. As the Stoics would say, “You are just a man.”

When that transition takes place then we are able to make that transition realizing and knowing that only in certain environments will folks stand or make a hole so you can get by. Interestingly, my aunts came to visit. I’m twenty or so years into the Navy. They are going to see Oprah Winfrey. She had a play on Broadway. My ship happened to be in town. They are like, “We should go by and see Raymond.” They come to the ship. We have about 10,000 visitors per day. The line is a mile long. I tell them, “Tell the taxi cab to come to the street.” They come to the very front. They have been with me my whole life.

We took some photos but it was their first time to see me in uniform and my workspace. The line is probably a quarter-mile. Maybe about a par five from where we were standing to get to the pier. I put my hand on the sailor’s shoulder and I was like, “Do you mind if we get by?” He looked over his shoulder, he saw me and he was like, “No problem. Hold on, would you take a picture with my mom?” I click. We take a photo and then he shouts, “Make a hole.” Hundreds of people moved out of the way. My aunts are looking at each other like, “What in the world is going on?” They slip into character. They didn’t slow down at all. They stepped right in between everybody and made their way up to the front.

I share that long story with you that we realized that it’s only in those environments where that takes place, not at the grocery store, if we go to Ruth’s Chris or anything like that but only in that environment. That transition in the workplace is a bit tough because you expect people to bow down to that measure of service you have got before, especially in a meritocracy. That transition into the workplace and those folks not maneuvering that way is somewhat of a challenge for Military members.

BYW S4 15 | Finding A Better Way
Finding A Better Way: With a good attitude and a positive outlook, you can create an environment where the folks in your stead realize when you care about them.

 

Let’s talk about Laying the Keel.

Thinking back to the days when we were building wooden ships and that one hard piece of wood that went down the middle was the keel. We build out from there. What we had done in the Navy is we had gotten away from leadership fundamentals in a step-by-step way to growing and building. In laying the keel, there are several different portions of the document and I wasn’t responsible for the entirety of the document. I was responsible for the initiation of the senior enlisted portion of the document. We methodically built out leadership waypoints for sailors as they make their way through their careers.Whether it be Sailor 360, a very specific educational program that they went offsite to learn to a means of when you get back to your command and continuing that conversation. The Laying the Keel document itself was the formality of building out a sailor individually throughout their career. There are different waypoints so that they would be soundly built to make their way to those senior positions.

It sounds like it’s something that would be good for businesses as well.

There is no doubt. These days, it’s important for there to be some measure of hierarchy, though we seem to be seeking after very flat organizations. It sounds seductive to have a flat organization where everybody seems to be equal but there has got to be some structure there. Whether you have a very young person who comes in like NASA who has got innovative, great ideas that are rocket science, I’m sure that is absolutely important.

It’s smart to train folks in such a way where one, they know how to talk to people. Two, they know how to put those structures in place so that they can, in a very balanced way, award and celebrate those things that are done properly. I agree in the civilian sector, it would be very useful to ensure that people, as they make their way towards the C-suite or executive suite, they have the proper training to maneuver in that space once they get there.

Do you do leadership training?

[bctt tweet=”Your attitude determines your altitude.” username=”whyinstitute”]

I do some training and coaching but the majority of what I do is come in and talk to them about leadership. Every now and then that leads to, “Exactly what do you mean by the ABCs of leadership?” I can then talk to them about attitude, belief, character and how to grow those leaders in a fashion that you want them to leave the company.

How do you define leadership?

Leadership is the willingness to step out and be the example, to walk that mission, vision and guiding principles in such a way where others are willing and able to follow you.

Is leadership something you can learn? Is leadership something you either have or don’t? What have you seen?

In my experience, it’s much the same as my daughter, Mahogany is an uncanny skill at throwing a football. She has a flat-out canon and it’s not something that I taught her. She got some decent DNA. She can throw a very tight spiral at a great distance. Leadership, in the same way, there are some people who have the ability to communicate with others in such a way that it inspires confidence. There are some folks, like myself, who may not have started with a high level of confidence but grew and developed it based on experience and then became a leader. Oftentimes, there is an argument between do you build leaders or are born? I would say both. There are some who are born into it and they can become better. There are some who may not necessarily be born into it but we can develop those leadership traits to help them get there.

What was the biggest turning point in your life or career where you said, “Now, I’m a leader,” because you said you were shy? You didn’t feel like you had a great speech. You went into the Military and at some point, you had to become a leader. What was that turning point for you?

It happened early. What I didn’t mention is that growing up in elementary school and high school, I played sports and oftentimes because of my athletic prowess, I was somewhat of a leader. I wasn’t always a team captain but once I joined the Navy, I was four days in and they told me, “You are the sixth squad leader.” They told me in bootcamp that Navy means Never Getting Volunteered Yourself. I was responsible for twenty other folks within my bootcamp company. It was at that point that I realized that even though I may have this slur, lisp or whatever name that other people might give it. I’ve got to get over that. I’ve got to help people on my team understand how to do push-ups and things like that.

BYW S4 15 | Finding A Better Way
Finding A Better Way: When you’re doing things in goodness and in order, when you’re doing things with character, they’ll trust to know that no matter what the face of your organization is, the standard is maintained.

 

It was at that point when the leadership was thrust upon me that I realized, “This is what my life is going to be. I’m going to lead the way the whole way.” That was exactly what happened. At different levels throughout my career, there was a time when I was assigned to do something that I didn’t fully know. Whether it be a technical thing or a warfighting event, I didn’t fully understand how to do it specifically but I understood how to tap into the people who did, build a resilient team and then fight one.

How do you do that? How do you tap into the people you have and build a resilient team?

The first thing that has to happen is to express a level of care. It has become common to say that people don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care. When you are able to express that measure of care, that creates a measure of trust because trust is super important. The next thing would be the attitude. I come from an environment where they say that your attitude determines your altitude. With a good attitude and a positive outlook, you create an environment where the folks in your stead realize that when you care about them too, you have a solid attitude. It’s not just a good attitude despite it all. It’s because you have studied and prepared.

The next is belief and character. First of all, belief comes when you have studied, surveyed the territory and helped people understand that what we are doing is a righteous event and stuff that needs to be done. Doing those things with a character that is when no one else is looking, people know that you are giving it your all and that there is honor and integrity in what you are doing. That creates an environment where those folks working with you, no matter what their background or differences, there may be between you that you are trustworthy and people will follow after that.

That is the ABCs, Attitude, Belief and Character. It’s almost like the ABC.

That level of care is the first step in building trust.

You mentioned that because of your stature and size, you could be easily misinterpreted. How have you overcome that?

If I had known the language of my why, how and what, that would certainly have helped. In the last years of my career, I carried probably between 250, 260 pounds. I was hulking in my presence. I used to tell people that this is all leadership. If I would come into this base, I have my hand on the thermostat just on my physical presence. Because of that, it made some people uncomfortable. If I had the language of, “I am truly here to find a better way. The way that I’m going to do that is by challenging the status quo and traditional thinking, which may be a bit intrusive. I assure you that what you are going to feel when I leave is that there has been a contribution made to everyone who works here and to the greater good of the mission of this particular organization.”

[bctt tweet=”There are some people who have the ability to communicate with others in a way that inspires confidence. And there are some who may not have started with a high level of confidence but grew and developed it based on experience.” username=”whyinstitute”]

I didn’t have that at the time so I had to prove it. I would enter into a space. I would go in and talk to people, especially as the Inspector General for sailor programs for the Navy. It was often intimidating. I would come into a space and look to establish that level of care and the sincerity that would allow me to prevent misinterpretation or unexpected coercion.

How long have you been out?

I retired in 2019.

How has that been for you?

It’s been interesting. It was a little clunky. I spent about a year in Virginia and then COVID came. I wasn’t sure exactly what I wanted to do whether I wanted to go work for another organization or start Kemp Solutions and do that full-time, which I chose to do. It has been exciting, rewarding and fulfilling because, first of all, to be an entrepreneur is super-duper challenging but then connecting with good people and finding out information helped me become a better person. When I connected with Dan, Lisa Schermerhorn and got introduced to yourself and the WHY Institute. My life accelerated in a way that I can see inside myself and I’m thinking, “I can’t wait to share this with others.” It has been an exciting time.

With Kemp Solutions, who would be your ideal client? Who are you looking to work with?

Not necessarily trapped into a particular industry but a diverse organization that is looking to build their resiliency and loyalty within their organization are the exact right folks for me. I can talk with them as a leadership expert and help them maneuver between the challenges we have been making our way through. Whether it is the social injustice and reform we are fighting through in society or the pandemic. Those organizations that are looking to build strong teams in that environment are the right ones for me.

I’m going to give you a challenge. This is a common scenario that I hear and probably people reading this could be experiencing this same thing. We are taught in a lot of the leadership courses and experts about five generations of people in the workforce. They all came from different backgrounds and experiences. You have more women, minorities and diversity. Everything is diverse but with that comes a lot more unknowns. How do you handle working with a 50-year-old versus a 40-year-old versus a 30-year-old versus a 20-year-old? Sometimes we are taught, “You have to know everything about each one of them to be able to handle their different issues.”

It almost feels like you are babying them. You got to baby your team to get them to do anything and it doesn’t seem like it works very well. I was met in the parking lot by a guy that said, “I got to talk to you. I tried that route. I watched it happen.” It has backfired a little bit on him. He is almost feeling like he wants to go the opposite route where it’s like, “I don’t want any babies on my team. I don’t want to have to deal with all your crap. I don’t want to know all the stuff going on in your life. I want you to come and do what we need to have done.” What is your perspective on that?

I am not a big fan of handholding and spoon-feeding. However, I realize that there is a time to hold hands and bring that spoon to someone else’s lips. When an organization has a standard that everyone is clear on, “They are the bedrock foundations of our company, this and this. We shall do our level best at all of these things and that is who we are.” I am not necessarily seeking to over diversify, force or ensure that we have this smattering of people throughout the organization. What we do have is a standard that the organization is going to work towards as a whole.Especially at the head, when you’re doing things in goodness , in order and character, they will trust to know that no matter what the face of your organization is, they will know that the standard is maintained. Knowing every single thing about a person depending on the size of the organization is certainly challenging. Expressing a level of care beyond just the cursory, “How was the weekend? How are the kids?” Knowing the kids’ names and things like that. When you are operating with sincerity, people realize that it is true. That is when that trust goes beyond the formality of the organization.

It’s not necessarily an overabundance of babysitting, handholding and spoon-feeding. It is a true expression of the company’s mission, vision, guiding principles and the standard at which we are going to work within the organization. That is what is going to draw people in and it’s going to draw and build that loyalty as well. I’m somewhat disappointed when some leadership experts say the same thing you are talking about. You have to know every person’s intimate details and be drawn into those things. We need to let people know what our standards are, adhere to those standards, do our best and then keep it pushing.

The part about setting the standard, living the standard and being the standard, this is the way we do things is so valuable because that oversees or overshadows everything else. If you meet the standard and you want to be part of this standard, you are in. If you don’t want to be part of this standard, that is okay too.

There is another opportunity for employment in other places.

What I noticed with the one that I was talking about is they have some high standards but I’m not sure the leader lives the standards visibly.

That is the thing too. The culture comes from the highest level of leadership. The climate comes from that frontline supervisor. The highest levels in leadership need to ensure that those frontline leaders understand and know that they are not talking about it but they are walking and talking about it. Those frontline leaders are the ones who can convey to the rest of the workforce, “I know for sure that the leadership is doing these things even though you may not see them,” because what happens is you build some synergy in the relationships. If the leader at the highest levels of leadership is not doing it then the culture is going to be a little shaky.

BYW S4 15 | Finding A Better Way
Finding A Better Way: Trust goes beyond the formality of the organization. It’s not necessarily an overabundance of babysitting, handholding, and spoon-feeding, but it’s what’s going to draw people in and build their loyalty.

 

If people are reading that want to have you speak, work with their teams and companies or mentor them, what would be the best way for them to get in touch with you?

My website is www.Kemp-Solutions.com. I’m on all social media platforms @RaymondDKemp. On LinkedIn is Raymond D. Kemp Sr. I’m available.

Thank you so much for being here. I’m sorry to put you on the spot like that.

I like it.

I figured you probably would. That was a better way that you came up with. Thank you so much for spending the time with us. I look forward to working and staying in touch with you as we go on our journeys. What is the best piece of advice you have ever been given or gotten?

The best advice that was ever given and I continue to give to others come in the form of ten two-letter words that make you a better man, woman and leader. Those words are, “If it is to be, it is up to me.” It is a bit of a mantra that I live by. I’m not looking for a handout. I’m looking to make my own way. I’m looking to help other people do the same. I was told that some number of years ago as I was fighting my way through some challenges in advancement in the Navy. It had worked out in my favor. Everyone could use those ten two-letter words.

We have all heard it but living it is something different. How were you able to live that?

The Navy determines your professional capabilities in your written exam and the school system that I went through didn’t necessarily prepare me for multiple-choice tests, certainly not worded in the way that I was given. I realized that the rote memory techniques that I had been taught weren’t necessarily the best ones for me. I had to shift into using flashcards and other diverse means of preparation. When I realized there is not just one way to do things, there are many different ways. I realized, “I’ve got to make sure I do my due diligence and do my best when it comes down to everything I put my hands to if I want to be successful.” That was it. Despite what anyone else said or the obstacles in front of me, it was about effort. It was persistence over resistance.

I have another question I wasn’t probably supposed to ask but it popped in my head and I want to ask you. You didn’t have it easy. You weren’t given everything that you got. You had challenges to overcome. You had people that didn’t treat you nicely. You had a lot of stuff that maybe wasn’t right. How did that shape you? Did it shape you? It didn’t destroy you. In this world, everybody is offended by everything. You try to take every offensive thing out of life to have a perfect upbringing. I wonder if that will end up being a good thing.

I did not grow up in an environment where everybody got a T-shirt and trophy. I grew up in an environment where you had to earn what you got. Even when it was systematically unfair that there were still some good things that came out of that. The master chief I talked to you about when I first joined the Navy was throwing dirt on top of me. He had no idea I was a seed. I would grow into the tree that I became and bear fruit. I’ll never taste some of that fruit but still bear fruit so that other harvests could grow. I do believe that there is something wrong when we try to avoid offending or create some environment where people don’t have to come against controversy and friction.

I believe that the friction that I went through was what I needed to grow and be built into who I became. It’s the same as I believe that it is okay for there to be some measure of friction and disagreeance. There is great value when we can come together and reason with one another. There shouldn’t just be abuse as we have seen throughout American history and beyond. It didn’t destroy me. When I looked back over the challenges that I overcame, they created me into who I am.

Thank you.

It’s time for our Guess The Why segment and for this segment, I want to use somebody that a lot of people know, especially if you’re into sports and you followed Tom Brady and the New England Patriots. I want to know. What do you think is the why of Coach Bill Belichick? He is always in the hoodie. He is known as the guru in football. He has won the most championships of anybody. He did have Tom Brady on his team. There is the debate of is it because of Tom or Bill? He is known as a great mind in the football world.

What do you think his why is? I think his why is to make sense. He is able to make sense out of complex and challenging things and help people get unstuck, move forward, be able to zig and zag and make adjustments on the fly easily. That was what made him into a great coach. What do you think? If there is an area for comments, let us know what you think. Thank you for reading. If you have not yet discovered your why, you can do so at WHYInstitute.com. You can use the code PODCAST 50 and get it for half off. If you love the show, please don’t forget to subscribe below. Leave us a review and rating on whatever platform you are using. Thank you so much for reading.

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About Raymond Kemp

BYW S4 15 | Finding A Better WayRaymond Kemp is a highly experienced senior executive in leadership and Human Resources. He has over 10 years of experience at the highest levels of the US Navy. As the fleet master chief of Europe and Africa, In his final duty assignment Raymond directed and influenced over 56,000 service members, civilians, contractors and family members across the European and African continents.

He revolutionized naval leadership education by creating the seminal document “Laying the Keel” with an emphasis on character and professional competency. More than 30,000 senior enlisted trainees were impacted by this document.

Widely recognized for his exceptional leadership skills, fleet master Chief Kemp has received honors from the office of the president of the United States and the department of the Navy. He was most recently appointed by Joe Biden to the American Battle Monuments Commission.

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Podcast

Breaking Barriers Through Language: The WHY Of Make Sense With Gregory V. Diehl

BYW S4 14 | Breaking Barriers

Teaching or learning a language is one way of breaking barriers between people. Gregory V. Diehl is a thinker, author, and mentor whose travels and strong WHY of Make Sense have taken him across the world. Dr. Gary Sanchez catches up with Gregory as they talk about one of his new works: helping Armenians learn the English language and training teachers to teach more effectively. We hear about Gregory’s roots, how he discovered his WHY, and his experiences as a digital nomad. Stay tuned and be inspired by Gregory as we explore his works and his purpose.

Watch the episode here:

 

Listen to the podcast here:

Breaking Barriers Through Language: The WHY Of Make Sense With Gregory V. Diehl

We go beyond talking about your why, helping you discover and then live your why. If you are a regular reader, you know that every episode we talk about 1 of the 9 why’s, and then we bring on somebody with that why, so you can see how their why has played out in their life. In this episode, we are going to be talking about the why of make sense.

If this is your why that you are driven to solve problems and resolve challenging or complex situations, you have an uncanny ability to take in lots of data and information. You tend to observe situations and circumstances around you, and then sort through them quickly to create solutions that are sensible and easy to implement.

Often you are viewed as an expert because of your unique ability to solve problems quickly. You also have the gift of articulating solutions and summarizing them clearly in understandable language. You believe that many people are stuck, and if they could make sense out of their situation, they could develop simple solutions and move forward. In essence, you help people get unstuck and move progress forward.

I’ve got a great guest for you. His name is Gregory Diehl, a personal development mentor whose ideals include self-inquiry, challenge, and analysis for the purpose of helping people to discover who they are. He writes to assist others in undoing faulty narratives about who they are and how life works so that they may begin to make more meaningful choices and resolve their deepest burdens. Diehl spent many years studying cultures around the world. He now lives a quiet life in a rural village in Armenia with his cats, book and music. Gregory, welcome to the show.

First, thanks for having me. Second, that long description you gave of the person who has made sense as their why describes me probably better than anyone has ever described to me before in my life. In fact, that’s a major part of the reason why I write books. From a very young age, I realized I had this uncanny ability to figure out how things work. More importantly than that, articulate those things for other people.

That manifested in many ways in my life. Getting involved in various education-related professions eventually got me into sales, too. I realized a lot of selling was explaining to people how something worked and why they needed it. It mostly takes the form of my writing. Most of the stuff I write can be described as that, me trying to explain some complex and important topics for people to make sense out of it.

Let’s go back then. Take us through, Gregory. I know you are in Armenia now, which we will get to at some point. Where were you born? What were you like in high school? Tell us a little bit about you.

I was born in San Diego, California, and spent the first eighteen years of my life there. I became obsessed with trying to make sense out of the world. I did that primarily by traveling for the next ten years or so. I wanted to see as many different parts of the world as I could because I was curious about how this place worked. I didn’t accept the explanations and the stories given to me by common sources of knowledge about how the world worked.

I did that for a while and felt like I was starting to make sense out of the world. I decided I needed to spend more time focusing on myself. A few years ago, I came to Armenia. My grandmother was from Armenia. I’m partially descended from here. I was able to get citizenship by descent. I bought an old house in disrepair in a village. Since then, I have been fixing it up and building a life for myself here in that time. It was right before Coronavirus happened, which made travel much more difficult anyway. It was a good time for me to stop traveling.

What happened to you after high school? What are the different places you traveled to? How did you pick them?

I have been to about 56 countries now. The first place I went to was Costa Rica, and that was mostly a convenient thing. It was an easy place for a young California to go hang out for a while with no responsibilities and worries, little money. After that, I wanted to see much more difficult and challenging places. I had to learn how to support myself financially sometimes by taking English teaching jobs locally or learning how to work online and start my own entrepreneurial endeavors, which is a big part of my life now.

BYW S4 14 | Breaking Barriers
Breaking Barriers: The greatest insights and benefits of human intelligence and consciousness come when people are free to pursue what they are interested in and passionate about.

 

It was mostly about saying what place will challenge me the most to make me the most uncomfortable because how its culture works, politics, laws, and the way they do things is totally different than what I’m expecting. To date, I would say the worst place I have ever been in is China. They have a lot of very strange totalitarian and authoritarian policies that hurt the soul of someone like me who values freedom, passion and individuality.

Iraq was another difficult one. There had been a lot of great places, too. Other places that people love to go on vacations like Costa Rica, Bali or something. A place like Armenia is interesting. Not just because they have the family connection here but it’s the place that seems full of talented and skilled people who don’t have a sense of direction for their country or themselves. It’s very strange.

I have coined a term for it, “Armenian self-defeatism syndrome.” It’s one thing if you don’t have the resources or education, which a lot of developing countries don’t. In Armenia, I feel like they mostly have those things. They lack this self-esteem or self-confidence, which is very strange. It’s like the opposite of the American way of life, which is almost that we are too confident. We believe too much in ourselves and are quite pompous to a degree about those things. I don’t know. It’s an interesting experiment for me to try to be here and see if I can positively influence the country in a certain direction.

Here’s what’s going through my mind now. I’m sure a lot of the people that are reading this are thinking the same thing. Take us back to that moment in time where you said to yourself, “I’m not going to do traditional. I’m not going to follow the path everybody else from San Diego where my class is following. I’m going to go off and travel for the rest of my life.” What was that conversation? What was going on? How did you come to that conclusion?

At any age, but especially when you are young, it’s almost impossible to know that the choice you are making is the right choice if you are trying to pick a life direction. This is why it never made sense to me to commit myself to something like a four-year Bachelor’s degree at college, even though I was quite smart and enjoyed learning. I did well in school when I tried it and cared enough to try.

That idea never inherently made sense to me, and no adult proposing that idea ever explained it in a very convincing way. It was always a matter of, “This is what people do.” What are you going to do if you don’t do this? I don’t know but I bet there’s some other option out there that I could figure one out and I did. It was like most of the people my age seemed like made that choice out of a fear of not knowing what else to do. There are some exceptions. I knew a few people who went to school because they were genuinely passionate about studying things like Theoretical Physics. Good on it that they figured out that’s what they wanted to do.

At least 90% of the people when you are eighteen years old and finished high school has no idea what you want to do. I knew I didn’t want to do that. Pretty much anything else would be a superior option to something I knew I didn’t want to do because at least something else would be learning something new about myself.

How did you know you didn’t want to do that?

I saw nothing of myself in that path. There was no part of me that felt like my values and personality would be serviced or fulfilled in any way by going to a university for the purposes of getting a degree or a general education. Perhaps it would have been different if I had been one of those guys who knew for sure, “This is the subject I want to study. I want to be a spinal surgeon, and this is the path I have to take to do that.” That wasn’t me. I don’t think that’s most people. It didn’t make sense to me that it was what I should be doing with my life at that time.

In your senior year in high school, what were you like? How would you describe yourself?

In my senior year of high school, I turned eighteen very early into the year. I moved into a van on my eighteenth birthday, an old Ford Econoline. It sounds like I’m making this up but this happened. I spent a year living in a van before I started traveling and became known around the school as that guy who lived in a van and didn’t wear shoes to school.

[bctt tweet=”When you’re young, it’s almost impossible to know that the choice you’re making is the right choice.” username=”whyinstitute”]

We are getting a clearer picture of what you were like. You are not in some prep school, prepped out, everybody is going to college, and you decided, “I’m not going to.” You were the guy living in the van.

I still did well in school when I cared enough to because I was a smart guy and knew how to take tests well. It was totally about freedom for me. I didn’t see any other way at that time to get freedom from my parents, the rules of how young men were supposed to live and function. If I had been less reckless, perhaps I would have saved up money to rent an apartment or move out on my own. I had a van. I liked the van and the freedom to sleep anywhere and have all my possessions with me at any time. That’s what I did because it made sense to me. The Occam’s razor solution was the easiest possible way to gain independence and freedom.

Why were independence and freedom so important to you?

I don’t like other people telling me what to do and telling other people what to do either, which I mentioned in China before. It was like the antithesis of me because China is where everybody is told what to do all the time to the point that they don’t even realize they are being told what to do because it’s normal for them. The greatest insights and benefits of human intelligence and consciousness come when people are free to pursue what they are interested in and passionate about in whatever way that happens to show up for them, free to form their own lifestyles, beyond whatever arbitrary norms, the culture they live in.

It tells them they should be doing like, “Why not live in a van? Why, because most people don’t do it, and you don’t have running water and a toilet with you at all times?” You will find solutions to those things. That’s a silly example. Obviously, I don’t live in a van anymore. I wouldn’t want to do that anymore. At least not long-term but it’s an example of how an independently minded person can find alternative solutions to lifestyle problems. If you don’t want to live with your parents, you don’t have a place of your own, why not sleep in a car? What’s stopping you? Only you or maybe it’s illegal where you are from. I don’t know.

You became very committed to this idea of freedom.

Yes. Obviously, that was heightened more by my obsession with independent travel after the van. I was like, “What else can I do now to live life the way I want to?” I will move to a Latin American country where I don’t speak the language, nobody knows me, and I don’t need much money to survive.

What was that influence on you that helped you to think this way? You don’t wake up and say, “I’m going to be free for anything I want to do, whenever I want to do it, and how I want to do it.” What influenced you to think like that?

It’s going to sound crazy but there never was a person or a movie I watched or a book I read that put this idea in my head. Obviously, I had read books, watched movies, and met people who influenced me in various ways but it has always been me assessing what is possible and how is that different than what people typically do. There has always been a very clear distinction between those two concepts for me. My parents, the school, society say, “Do this.”

Why is everyone saying do that? Is that how reality works? There are rules to reality. Certainly, we tend to call them things like the Laws of Physics. There are limitations to what we can do but then there are other rules that people make up and insist on. This is also true in the same way like gravity and thermodynamics are true. Those are true in an absolute way that none of us can change. All these other things are stuff people started doing and insisted was the right way to do things.

Some of them do make sense. Some of them are good ideas generally. A lot of them don’t, and they are quite arbitrary. That’s the thing that gets reinforced by travel because you see that, in this country, they do things this way. Everybody is sure that this is the correct way to do them. You step over the border in another country and they are doing things this way. They are all sure that this is the correct way to do them.

BYW S4 14 | Breaking Barriers
Breaking Barriers: Your life is going to have challenges and trials, which you’re going to spend your whole life chasing after because it’s the only thing you’re going to find meaningful.

 

What’s great about talking with you is you had the courage to follow up on what you thought where most of us didn’t. We may have thought what you thought but weren’t willing to live our life that way. We weren’t willing to make that a choice for us full-time like you were.

It helps that I started so young. Perhaps if I had waited a few years longer and gotten entrenched in some job, school or something, it would have been harder. As people get older, they invest their lives into a certain mode of being, which often includes financially and professionally but not just that. It becomes harder to accept the risk of dismantling that, losing that if they make major systemic changes to their lives.

It is part of why I had to learn how to do things like making money online in an independent way because that allowed me to live still wherever I wanted. Even though I have been here a few years, I could get a plane to the other side of the world and mostly keep working. I’m making money and continuing my professional life roughly the same way I do here because all it takes is an internet connection.

You started in Costa Rica, and then you went from country to country. How did you determine what you were going to do, how were you going to do it, and all the rest? How did you figure that out? Was it, “Whatever I feel like what I’m going to go do?”

That’s mostly curiosity. That’s what impels us to do most new things. We want to see what will happen. Anytime we are not trying to do something new, we are trying to repeat something we already know, which is not bad. We want a certain amount of familiarity in your life. Things that you know and enjoy but I was curious about myself and the world.

I know how things work in Latin America. How do they work in Asia? I don’t know. Let’s find out. What other things will I learn about myself by doing this? What new parts of my personality will I see? I didn’t realize it was possible for me to hate a place as much as I hate this place. Let’s go find a place that I love more than I knew was possible for me to do so.

Your favorite place was what? Your least favorite place was what?

China is absolutely my least favorite. That’s no contest there. Favorite is hard to decide because any place can be interesting for a few weeks or even a few months. They are not necessarily the places you would want to live, invest in yourself long-term, build a social network and be part of the community. Obviously, I’m here in Armenia.

I have been here longer than any other place that I have been in a very long time. There must be something I like about this place but is it perfect? Do I still miss the tropics sometimes, coconuts, papayas, and other little lifestyle benefits that come from other parts of the world or friendlier places where people treat me a certain way? Yes, maybe to a degree.

It forces you to confront what is most important to me and my recurring experience of reality, as opposed to, “I love hanging out on the beach for a weekend or the way people treat me in this culture or the mountains in this country.” Do you need to see those things every day? Are you glad that you had the experience once, twice or maybe once a year even, who knows?

It sounds like a lot of alone time in your travels.

[bctt tweet=”Curiosity is what impels us to do most new things.” username=”whyinstitute”]

Yes and no. For a lot of it, I was certainly traveling alone and felt alienated from many of the cultures I went to. Being an English speaker is useful because it was English in about every country in this world so far that I have found. Several years into my travels, I eventually realized that there was something called a digital nomad, which was other people doing the same thing I was doing in a different way, working from a laptop and hanging out in Bali, Thailand or whatever. At a certain point, it became easier to join communities of perpetual travelers and tourists.

That changed my perspective a lot because for the first five years, at least, I was like, “This is me versus the world. I’m not doing my own thing that nobody understands. There are other people doing this. It’s a similar thing, not quite the same thing I’m doing.” It’s another way your mind opens where you think you are doing one thing. You think these are your options, and then you realize is that there’s this whole other world you haven’t explored yet. I’m always looking for more and discovering new options for myself, even here in Armenia, getting involved in new projects, meeting new people. My perspective is constantly changing.

What’s the most valuable thing you’ve learned or a lesson you gained from your time as a digital nomad?

Much of what I have learned from travel is the variety of experiences that come from living this life could be more broadly said to apply to all of life. What we call wisdom is typically being able to derive the principle from a set of experiences and generalize it to all things. You experienced one thing one way, and you realize, “This is true for other kinds of experiences, too.” We call that wisdom typically. The most important thing I have learned from having a wide variety of experiences is that you need to find out what is most important to you out of all possible types of experiences you could have. Anything could be stimulating, entertaining, exciting when it’s new, or even the first few times you do it.

Eventually, you realize this is not sustainably fulfilling to me. There’s something else I want to do, and this isn’t it. What is the thing I should be doing every day of my life that I will continue to find meaningful and get better at? When you get good at any given scalar domain of knowledge, the first 99% you learn it, and you think you understand it.

There’s that remaining 1% that gets increasingly more refined the more you learn about it. I’m a musician. I like playing the piano. There’s one behind me and a few other instruments like the guitar. I’m pretty good at them. I’m probably better than 9 out of 10 people who play them. I watched people who dedicate their lives to these things.

Through things, I can’t even understand like, “How are they playing that many notes so fast and memorizing all these complex pieces?” That’s not my passion. That’s not the thing I need to be doing every day of my life but for those people, it is. There are other things that I do every single day of my life that other people would say, “How do you do this every day? How are you so obsessed with this? How do you reach the levels of refinement on that?”

It’s genuinely fulfilling to me. I would feel like there’s something wrong with me if I weren’t doing it. If you could find out what that thing is, preferably as soon as possible, you can start incorporating that into your life as much as possible. That’s a pretty good way to guarantee some level of happiness, fulfillment, and if you are entrepreneurial, professional success in life, too.

What was that thing that you figured out was most important to you?

It’s what I started talking about. I like explaining how things work because I am the guy who needs to make sense out of things. More than that, I’m the guy who sees problems in everything around me. It’s quite infuriating. In fact, one of the only ways I manage the frustration and the pain that comes from seeing inefficiencies, misconceptions, mistakes in the way people do things all around me is that I try to help fix those things and explain to people, “Here’s a better way to do that.”

First, I started teaching English here for free at the community center in town because I saw the level of English education here. It was atrocious. I’m not particularly passionate about teaching English. I’m passionate about the English language and communication. That’s why I’m a writer but I saw a problem that I was in a unique position to fix. These people have horrible options for learning English, a skill that will help them throughout life, especially if they want to work internationally and travel.

BYW S4 14 | Breaking Barriers
Breaking Barriers: We’re all in a position to improve the way things are done to create something that didn’t exist before to change the world for the better and perhaps make money at the same time. Why not? That’s what the purpose of entrepreneurship is.

 

That’s going to be much better to speak English than Armenian because no other country speaks Armenian, and every country speaks English to some degree. I felt like I needed to do something to help because I could. I see the problem and the solution, and frankly, no one else is going to do this if I don’t do it. Now that’s turned into I’m teaching other people how to teach English.

I have scaled up to the next level because there was enough of want for this and a need for this solution that, “I can’t teach everyone in the country how to speak English. I’m going to teach other people how to be better English teachers.” What will happen after that? I don’t know. It’s an example of what I need to do for my life to be tolerable or meaningful. I have to solve the problems that I see.

Interestingly, you say it that way because that’s what we believe. When you are able to live your why, you will have passion for what you do. People say, “I’ve got to find my passion.” If what you do is in line with why you do what you do, you will have passion for what you do. Passion is that fuel that gives you the energy to keep pursuing your dreams. In your case, if your why is to make sense out of complex and challenging things, and then you get to do that every day like you said, how much better does it get than that?

I don’t know what other life there is for someone like me. Frankly, I can’t picture there isn’t anything else. I don’t know what that would be.

If you are able to help the people that you are helping discover their why and live their why, they will have that same passion. That’s what’s fueled me exactly what you are talking about right there. If you speak to them in your language of making sense out of things, they may or may not get it but if you are able to speak to them in the language they speak, the same thing. You speak English, they speak Armenian. You don’t speak it.

How good is your communication with them? If you can speak to them in Armenian, we are having a real conversation, even though you are good at English. If you can figure out what their why is and speak to them and their language, the way they want to hear it, it’s so much more effective than speaking in the way you want to say it.

On that note, it has been very hard for me to find people I could look up to as mentors or advice-givers. That’s part of the reason why I was so obsessed with learning things myself, experimenting, seeing the world myself because I didn’t trust what other people had to say about almost anything. Part of that is because they don’t speak my language.

They can’t explain things in a way that will make sense to me or I don’t believe what they are saying for whatever reason. I don’t trust their authority with rare exceptions. There have been some truly great figures in my life but it has always been hard for me to accept what other people tell me is true or is a good idea. I have realized this because not many people speak the same language I do.

I try to embody as much of that language as I can in my writing or teaching. Not to tell everyone you should speak the language I do because it’s the best language. Rather provide an option for other people who do speak that language and think that no one else does like I once did. There will be some people who read one of my books or hear what I have to say and say, “Finally, this guy is saying the thing I have been waiting my whole life for someone to say, “I didn’t know people were saying these things.”

We have a lot of coaches that we have trained in how to utilize the why and the Why OS. This one exercise I did, I didn’t know how it was going to turn out. What I did was I separated all of the coaches into rooms with people that had the same why. That would be putting you in a room with people that all have the why of makes sense.

When we brought everybody back together and said, “What was that like for you?” They were like, “I cannot tell you how wonderful it was to speak to somebody who understood me, somebody who I could connect with right away.” That’s what you are talking about. Let’s talk about your book. In the marketing of your book, if you say something along the lines of, “This book is meant for people that are trying to make sense of these complex things.” If that’s what you are trying to do, you are going to like this.

[bctt tweet=”What we call wisdom is just being able to derive the principle from a set of experiences and generalize it to all things.” username=”whyinstitute”]

It’s interesting because I have written a few of my own books. I’m working on my fifth now. I have helped a lot of other people produce and publish their books, too. There are always several stages it goes through like any product you develop. There’s a beta rating process for people to read the rough draft and say, “I don’t understand this part. What are you talking about? I like this part.” You figure out, “We have to write a book description. How are we going to describe to people what this book is about? We have to pick a title and a subtitle that speaks to that point.”

At least with all of my books, there have always been some people who love them and say things like, “You need to tone this down. Their language use here is way too esoteric. You need to make it more friendly to general audiences.” Those people don’t understand that’s the opposite of what I’m trying to do. I am not trying to force it to be a specific way to be contrary. I’m trying to embody a particular voice in a particular way of thinking about things that are not very well-represented already.

Everything from the title to the book description to the actual content of the book, I want people to look at the book and the cover. Read the title, the description and say, “I’m going to learn things in this book that no other book is going to teach me. This book is made for someone like me.” I have gotten better at that because that is a lot of the responses I get.

When I have interactions with readers, they say, “I read your whole book and learned so many things that nobody else talks about.” I’m like, “I’m glad that the title intrigued you enough that you realized this is the book you should be reading.” Maybe for other readers, they read it and say, “Why would I read a book called that? What’s that got to do with me?” Probably nothing. Don’t read it. It’s fine. Go read another book.

What’s your latest book?

My latest book is either going to intrigue you or has no idea what it’s about, The Heroic and Exceptional Minority: A Guide to Mythological Self-Awareness and Growth. What does that mean?

My mind would go right to the person from Mexico who’s come over to the US, a hero to his people, and turns out to be an amazing minority. That’s where I would have gotten it.

It’s one connotation of the word minority, cultural and racial minority. The word exceptional speaks an exception to the rule literally. Someone who is an outlier, different in some important way, such that you cannot categorize them the same as whatever the norm happens to be. Heroism obviously has a lot of different connotations and interpretations of what does it mean to be heroic. Does it mean saving a cat from a tree? Does it mean self-sacrifice?

I’m very clear and specific in how I define and use these terms in the book. The hero is somebody who goes to extreme lengths to embody their values, which often means at the cost of great personal expense, which might even be dying for what you believe in. It usually means somebody who struggles to accomplish what is important to them that is surreal to them. Exceptional, meaning that they are different somehow than the norm. It might mean that they are smarter, have some ability or perspective that not very many people have.

It might be that they see things differently, and it’s hard for them to communicate their perspective on things to other people. This book is for those kinds of people who are outliers, who are different but feel impelled by what I define as his heroic values to do something meaningful with what makes them exceptional. Those will be different for each person but these principles will be the same for all of them. The purpose of the book, it’s broken up into 36 short chapters, is to discuss different aspects of the life of this person and particularly things you are probably going to struggle with if you are this person, and what to do about that.

What prompted you to write that book?

BYW S4 14 | Breaking Barriers
The Heroic and Exceptional Minority: A Guide to Mythological Self-Awareness and Growth
– https://www.amazon.com/Heroic-Exceptional-Minority-Mythological-Self-Awareness-ebook/dp/B09GD25JBV

I didn’t have many people to say, “Gregory, here’s the deal. You are this person. Your life is going to have these kinds of challenges and trials. These are the things you are going to spend your whole life chasing after because it’s the only thing you are going to find meaningful.” Nobody ever said anything remotely like that to me.

I had to figure that out myself slowly or I give several examples in the book of watching mythological-themed movies or reading books that have certain moral mythological lessons to them, whether that’s something popular and well known. Star Wars has heroic mythological stories of resisting the dark side, staying true to yourself, and rescuing your father from his darkness.

In the Lion King, Simba becomes the king he was supposed to be and rejects hedonism to take on responsibility. I pause that those timeless mythological stories often give us guidance that we might not have in our personal lives. If we don’t have an Obi-Wan Kenobi or a Gandalf in our lives to tell us, “Frodo, this is the journey you are on. Luke, you have to learn to use the force,” which I think frankly, very few of us do.

We still have this architectural idea of what these people are supposed to be and the guidance they are supposed to give us. We can still piece together these universal timeless trues on our own if we are willing to explore and experiment and deal with the costs of doing all those things. This book is meant to summarize all that and say to them, “You are not crazy. If you respond to what is in this book, I’m almost certain that you are this person, so maybe take these things into consideration.”

You discovered your why but there’s also your Why OS. It’s called your Why Operating System, which is your why you do what you do, how you bring that to life, and ultimately what people can count on from you. Based on our conversation, and I bet a lot of the readers would pick this up, your why, which we already know is to make sense out of the complex and challenging. You are a great problem solver. You see things that are keeping people stuck and helping them solve them.

How you go about doing that is by challenging the status quo, thinking differently, thinking outside the box, imagining stuff the rest of us have never even seen. Ultimately, what you bring is a better way to move forward, get results, and live the life that you want. Your why would make sense. Your how would be challenging the status quo, and your what would be finding a better way.

You have described entrepreneurship in a nutshell, which I have also mentioned a few times here. This book isn’t specifically about entrepreneurship but everything described here could be called entrepreneurial principles, which is the subject of my next book. The working title is Everyone is An Entrepreneur, which is about realizing that we are all in a position to improve the way things are done and create something that didn’t exist before to change the world for the better and perhaps make money at the same time. Why not? That’s what the purpose of entrepreneurship, to receive profit for improving the way things are done or creating something that didn’t exist before, which is a very heroic approach to life, at least according to the way I’m using the term heroic.

Last question for you, what’s the best piece of advice you have ever received?

I haven’t received a lot of good advice in my life, unfortunately. The best piece of advice I should have received is if there had been somebody to say this in my language, maybe there were people who tried to say it in ways that I wasn’t ready to hear that’s quite possible. There’s somebody who could have said it in the way that I would have responded to, it would have been, “Gregory, you are not crazy. You are pretty bright and good at figuring things out but you are going to make a lot of mistakes in the process of figuring things out.”

Some of those mistakes are going to have long-term consequences that you might even think at the time you can never recover from but you should at least proceed with the self-confidence that there is a meaning to your madness. You are not just chaotically searching and exploring for no purpose. You are discovering something about yourself that is meaningful and important.

No one can tell you exactly what that’s going to end up being but know that you are not crazy. There is something to this. You have to figure out what that something is yourself. That conversation probably would have changed my life and saved me several years of mistakes. Maybe I would have ignored it completely, interested in everything the same anyway. That’s also possible.

[bctt tweet=”We can still piece together these universal, timeless truths on our own if we’re willing to explore, experiment, and deal with the costs of doing all those things.” username=”whyinstitute”]

If there are people that are reading that want to connect with you, buy your book, and want to learn more about what you are doing, what’s the best way for them to get in touch with you?

The book is available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, or any major online retailer. The title is The Heroic and Exceptional Minority. If you want to contact me, I’m on Facebook or go to my website, GregoryDiehl.net.

Gregory, thank you so much for being here with us. I have enjoyed our conversation. You have gotten me to see things differently. Now that I know what the title of your book is about, it makes a lot more sense to me. I’m excited to check it out. Thank you so much for being on the show.

Thanks for having me.

It’s time for our new segment, which was Guess the Why. Hopefully, you have seen the hit TV series called Yellowstone. I want to know what do you think John Dutton’s why is. John Dutton is the patriarch of the Yellowstone Ranch. There are many things that happened in that series. My wife and I have been watching that. If you have been watching it, what do you think John Dutton’s why is?

He’s the guy who protects the family, takes care of people that he has great relationships with, and got lots of different relationships. I believe that John Dutton’s why is trust, creating relationships based upon trust. If you are on his side, if you have that brand because he brands some of the people that work with him, there’s nothing he won’t do for you.

He will trust you implicitly unless you break it. If you break his trust, you are gone. You are out. I believe that John Dutton’s why is to create relationships based upon trust. What do you think? What’s your take on John Dutton’s why? I want to thank you so much for reading. If you have not yet discovered your WHY, go to WhyInstitute.com and use the code PODCAST50. You can discover your why for free. If you love the show, please don’t forget to subscribe and leave us a review on whatever platform you are on. I look forward to having you next episode. Thank you.

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About Gregory V. Diehl

BYW S4 14 | Breaking BarriersGregory V. Diehl is a personal development mentor whose ideals include self-inquiry, challenge, and analysis for the purpose of helping people to discover who they are. He writes to assist others in undoing faulty narratives about who they are and how life works so that they may begin to make more meaningful choices and resolve their deepest burdens. Diehl spent many years studying cultures around the world. He now lives a quiet life in a rural village in Armenia with his cats, books, and music.

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Podcast

Finding A Better Way To Ignite Lives With JB Owen

BYW S4 13 | Ignite Lives

When you share your transformational story, you create impact and ignite lives. JB Owen, the founder and CEO at Ignite You, is passionate about working with people who have a higher mission and purpose. JB is a fearless female leader and a believer in the power of empowerment. Join in the conversation and witness how JB’s WHY played a huge impact in forming her to be a world-class speaker, 17-time bestselling author, and powerful business owner. She’s helped over 700 authors become international best-sellers. Don’t miss out on this igniting episode!

Watch the episode here:

Listen to the podcast here:

Finding A Better Way To Ignite Lives With JB Owen

If you are a regular audience, you know that every week, we talk about 1 of the 9 whys, and then we bring on somebody with that why so you can see how their why has played out in their life. In this episode, we are going to be talking about the why of Better Way. If this is your why, then you are the ultimate innovator, and you are constantly seeking better ways to do everything. You find yourself wanting to improve virtually anything by finding a way to make it better.

You also desire to share your improvement with the world. You constantly ask yourself questions like, “What if we tried this differently? What if we did this another way? How can we make this better?” You contribute to the world with better processes and systems while operating under the motto, “I’m often pleased but never satisfied.” You are excellent at associating, which means that you are adept at taking ideas or systems from one industry or discipline and applying them to another, always with the ultimate goal of improving something.

In this episode, I’ve got a great guest for you. Her name is JB Owen. She is a fearless female leader and a believer in the power of empowerment. Her true focus is on helping others, which is why she started Ignite Publishing, the leader in empowerment publishing, in 2018. She’s a world-class speaker, a seventeen-time best-selling author, and a powerful business owner. She has published over 700 authors, turning them into international bestsellers. She combines purpose, passion, and possibility in everything she does. She is truly inspirational, motivational, transformational in the way she teaches and empowers others. JB, welcome to the show.

Thank you so much. What a beautiful intro. Thank you for having me.

Tell us a little bit about where you live.

I like to say my furniture is in Canada. I have been traveling for years. I am now on the West side of Canada, and we are experiencing a tiny little bit of snow. We are pretty lucky that it’s the end of November 2021, and we’ve only got a bit of snow. I am enjoying the Rocky Mountains of Alberta, Canada.

Tell us how did you get to where you are now. Where did you grow up? What were you like in high school? Where did you go to school, and how did you get into publishing?

I will quickly tell you the story. I grew up in a small town of 70,000 people. It’s not that small but it felt small to me. I was always an outcast. I was dressing in ways that didn’t fit into the town, doing things, challenging the status quo, planning things, and making all kinds of stuff happen. The town did not understand me at all, so eleven days after I graduated, I moved to Vancouver. I started working in the film and fashion business. I started my own company right out of college, and I have been in film and fashion ever since.

Interestingly enough, when I had my first child, I started a great clothing company. I did that for quite a few years and then had that great self-implosion that many of us have when we entrepreneur ourselves right out of a marriage and our health, so it took a couple of years to ground myself and focus. I started writing and telling stories. I had always been making products and developing things, so it was a natural progression for me to get into publishing, working with private clients, and now, it has grown into this incredible business of Ignite.

[bctt tweet=”Always figure out how you can fix the process, tweak it, and make it better. ” via=”no”]

Let’s go back a little bit. In high school, you were that kid that was a little bit different. For those of you that are reading and cannot see us, JB has platinum-colored hair. Do you change your hair color quite often or not?

I have always been platinum since I was seventeen. I say some people are born blonde, and some are born to be blonde. I have been dying my hair platinum since I was seventeen. I always had big jewelry, big earrings and lipstick. I was loving life, and I have always loved fashion and clothes. When I was a teenager, I had purple and pink hair. I had handcuffs on my boots and leopard pants.

I was way out there, and in a small town in the prairies where everyone is a farmer, it was a shocking thing. In fact, people would phone my parents and say, “I saw your daughter at the mall.” It was shocking to them but I wanted to be in fashion. I wanted to be in the theater and walking the Paris runway. I wanted to be out there doing stuff and so much more than what my small town had to offer.

We had JB discover not only her why but her how and what. Her why is Better Way, and her how is challenge, which explains so much of what we heard. How she does it is by challenging the way things are done and doing things differently, and ultimately, her what is what she brings. It is the right way to get results, the structure and process systems around getting predictable results. When you discovered that, what did that feel like to you?

Your process was phenomenal. It touched my heart. I felt verklempt a little bit because I was like, “It understands me so well if this is exactly who I am.” It was beautiful to read it and see like, “That’s what I do. That’s what I’m good at, and that’s what I love doing.” Sometimes, people chastise you, and they give you a hard time for the way you do things, especially people like me who want to find the better way, who want to find the better way again, who keep going at it, and who are never satisfied. It was so rewarding to read it and be like, “That’s exactly me.”

It’s okay to be you.

I love being me, and it’s taken me a while but I will say that growing up with the name JB, in a small town, wanting to be in fashion, in the movies, and doing things like that was a challenge. Interestingly enough, I worked for fifteen years in the film business, and my job was continuity director. I would be like, “The purse-string was on the left side in this scene. It had to be on the left side of the other scene. The button had to be done up. Everything had to be perfect.” I loved it because I always was seeing how to make it better, how to fix it, and how to tweak it. Your gift often can be your curse but I have always enjoyed having that creative mind to be like, “How do we improve the process? How do we make it better? How do we make it more enjoyable?”

What did you like about fashion and movies? Why was that so intriguing to you?

Probably because I’m a Gemini, so I love that diversity but it is the idea of fantasy, creativity, limitlessness and possibility. I love that. Much of what I teach now is what’s possible, what’s capable, what we can do, and what has not been done before, so television, movies, and designing things were always pushing the limits on what hasn’t been done before.

BYW S4 13 | Ignite Lives
Ignite Lives: Story writing allows you to escape into fantasy.

 

What was the turning point to say, “It’s time for me to move on from this.”

I wanted to have kids, so it was time for me to be a mom. I knew this was going to be my last film. I did my last film with Dwayne Johnson. I had a great experience. I knew I was going to get married that fall and be pregnant by the next year. That’s what better way people do. We plan these things. I had my kids, and within five months of my son, I thought, “Boys get ripped off when it comes to clothing, and there’s nothing out here for UV protection. Also, why isn’t there better rain gear?” Within a very short time, I developed an entire kids’ clothing line. Within four years, I was selling in over 60 countries, 600 stores and had made a million-dollar business because I wanted to find a better way for kids and boys, especially UV protection and all those things. That was the turning point in my film career.

I wonder if having the why of Better Way equates almost to no fear. You should have been scared of that. You were a stay-at-home mom now. What are you doing starting a clothing company?

Going to China and doing business on my own as a platinum blonde woman that is a foot and a half taller than everybody else, they picked me up at the airport with a sign that always said, Mr. Owen. I would laugh because it was so unheard-of women going to Asia to do business. Many years ago, that was not something people did. There was no fear. I haven’t told you this story but my husband and I cycled 6,500 kilometers to the Top of the World Highway in Alaska.

I said to him, “Let’s cycle to the Top of the World Highway. I’m going to tell everybody. I’m going to put it on social media. I’m going to announce it.” He’s like, “What if you fail?” I had to stop and think like, “Fail? There is no fail. If I cycle 10 kilometers, I didn’t fail. I’m going to get as far as I get. That’s never a failure.” It was interesting to me because there is this idea that people are like, “What if you fail? What if it’s not possible? What if you can’t do it?” I feel like I have been put on this planet to show people that it is possible. You can do it. It’s always possible. Maybe, you have to take some U-turns and some course corrections but you are going to get exactly where you are meant to get to.

Where you are meant to get to, is that always where you envisioned it?

It’s not, and that’s the exciting part. When you surrender, let go and say, “I know I’m on this journey, and here’s my destination that I want to get to,” but the process of letting go and understanding that the universe wants more for you than you even know what’s possible, and you let yourself weave through that journey, you end up in the most fascinating places.

When my children were 8 and 11, I took them out of school and traveled for a year. We went to 11 countries in 12 months, and all we did was raise money for charity. We’ve always got on the wrong bus, ended up in the wrong place, and met different people in the times but the thing is what was so fascinating was, we always ended up meeting the right imperfect people, taking the right imperfect detour, and ending up in the right and perfect place.

When we look back on it, it was so beautiful and magical. That has led to my publishing house, where I help people tell those amazing stories of those pivotal moments in their life, where at one point, it could have felt like the worst moment ever. You were down on your knees and knocked upside the head but the truth is, in hindsight, it was the silver lining. It was the golden nugget. It was the path you were meant to take, and by looking at it in hindsight and reassigning meaning to it, you now tell the story in a way that benefits others, and it makes a difference for people.

[bctt tweet=”Let go and understand that the universe wants more for you than you even know what’s possible.” via=”no”]

What got you into writing? What was the moment that you said, “I’ve got to write a book?”

I was a latchkey kid when I grew up. My mom was a very successful businesswoman, and I would take the bus from school to her office, and then I would sit in her office and wait for her to finish work until I could go home with her. Her secretary would always leave, so I would sit and plunk away on her secretary’s typewriter and write, “The woe is me of JB, having to sit here being a latchkey kid and not being able to go home. It’s 7:00 PM, and I still haven’t eaten.” I would pour out my mid junior high angst on my mom’s secretary’s typewriter but I always loved story writing because it was an opportunity for me to escape into fantasy. It allowed me to think of things that had never been done before.

I will tell you that after my successful kids’ clothing company, I did crash and burn. I did go through that very difficult time of reassigning my meaning entirely, and to your point, why was I doing what I was doing. I would go to China 5 to 6 times a year. I would spend 20 to 25 days in Asia away from my kids. I remember coming home eight days before Christmas. I had been gone for three weeks. No one was there to pick me up at the airport. I took a taxi to my house.

When I opened the door, I could hear my kids laughing with the nanny. They were 3 and 5 at the time. I was jealous that they were having fun with the nanny, and instead of saying hello to them, I snuck up to the guest room, which I had been sleeping in for two years because my husband and I weren’t getting along, and I convinced myself it was okay to go to bed that night without seeing my kids. I was like, “Mommy has been on a thirteen-hour flight. She will see them in the morning.”

In the middle of the night, my daughter woke up in her crib, and she started calling the nanny’s name. I knew right there and then that every single thing in my life had to change, including my why. Why was I making kids’ clothes? Why was I running around the world talking about kids’ clothing, health for kids, and functional clothing for kids, and my own kids wouldn’t even call me in the middle of the night?

My why completely shifted, and I went on a two-year sabbatical. I closed my business 90 days after that moment. I sold everything and walked away. I left $780,000 worth of stock in a warehouse. I took my van and my kids. I left my marriage. I started over. I started completely redefining my why. Why was I doing what I was doing? That was probably day one of the road to the JB that you see now.

What was that like? What did you do to rebuild yourself? What did you do to get to know yourself? How did you redevelop JB?

I will be honest. It’s truly so simple. Know thyself. I went deep within. I did meditate. I went to Sedona. I went in silent retreats. I did all kinds of health practitioners. I did Reiki. I tried everything. I tried drawing myself in circles, painting, dancing, sleeping, and writing. I went through every single thing. What did I like? What didn’t I like? What was interesting to me? What was important to me? Everybody was doing this but I didn’t think that was cool. Everybody thought this was amazing but that wasn’t for me.

I started discovering what I liked. What is my currency of success? As a businesswoman, for many years, I was dialed into what was important to men. I thought, “This is successful.” It was the corporate office, the corner room, and the briefcase. I had to define what success was to me, a woman in my 40s, 2 kids, this experience, and living in this town. What was my currency of success? I went into a deep introspection of me and finding out about me, getting to know me, loving me, understanding me, and then accepting why I do what it is I do.

BYW S4 13 | Ignite Lives
Ignite Lives: Let people know that it’s okay to do what’s proven to be successful so they feel the greatest version of themselves.

 

What did you find as your currency of success?

I love showing people that it’s possible. My currency of success is that if I can do it, you can do it, and if I’ve got to do it first to show you that it’s possible, I’m going to do the work. I love doing the work. I love putting in the grind. I love going after it. I love dissecting what’s done and how do we do it better. I felt that if I could be me 100%, show up in total authenticity, tell my story to the world, and let people know that it’s okay to do exactly the same thing so that they feel the greatest version of themselves, that was my mission. That was what I was going to get passionate about.

I have been doing it for the last couple of years, and I love it. I have the best job in the world. I love waking up every day, throwing back the covers at 4:00 AM, and getting going. People think it’s crazy but I love it because I believe that we are a mirror for the people closest to us and from a distance. If we can be a mirror for them to see what’s possible in them, if we can be the catalyst or if we can inspire them in a way that they haven’t seen before by us being our authentic selves, that will create a big and massive shift.

Me being the fake JB, the businesswoman JB or the power version of a female business owner, that was all a stereotype. That was all something that was planted as a seed in me instead of me being authentically me. It takes so much less work and effort to be yourself. You don’t have to think as much. You get to be you and show up as you. It’s way more fun. As a Gemini and as a person who loves the better way, it’s got to be fun or I’m not doing it.

I’m a Gemini in a better way, too. Let me see if this resonates with you because I love what you said, “If I can do it, you can do it because I believe that top,” but I will also add to that. If they can do it, I can do it, and if I can do it, you can do it, because I will see somebody doing that and be like, “If they can do this, then I’m sure I can do it.” Do you notice that as well?

There are so many people out there doing amazing things, and they inspire me. What you have done has inspired me. Your program and your protocol have inspired me. That’s the lifting of the lid that we all have to go through. It’s that it is possible. There is another option. There are other ways of doing it, and when we surround ourselves with people who are challenging that, it lifts our lid and allows us to see things that maybe we didn’t see before from our past conditioning.

I will never be the JB I am now if I kept being the JB that was born in a small town. We often root ourselves in our stories. We can’t do this because of where we came from, who our parents were, we aren’t smart enough, thin enough or rich enough. That story goes with us as we travel through our lives. It isn’t until we tell our story and see it from that bird’s-eye view or from that new updated version. The new version of JB is not necessarily the version of JB that left this town but I have returned to this town.

My mom had a stroke, so I’m back here, and then COVID has kept me here. Interestingly, I sometimes bump into some schoolmates, some friends or people of my parent’s friends who know me. They still think I’m that same person, and I have to chuckle because it is hard sometimes for people to see you for who you really are.

I was reading in some of your notes. You said, “What’s the best advice anyone has ever given or you have given?” For me, it’s always to be who you want to be known for. Be the person you want to be known for. When my son came here, he was starting a new school. He was like, “I’m nervous about starting school tomorrow,” and I said, “What are you nervous about?” He’s like, “I don’t know if the kids are going to like me. I don’t know what everyone is going to think.”

[bctt tweet=”Be the person you want to be known for. ” via=”no”]

I said, “Why don’t you be you? Be you and be the person you want to be known for. If you want to be known for the class clown, be that. If you want to be known for the athlete, be that. If you want to be known for the intellect, be that but be who you want to be known for. Don’t be who you think they think you are and don’t be who you think you think you should be. Be who you want to be known for. If you want to be known for you, then be that.”

That’s the best advice that I have been able to give anyone, and I try to live it every day. Whenever I struggle with a choice, it’s like, “What do I want to be known for? Do I want to be known as the person who made this decision or this decision? Do I want to be known as the person who runs this business or lives this life? What do I want to be known for?” That allows us to step into our greater version of ourselves.

I was listening to a speech by Steve Jobs, and in it, he says, “You cannot connect the dots looking forward. You can only connect the dots looking backward.” That’s what you were talking about. You don’t know where you are going to end up. I wonder if that’s a Better Way thing because I feel the same way. I have an idea of where I want to go but along the way, who knows where we are going to end up?

I doubt that I’m going to end up where I thought I was going but it’s going to be a fun journey along the way, and then when I get there, I can look back and connect the dots like, “That’s why I talked to this person, saw this, missed that flight, did this, and all those other things.” You can only connect the dots looking back and not looking forward. Does that make sense?

Yes, and it’s so true. We don’t know what the masters haven’t worked for us. I was writing. I’m doing a new book called Wisdom for the Back of a Bike, and it’s about my cycle ride. We had a plan to get to the other side of Canada to dip our toe in the Atlantic Ocean, and of course, COVID stopped us along the way because they were not letting people into the Atlantic provinces with the Atlantic bubble. We looped around Canada and ended up being at the parliament building. We decided we were going to make the Parliament Buildings in Ottawa be our final destination. That was going to be our 5,000 kilometers. It was a beautiful experience. It was so full of accomplishment and pride.

That very day was the first time they were ever going to allow public speaking on Parliament Hill and have an open mic, so because of everything that was happening in COVID and the way that things were unfolding in politics, they decided to have an open mic first time ever on Capitol Hill in the Parliament. I threw my hand up and put my name on the list to be one of the speakers. My kids were mortified. They couldn’t believe that their mom was going to talk. I’m in my cycling gear and my cycling cleats.

I went up on stage and started to say like, “I’m JB, and I cycled 5,000 kilometers across Canada. I want to tell people that anything is possible.” It was a glorious experience because when I was eleven years old, I promised my Social Studies teacher that I would one day speak in Parliament, and then I thought, “Here we go. The universe has wrapped this whole dream around years later,” but I had no idea that not dipping my toe in the Atlantic Ocean would lead to me being on Parliament Hill speaking to thousands of people and talking about what’s possible.

What was your first book?

The very first book I wrote in 2003 was called Letters for My Mother. Interestingly enough, I had a difficult relationship with my mom when I was in my teenage years. I ended up leaving college and going to the Dominican Republic because it was about as far away as I could get from her on the cheapest ticket I could find. I lived in the Dominican for three years, and the fascinating part of that was that I thought I had everything growing up in Canada from a very affluent family but I realized I had nothing.

BYW S4 13 | Ignite Lives
Letters For My Mother

Those people in the Dominican had nothing. They lived in shacks and dirt floors but they had everything because they had their dignity, their faith, and they had each other, and they had a family. While I was away, I started writing letters to my mom to heal my relationship with her. I wrote her 200 letters over the three years. She never wrote me back but when I came home, I had such a beautiful relationship with her. I had worked through so many of my problems by writing her letters that I was inspired to write a book about how adult daughters and mothers can heal their relationships. That book is finding a better way on how you can heal a relationship. That was my first book in 2003.

How many books did you write until you decided you were going to a publishing company?

I wrote that single book, and then I wrote about four books that sat on the shelf and didn’t go to print. One day in 2018, I was sitting at a conference. There was a bunch of people up on stage telling their stories. Many of them were crying and losing their resolve because they were telling these emotional stories but the fascinating thing is when they’ve got offstage, people were hugging them, stepping out of the front row, embracing them, and welcoming them. Throughout the week at the conference, people became so close because they told their private and personal stories on stage. They became vulnerable and authentic.

I sat in the audience thinking, “We have something here. Every single person on the planet wants to be seen. Everyone has a story and deserves to be heard. If we could tell the stories in a way that showed the transformation, the growth, and the learning, we could make a difference.” No matter what color you are, what gender you are, where you live or how much is in your wallet, you can relate to the human experience of that hero’s journey between, “Do I become a victim or a villain, or do I take the hero’s journey, and I go for what’s better in my life?” That was the igniting moment where I realized I have to be the person to help people tell their stories.

I have to make a difference. The difference I’m going to make is giving everyone a platform to tell their beautiful and amazing transformational story. I, too, had a story because after I divorced my first husband, I had got into another relationship. It was very abusive, and that relationship was very short but I hid that story for a long time because I was embarrassed by it, and that hiding of that story kept me down. It held me back because I was always afraid people were going to find out that I made such a bad decision.

It wasn’t until I started telling that story that other women came out of the woodwork saying that they too had a similar experience, they could relate or that they appreciated me telling their story because it gave them the courage to tell their story. There was quite a process of me realizing how powerful storytelling is. Now 700 stories and multiple international best-selling books with the hundreds of thousands of people who have read our stories, I realize how valuable that genuine heartfelt story is and how much it changes people’s lives.

Tell us about your publishing company. What is it called, and who do you ideally like to work with?

We call it Ignite Publishing, and it is about igniting lives. I love working with people who have a mission and a message, and people who want to make an impact on others. I’m not the kind of publishing house where we put words on a page, pages in a book, and books on the shelf. We walk you through a transformational experience. As a writer, especially when you are telling your own story, you toggle between the fun, joy, struggles, pains, sorrows, and agony, and then there’s this incredibly rewarding experience at the end.

I work with people who want to tell their stories and who want to make an impact. I work with people who have a mission and have a higher purpose. They want to do something that’s going to benefit others. I strongly believe in the triple win. I win, you win, and someone else wins. Someone who reads your story wins. Someone they work with wins.

[bctt tweet=”There are incremental ways to make an impact. ” via=”no”]

The proceeds from all of our books are going towards building schools in Cambodia for underprivileged kids. The triple win is now these kids that get to find out what’s possible for them and how to step into their greatness. We did a book with Les Brown that is all about greatness and igniting the hunger in you. I’m so passionate about the fact that these children who may not know what’s possible for them or may not ever have that deep desire and passion to go after their greatness will now have an environment to do so. That’s the whole thing that Ignite is all about.

Are you looking for people that have a story but don’t know how to tell it or are you looking for people that are already established writers and are looking for a platform? Tell us more about who you are looking for.

I love those people who want a better way to get to the experience. I like people who are potentially not authors but they know they want to be authors. They are people who have a story and want to write it but they want to do it in the most efficient, practical, rewarding, enjoyable, affordable, and pleasurable way possible. I want it to be a maximum experience.

It is people who want to be a part of a community. If you are in an Ignite book, you step into a community of like-minded people. Every book has a theme, so you are with people who are of your peers, and then you use the collaboration of the peers to elevate, encourage, and create great partnerships that are going to benefit you and the whole purpose of the book.

I’m always looking for people who have a story, who want to make an impact, and who understand that there are these incremental ways to do things, and I help you get to the finish line because there are a lot of people who don’t know how to get to the finish line. It’s no different than if I wanted to fly an airplane, I would have to sit in the cockpit, and someone would have to teach me how to use the dials. That’s what we do. We do all the heavy lifting for you, and we show you how to do it. Ultimately because I want you to succeed. We show you how you can do it with your own solo book and with your books to come. I really teach you the business of being an author.

Now I’m seeing a little better. In the background behind JB are Ignite Recovery and a couple of others.

Ignite Female Leadership, Ignite Your Life for Women, and Ignite Health and Wellness.

They are a group book, so it would be like a theme, and then if you have a story about recovery, health, or different things, then you would go in that particular book with a group of other authors that are similar.

Our new book coming out is Ignite Your Wisdom, so it’s all about Ignite stories around wisdom. These are people who are thought leaders, inventors, and who are into the mindset and who have had incredible experiences where something has opened up their lid and evolved their thinking, and broke down their limiting beliefs. They are people who are in that mind space or in that marketplace, so they want to write a book that has other people doing the same thing that would attract a customer that wants the answers to that problem.

BYW S4 13 | Ignite Lives
Ignite Lives: Give everyone a platform to tell their beautiful and amazing transformational story.

 

Do we get multiple stories per book?

Yes, and action steps. Every single author puts not just their story, but then they put in the action steps that they took to get themselves there. As a better way person, I’m like, “Give me the baseline or bottom line of what do I need to do consistently every day to get myself to success,” so every single author writes their action steps at the end of their story.

If there’s somebody that’s reading and says, “I really want to connect with JB. I want to learn more about her books. I want to write a book. I want to be part of this,” what’s the best way to get in touch with you?

Come to IgniteYou.life. That’s our website. You can go there. You can always find me on Facebook and Instagram. I’m the only JB Owen. I would love for you to reach out to me directly. I’m so accessible because I believe like a magnet, all the right and perfect people come to me to tell their stories. When somebody steps into my Viewfinder or into my world, I know that they are ready and that this is their time.

They just need me to help be the midwife to move them through the process. It’s easy to find me. Go to IgniteYou.life. You can go to Amazon and see all of our books are in a series. You can reach out to us that way, and you can get our books on our website. Please reach out to me. I would love to help you share your story.

I didn’t ask you the most obvious question, and that is what does JB stand for?

It’s such a great story. It’s all I’ve got. It’s all my parents gave me when I was born in a small town. My mom was not allowed to leave the hospital without giving me a name but my dad happened to be in Mexico racing riverboats. My mom put JB on the birth certificate, thinking that when my dad came back, they would call me Julie, Barbara, or Brenda. For the whole month that he was away, they called me baby JB because they didn’t know what my name was going to be, so when my dad came home after being in Mexico, he said, “JB. That’s cool. Let’s go with that.”

Thank you so much for taking the time to be here. It has been awesome talking to you. I love what you are doing. I’m excited to read your books, and hopefully, there are people that are reading that are right in line with what you want to do, and they will connect with you because you’ve got a great mission. I’m excited for us to stay in touch as we move along.

Thank you. I would love to reward your authors. I love giving things away, so if they would DM me or send something to me and put the word, “Why,” or we talked about on this episode, I happily will send anyone a link to any one of our books so that they can read the stories and be inspired. I would love to give them a book for free so that they can enjoy it.

[bctt tweet=”Evolve your thinking and break down your limiting beliefs.” via=”no”]

Thank you for being here.

Thank you. You have been a treat to speak with. You are a blessing. I can’t wait to go forward, knowing the why so clearly. It’s beautiful.

Thank you.

It’s time for our new segment, which is Guess Their Why. For this one, I want to pick Elvis Presley. What do you think Elvis Presley’s why is? When you think about his life and the journeys that he has gone on, how he was an unknown, very successful, and then went off the deep end a little bit? He ended up a different person in a different place with a different set of struggles before he passed away.

What do you think Elvis Presley’s why is? I’m going to guess that his why is to challenge the status quo and to think differently. Even the way he danced was different. Everything about him was different. He created so many new things and brought them to the forefront of many people around the world.   He did things differently. People loved it and loved him.

What do you think his why is? I would be curious to see what you think. I want to thank you for reading. If you have not yet discovered your why reading this show, knowing your why will be so much more powerful for you. Go to WhyInstitute.com. You can use the code PODCAST50 and discover your why for half the price. If you love the show, please don’t forget to subscribe and leave us a review or rating on whatever platform you are using to tune in. Thank you so much. I will see you.

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About JB Owen

BYW S4 13 | Ignite LivesJB Owen is a world-class speaker, 17-time bestselling author, accomplished publisher, and global business owner. She is the Founder and CEO of the Ignite Publishing, the leaders in empowerment books; publishing over 700 authors to date. She owns Ignite Moments Media where she produces transformational television, inspirational content, and life-changing events.

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Podcast

Contributing Through A Mindset Of Abundance And Customer-Centric Real Estate With Brandon Brittingham

BYW 12 | Customer Centric

 

Bringing value to your business could simply mean giving value to others. Brandon Brittingham, recognized as one of the best real estate agents in America, credits a customer-centric approach as the driver of his success in the field. For him, it’s about clients over commission. He says once you provide the best value and service, the commission will work itself out. Together with Dr. Gary Sanchez, they explore Brandon’s WHY of Contribute and how he’s achieved success while positively impacting the world. Brandon also shares his mission to coach and train new real estate agents and change the industry for the better. Stay tuned to get to know more about Brandon’s purpose and vision, as well as his means in serving others.

Watch the episode here:

Listen to the podcast here:

Contributing Through A Mindset Of Abundance And Customer-Centric Real Estate With Brandon Brittingham

Welcome to the show. We go beyond just talking about your why and helping you discover and then live your why. If you’re a regular audience, you know that every episode, we talk about one of the nine why’s and then bring on somebody with that why so we can see how their why has played out in their lives. We’re going to be talking about the Why of Contribute. If this is your why then you want to be part of a greater cause something that is bigger than yourself.

You don’t necessarily want to be the face of the cause but you want to contribute to it in a meaningful way. You love to support others and relish the success that contributes to the team’s greater good. You see group victories as personal victories. You are often behind the scenes looking for ways to make the world better. You make a reliable and committed teammate and you often act as the glue that holds everyone else together. You use your time, money, energy, resources and connections to add value to other people and organizations.

In this episode, I’ve got a great guest for you. His name is Brandon Brittingham. He is one of the foremost experts on the shore in a short sale, foreclosure, investment real estate and has been recognized nationally for his achievements. Having lived on the Eastern Shore for most of his life, he is familiar with every aspect of the local communities and properties within them.

He is considered one of the leading real estate agents in the country and has won many awards for his success in real estate including Eastern Shore of Maryland’s Top Agent, 2012 NAR Class of 30 under 30 and was featured on the cover of NAR Magazine. He was named by Real Trends as one of the best real estate agents in America.

Brandon, welcome to the show.

Thank you.

For those people that are on the West or Midwest, where is Eastern Shores? What part of the Eastern Shore are you?

I’m in Maryland. I’m in between the Maryland and Delaware border. If you don’t know Maryland, that’s where Baltimore is. Washington DC is technically in Maryland. Although it’s not considered in Maryland, that’s the part of the map I’m on and then I’m on the Eastern Shore of Maryland, which is on the Coast. We’re famous for the Maryland crabs. That’s where all the good crabs come from the United States.

How close are you to Baltimore?

[bctt tweet=”Clients over commission.” username=”whyinstitute”]

From where I live, it is about two hours.

Take us through where did you grow up? How did you get on the path that you’re on? How did you get into real estate?

I lived in Maryland my entire life. I have moved around. I’ve lived in a couple of different cities like New York, Philadelphia and Florida. I have always had an interest in real estate. When I was younger, my father told me I should get into real estate because he had a construction background. When you’re younger, anything your dad tells you to do, you do the opposite. I got into real estate from wanting to invest in real estate and that’s what led me to get into it. I bought a couple of investment properties. I didn’t have the best experience and that led me to want to get my license only, honestly, to buy and represent myself and then I quickly found my calling in real estate that my purpose was to be in this business.

What about that business feels right to you? How do you view your business?

One of the things that I saw that was a challenge was when you came in as a new agent. It was like, “Go figure it out.” It’s a tough business to be in especially if you’re new so early, I figured it out that I had a different way of doing it. I was very customer-centric. I cared about my clients. I wanted to go above and beyond so I started to do well.

I then wanted to teach that method to other people because I saw that eventually, there was going to be a ceiling, then I switched my business model from being a single agent to building a team. That led us to 2020 where we were the number one team in the entire state of Maryland and we’re number five in the United States as far as homes sold. It has been a pretty cool journey. It has been pretty cool to bring people into my environment, watch them succeed and do well.

What do you mean by customer-centric versus what were other people doing? How was customer-centric any different than what everybody else says?

I can tell you from my experience when I bought a house or the first investment property. I didn’t have great communication with my agent. I almost felt like a commodity. Investment property aside, when someone buys or sells us a house, it’s a huge emotional attachment that they have. It could be their first house. It’s their dream. They saved money for it or whatever the case is.

They may have come from another country where laws are different, homeownership was out of reach, maybe or something they never thought that they could achieve. On the other side of that, people have kids. Their kids grew up there and they have all kinds of memories. This is a huge emotional attachment to purchasing and selling a house.

BYW 12 | Customer Centric
Customer Centric: Investment property aside, when someone buys or sells us a house, it’s a huge emotional attachment that they have.

 

Honestly, it’s a stressful process, especially nowadays. A lot of different industries have accelerated through tech where there’s a lot of archaic methods still used in a real estate transaction. I felt that from a customer service standpoint, my experience wasn’t the greatest and I didn’t want my customers to feel that. I wanted to be able to solve every problem I possibly could and give them the peace of mind that they didn’t have to worry or stress. That’s how I approach my business model. By doing that, we started to see tremendous growth.

You’re primarily residential real estate, right?

Yeah. I have done some commercials. I’m in property management and a couple of other verticals but I would say I spend the most time in residential.

When did you get into residential real estate?

What I’ll tell you is why I think I got a different view of it is because, in 2008, we went through a recession. From 2008 to about 2010, I spent the majority of my time trying to help people not lose their house to foreclosure so I got a different emotional attachment to doing business with people because I was helping them fight for their lives and not get put out on the street.

Prior to even that happening, I had a different model of customer service in my head and I felt like a lot of the agents that I had experienced back then didn’t have that customer-centric model. I took that and then we went into recession. I was making sure I took care of people when a lot of people ran away from foreclosures and short sales at that time. I didn’t and I helped a lot of people. On the other side of that, when the market turned, all those people that I helped became customers for life.

Take us through what that is now. What does a customer-centric real estate agent or real estate company look like? What do I get for that? What does that feel like to me?

It’s a couple of things. Number one, if you’re hiring me to sell your house, it is providing the best value I can. By that, what I mean is the best photography, best marketing, best systems, best process, best CRMs and the best team that I can put behind you. Unfortunately, there are still people in our business that do take cellphone photos and do limited marketing for your most expensive asset.

Aside from that, we’ve scaled our operation to figure out any problem. A prime example is you’re in the middle of a house transaction and home inspection comes back. There are nine things wrong with their house. Maybe, we negotiate it down to six but with the six you’re going to have to deal with whether this person buys it or another person buys it. I got a team of contractors and I’ll dispatch it. It’s a company that I own. We’ll take care of it and you won’t have any headaches.

[bctt tweet=”If you’re the best at the process and you provide the best level of service, the commission will work itself out.” username=”whyinstitute”]

I have a mini-storage/pads business because I’ve had situations where a moving company doesn’t show up or settlement day gets pushed or whatever the case is so we’ll dispatch our team to do that. We’re in the construction business so we can build people’s houses and again, do repairs or if anything like that comes up.

We try to take every single piece of the home transaction and control it because another thing that was a big deal to me was there were times in my real estate career where there was a part of the transaction that I couldn’t control went wrong and I couldn’t fix it. You, as a consumer, that’s all you remembered. You knew it wasn’t my fault but that was the pain that you felt. When you went to go buy or sell again, you had this nightmare or still to this pain. What I tried to do was get rid of the pain in every transaction.

A lot of that has to do with communication too and being in constant communication with you as to what’s going on throughout the transaction then ultimately, at the end of the day, it’s about looking out for your best interest where I would be like, “You’re the customer. It’s your choice but in my opinion, I don’t think this is the best offer. I think we can get a better offer.” On the flip side, “I think this is a good offer and if you let this one go, I don’t know that I’ll get you one as good.”

One of the core values in my business is clients over a commission. To sum all that up, it is how I can provide you the best value and give you the best service that’s not attached to the outcome of my commission because if I’m the best of the process and I provide you the best level of service, the commission will work itself out. If I do a good job for you, you’re going to tell people. I don’t want to paint everybody with the same brush but you probably didn’t have the same experience that you’ll have with us with other people.

I can tell you from my own experiences that that’s a different process. You’re covering all the bases that could come up to make sure that the transaction goes through, which is what both you and I want.

You as a homeowner and especially in these times, there are so many companies that are out there that control the ecosystem in products. There are so many things you have to think about when you have to buy and sell a house. Frankly, it’s stressful. You have a life and you don’t do this all the time so then you’re like, “I got to figure out a mortgage, this title, insurance, and moving. What if something goes wrong?” all those kinds of things. We tried to figure out how to take the pain away from you and give you peace of mind and we built companies around doing that.

For those of you that are reading, before we started the show, I had Brandon go through and discover his how and his what. He’s got his why, how and what. Brandon’s why is what we talked about. It was to contribute. You can hear it in everything that he says. He wants to have an impact. He wants to make a difference for people. How he does that was finding better ways and then his what was simplify. His why is to contribute to a greater cause. How he does that is by finding better ways to help them move forward and ultimately, what he brings is a simple solution where he makes it easier for them to get things done.

That comes out loud and clear when we learn your story. You want to be the one that makes a difference for them and helps them have an impact. Now, you found so many better ways to do it that other people didn’t think about or maybe they did but didn’t take the initiative to and then you simplified the whole process so that if anything goes wrong, you’ll have an answer.

I think at our core, we crave human connection. Look at what we went through with COVID. I don’t know about you but the first time I was around people again, I think the first thing I said for about 45 minutes was, “It’s good to be around people again.” For me, I don’t look at a customer as a transaction. I look at that as a relationship and what kind of deposits I am making for this long-term relationship.

BYW 12 | Customer Centric
Customer Centric: To sum all that up, it is how to provide the best value and give the best service that’s not attached to the outcome of a commission.

 

I’ll tell you another thing we do that’s very different. Every single person that we’ve ever sold a house to, we send them four gifts outside of holiday gifts. We send them four kinds of personalized, curated gifts every year to try to stay and have that connection with them because it is a big deal to me. The thing about it is when you come to m and you want to buy and sell a house, it’s typically because of a life event. It’s not a transaction.

“My wife got a job, my wife is pregnant or I got a job out of town.” On the flip side, mom and dad passed away. Whatever it is, there’s a life event. For me, I want to know why you’re selling because it gives me the ability to figure out how I can help you best and then I want to understand the pain that I got to move you away from.

For me, I get close with my clients and I have a real connection with my clients. I think that that’s why we’ve grown. I’ve ingrained that into my team because I think depositing into relationships long-term makes a huge difference. I’ve had several clients of mine end up coming to work for me or become really close friends of mine so we look at it differently that way. The most rewarding thing for me that I can’t put value or money on is when you impact someone’s life in a positive way.

A case in point, I hear in a transaction something like, “I’ve never been to a Baltimore Ravens game. I’d always want to do that,” and at settlement, I give them tickets to the Baltimore Ravens game. It’s not wonky or because I want them to refer me business. I want to make an impact on your life and I want to create a memory point for you. Real estate is just the vehicle and I’ve been fortunate enough to get those connections over the years because of my real estate business.

I know you’ve been in this business since 2007 and you’ve built it quite significantly so what’s next for you? Where do you want to go next? What are some of the things that are on the horizon for you?

COVID put a damper on this but I had started to speak nationally and on stages, not just real estate but business building, inspiration and getting people to find their true greatness and the true champion that’s inside them. Because of what I’ve done in real estate, I’ve gotten into coaching, masterminds and things of that nature. I got a book coming out end of 2021 or the first quarter of 2022. My goal is to impact as many people’s lives as I can and it’s easier to do that when you get on stage or through the internet now, where we can do a group coaching session with several hundred people. To me, that’s pretty cool.

It’s pretty cool when you get people that after something you said, a coaching session or speaking on stage saying, “This part of your presentation or this thing that you said changed the trajectory.” Not to get super negative but I’ve had a couple of people tell me, “I watched your presentation when I was contemplating suicide and this one specific thing that you said or how you said it changed my mind.” I’ve connected with people that way.

One of the best feelings in the world is when I’m speaking on stage and I can see the change in somebody. I can see it in their face and their eyes and then getting that connection afterward. That’s another cool thing that I’m working on aside from building all the companies continually through customer experience and bringing people into my environment and changing their lives.

Do you take people that are not in real estate and teach them how to do real estate?

[bctt tweet=”The most rewarding thing that you can’t put value or money on is when you impact someone’s life in a positive way.” username=”whyinstitute”]

That’s 100% what we love to do because I can come in and teach them and train them my way, which is very different than the industry. They’re easier to mold because we do things a lot differently and even people without sales experience. We bring them into our environment and it works out really well.

Do you think that people at the top of the real estate industry do things similarly?

Yes, I do.

I’ve had two other top-of-the-industry residential realtors on the show and you three sound similar. You’re in different parts of the country and do your own few things but maybe 90% of you all do the same and 10% you have your special sauce.

What’s cool about that is we’re all friends too. There’s a conglomerate of us that are at our perspective production and typically, we’re all friends and hanging out in the same rooms.

I could see that because, in order to get there, you had to do a certain amount of things really well and then you got your other little local flavor things that maybe somebody here couldn’t do. That’s neat. If you had to narrow it to one thing that has been the secret to your success from going in and from starting to the top of the food chain, what’s that one thing been?

It’s thinking in abundance.

What do you mean?

We are trained over time to think in scarcity and think about ourselves and not think in abundance. I’ll give you an anecdote from our industry. A lot of people won’t go to the stage and tell people their playbook of how they run their business. I will because I think in abundance. I don’t think of scarcity. If I think in scarcity or if I give away my secrets someone is going to compete with me. I think of it the opposite way. I’ve spoken before and someone in that stage came to work for me or by putting that message out, I found another customer or someone found me through something I did on the internet by giving out free information.

BYW 12 | Customer Centric
Customer Centric: Don’t look at a customer as a transaction. Look at that as a relationship.

 

Leading with value is thinking in abundance. Thinking in scarcity is I have to get something and I’m transactional. When I stopped thinking about myself and when I started thinking globally of how I could help more people, that’s when a lot of things changed. The other thing too is when you think of scarcity, everything is a destination. What I mean by that is when you think in scarcity, you think that a certain amount of money is enough or a certain status or thing is your destination.

When you think in abundance, your destination is being the best version of yourself at all times and that is I’m always thinking of abundance because I know that I can get better and I can make people’s lives around me better. When you think of scarcity, you think that if I have this amount of money or if I have these things, I’ll be happy. When I thought of scarcity and I achieved certain things, I still had a hole so then I’m trying to chase the next thing. When I switched to if I could concentrate on being the best version of myself every day and then implementing that on the people around me and stay in that abundance mindset, that’s when a lot of things changed for me.

How did you come to that realization? What happened that said, “Maybe you’re on the wrong path. Maybe this other path is better.” What was that moment?

I think a big influence on me was my grandparents. My grandfather, who’s now passed away and my grandmother is still alive. My grandparents didn’t have very much and were very poor. I was very fortunate and lucky enough to buy them a house and put them in a new house before my grandfather passed away. My grandfather had a heart attack in his mid-30s and he was told that if he lived to 50, it would be a miracle. He lived until 83 or 84 and they said the whole time he was a medical mystery because I can’t tell you how many open-heart surgeries and strokes he had. He had a pacemaker and he was diabetic. Whatever you can imagine, he had wrong with him.

He always had this mindset of doing for others. It’s always this positive mindset. As I got older and I understood what was keeping him alive, it was by far his mind because he had lost control of physically where he was. I remember that my grandparents were super poor and if they had $20 in their pocket, they would give it to somebody off the street. His happiness and will to live kept him alive for so long. My grandfather’s quality of life is 100% based on how he thinks and that kept him alive for so long. That was one of the things that changed for me.

Early in my career, my main goal was to put my grandparents in a house so that he could enjoy the rest of his life in a brand-new house. I can’t tell you memory-wise what exact year that was but I think that was the connection of, “You have this guy who’s been through it but he can’t get beat down mentally. He’s living the best life he can because that’s where he’s at mentally.” That was the connection that I made.

Did that allow you to see from scarcity into abundance?

100%.

I work out a couple of days a week with a friend of mine who’s the top commercial real estate guy here in New Mexico and almost to a word, he said exactly what you said there. It’s really interesting. He said, “I used to be upset when I would bring somebody in and train them and then they would leave and go start their own and compete with me. That upset me to no end. I gave him all my secrets. I gave him all my stuff.” When he switched it to abundance and continued to help them, mentor them, teach them and show them because there’s enough for all of us. He said it brought him so much joy and happiness that it was worth more than anything that he could have ever made off of them monetarily.

[bctt tweet=”Leading with value is thinking in abundance.” username=”whyinstitute”]

The pie is always bigger. If you think in scarcity, you think that if you give up a piece, you’re giving up something when the pie is bigger than we all really think it is.

You are already coaching and mentoring masterminds with other real estate agents. Where would you like to take that? What do you see coming for you in that area? It seems like everything you’re touching now is going great for you and you’re going to expand out and show other people what you did. Where would you like that to go?

If we could impact a couple of thousand real estate agents and show them how we’ve done it and there’s a better way. Also, impart on them how we do it so that it changes the consumer’s mindset of our real estate agents’ value as well. I want to put a dent in the industry and make our industry better. It’s to teach people how to do the transaction better but also help fulfill their lives by teaching them how to do everything the right way. I’d like to impact as many people as I can doing that.

One of the things that Paul Allen, who started Ancestry.com, told me one day, I asked him, “What was the best piece of advice you’ve ever been given?” He said, “The best piece of advice I was ever given was to not take advice from people that don’t think as I do.”

That’s a good one.

That popped into my head as you and I have been talking here because what you say would resonate well with somebody who has your why but it may not resonate very well with somebody who doesn’t. Somebody who has the why of contribute will listen to you and say, “That’s exactly what I’ve been looking for and what I want. Give me more,” but some of the other whys might listen and say, “That sounds good but that’s not me. That’s not what I’m trying to do.” It’ll be interesting as you go along to see which ones take off with your advice and which ones say, “That was nice but I’m doing my own thing.” That makes a lot of sense to me. I’m wondering if that is something I would have energy for like you do.

I can tell you that I’ve brought some nonbelievers and converted them.

That’s awesome. If people that are reading this, real estate agents or not, want to connect with you to go through your course or work with you, be mentored by you or have you come to speak at their event, what’s the best way for them to get ahold of you?

The best way is honestly Facebook Messenger because I get so many emails, phone calls and all that crazy stuff. Rather than send people to the website, I really like to connect with people and I don’t mind it. I have a whole team that helps me in case I can’t get to somebody. It’s Brandon Brittingham. Find me on Facebook. Shoot me a message. You’ll find all my stuff from there but whatever specifically we can connect you with or help you with, that’s the easiest way to get to me.

BYW 12 | Customer Centric
Customer Centric: The pie is always bigger. If you think in scarcity, you think that if you give up a piece, you’re giving up something when the pie is bigger than we all really think it is.

 

Brandon, it has been awesome having you on. Thanks for taking the time away from you. I’m sure you have a busy day every day. I’ve enjoyed our conversation.

Thank you for having me.

It’s time for our new segment, which is Guess The WHY. I’m going to go with somebody I’m not sure about this one and I would love your help with it. I’m going to talk about Bruno Mars. I love Bruno Mars. I love his music, his energy, his story, where he came from and how far he has come. Many of his songs are hits. What do you think his why is?

I’m going to take a stab at his why. I think it’s going to end up being trust. Creating relationships based upon trust is Bruno Mars’ why and that’s just a total feeling. I don’t know for sure. If you know Bruno Mars, connect him with me but I have that feeling that he’s somebody that when he was really young had his trust broken and some of his songs are about that. The feeling that I get when I see him leads me towards trust. What do you think his why is? That’s where I’m at.

Thank you for reading. If you have not yet discovered your why, you can do so at WhyInstitute.com. You can use the code PODCAST50 and discover your why at half the price. If you love the show, please don’t forget to subscribe below and leave us a review and rating on whatever platform you’re using to tune it to our show because our vision is to be the first step that people take when they’re trying to figure out who they are. Like the start here button and we want to be able to impact a billion people in the next five years so giving us a great rating would sure help out. I will see you in the next episode. Have a great week.

Important Links:

About Brandon Brittingham

BYW 12 | Customer CentricBrandon is one of the foremost experts on the shore in Short sale/Foreclosure and investment real estate, and has been recognized nationally for his acheivements. Having lived on the Eastern Shore for most of his life, he is familiar with every aspect of the local communities and the properties within them.
He is considered one of the leading real estate agents in the Country and has one many awards for his success in real estate including :
-Eastern shore of Maryland’s Top Agent units Sold 4 years in a row
-2012 NAR class of 30 under 30, was on the Cover of NAR Magazine.
-Named by Real Trends as one of the “best real estate agents in America for 2013”
Categories
Podcast

Ignite The Hunger In You: How To Develop Your Greatness And Ignite Humanity With Les Brown!

BYW S4 11 | Developing Greatness

Every single one of us holds unfathomable greatness waiting to be unleashed. It all comes down to igniting the hunger within you to develop that greatness. Who better to teach you how than the Great, Les Brown himself! Les is one of the world’s most renowned motivational speakers and a sought-after coach, personality, and resource. He chats with Dr. Gary Sanchez for a deep dive on the inspiration of his latest book, Ignite the Hunger in You: How to Develop Your Greatness and Ignite Humanity. In their talk, Les discusses his anecdotes of people and events that helped ignite the hunger in him and how he aims to inspire personal growth to many more. Listen to their moving discussion on achieving that greatness and passing it forward to ignite humanity.

Watch the episode here:

Listen to the podcast here:

Ignite The Hunger In You: How To Develop Your Greatness And Ignite Humanity With Les Brown!

Welcome to the show, where we go beyond talking about your why and helping you discover and live your why. If you’re a regular reader, you know that every week we talk about 1 of the 9 whys and bring on somebody with that why so you can see how their why has played out in their life. We are going to do something different and something that we have never done before. Usually, what we do is we reveal our guest’s why before the interview, and then you get to hear their stories about how their why has played out in their life. We are going to do the reverse. The reason we’re doing that is so many of you already know our guest.

You have heard him for many years and experienced his presence and talks. I will be interviewing him. I want you to read and figure out what his why is from the stories that he tells. We will reveal his why online to see how you did. Read and try to decipher his why. We have a very special guest for you. I have been looking forward to interviewing this guest for many years. I have been trying to get him on the show but things didn’t work out at certain times.

For a man who needs little to no introduction as one of the world’s most renowned motivational speakers, and one of the most highly sought-after resources in business and professional circles for Fortune 500 CEOs, small business owners, nonprofits and community leaders looking to expand opportunity. His charisma, warmth and humor have transformed ordinary people into extraordinary achievers by using his own life and in-depth study of others’ challenges to build an understanding of what works, what doesn’t work and why.

He never tires from energizing people to meet the challenges of the world around them. He has a way of turning what he touches into gold. He is here to talk about the book he co-wrote with JB Owen called Ignite the Hunger in You: How to Develop Your Greatness and Ignite Humanity. Les Brown, welcome to the show.

Thank you very much. I appreciate the opportunity to be here and spend some time with you. I want to congratulate you on the work you’re doing, helping people to discover their why, and giving enlightenment on what can help to sustain people in very challenging times. Nietzsche said, “If you know the why for living, you can endure almost anyhow.”

As we are going through this pandemic, we felt that it was about to be something of the past, and now there’s a new one out there. People need something that can sustain them. Their why will be their rod and staff to comfort them, to give them the wherewithal, the perseverance, and the courage to keep moving forward and do the things that they are called to do. What you’re doing and the work that you have is a calling. It’s needed now more than ever before in this place where we are.

Thank you, Les. I appreciate that. There are very few readers who don’t know you or your story, but for those that don’t, could you take us back in your life? Where were you born? What was it like when you grew up? How did you transition from where you were to where you are now, speaking all over the world to millions of people? Take us through the quick version of Les Brown’s life.

[bctt tweet=”We learn from our conversations, observations, experiences, and circumstances.” username=”whyinstitute”]

I’ll give you the Reader’s Digest version. I was born in a poor section of Miami, Florida called Liberty City, with a twin brother. We were born in an abandoned building on a floor. We were taken in as foster kids by Mamie Brown. I feel like Abraham Lincoln who said, “All that I have and all that I ever hoped to be, I owe to my mother.” I constantly say that God took me out of my biological mother’s womb and placed me in the heart of my adopted mother. I saw a picture of my birth mother and father, and connected with the birth family that I had no idea. I’m in Atlanta and they live in Gainesville, Georgia, and here I am an hour away. I always felt a connection with Atlanta.

I know the moment that my birth mother, Dorothy Rucker, came to see me. I remember I was on a book tour and this lady was watching me very intensely. It was her and a guy. She came forward and said, “Hold your hand out, son.” I held my hand out and she put a picture, closed my hand and walked away. I put the picture in my pocket and then something said, “Take it out.” I looked at it and it was a picture of my brother and me. I said, “Lady, where did you get this from?” She just turned around, waved and kept walking. That was a brief moment, and then here we are. My son did a search. He went on to find and locate my birth family. It has been a process. I’m just now discovering my roots.

What has got me here? I always say, “I’ve got a new narrative.” My birth mother gave me life. My adopted mother taught me how to live life. When I was in the 5th grade, I was labeled educable mentally retarded. I was put back from the 5th grade to the 4th grade, and failed again when I was in the 8th grade. I had a high school teacher like you in my junior year. He’s very much like your personality. He was the kind of person who always look for the good and bring out the best in people. That’s who you are and how you show up.

He said, “Young man, go to the board and work this problem out for me.” I said, “Sir, I can’t do that.” He said, “Why not?” I said, “I’m not one of your students.” He said, “Do what I’m asking you to do anyhow.” The other students started laughing and saying, “He’s Leslie. He’s got a twin brother, Wesley. Wesley is smart. He’s DT.” He asked, “What’s DT?” “He’s the Dumb Twin.” I said, “I am, sir.” As they laughed at me, he came from behind his desk and looked at me. He said, “Don’t you ever say that again. Someone’s opinion of you does not have to become your reality. Do you hear me?” I said, “Yes, sir.”

The program that you host does something for people. How people live their lives is a result of the story they believe about themselves. What you do in promoting people discovering their why, you distract, dispute and inspire. You distract them from their current self-explanatory style as psychologists would call. Through your guests and conversations, you dismantle their belief system on how they see themselves and how they are showing up in life. You give them the courage to ignite a spirit of becoming an active force in their lives, to take their lives in another direction, to live a life that has meaning and purpose, and a life that will outlive them. Thank you for how you show up.

Thank you. When you were in high school, you had a label. How did you remove that label from yourself? How long did that take? What was that like for you?

It’s an ongoing process. Even now, I don’t think that you just have a moment, and you’re able to disrupt the things that you have embraced about yourself. As you are aware, we learn from conversations, observations, experiences and circumstances that we have. I came along during a time when they had signs on Miami Beach, “Jews, dogs and coloreds, not allowed.” There were places on Miami Beach where I couldn’t go that a dog could go. That’s a dominant culture that’s designed to destroy a person’s sense of self.

BYW S4 11 | Developing Greatness
Ignite the Hunger in You: How to Develop Your Greatness and Ignite Humanity

That’s an ongoing process. What I learned from going to work with my mother, and she worked for wealthy families on Miami Beach is what you listen to, you turn into. She worked for this wealthy family, the Swiderski family. Mr. Swiderski, I had to clean his office. He listened to motivational messages regularly. Zig Ziglar, “If you give enough people what they want, they will give you what you want.” Earl Nightingale, “You don’t get in life what you want. You get in life what you are.” Dr. Norman Vincent Peale, “You have something special. Don’t allow negative thoughts to dominate your life. You must think positively.” By listening to those messages regularly, unbeknownst to me, it was interrupting my vision of myself. It gave me a vision of myself beyond my mental conditioning and circumstances. It created a hunger for more and to live a greater life outside of what society said that was available to me.

As you speak around the world and meet people that have transformed their lives, what part does personal growth play in the changes that you have seen in people around the world?

Personal growth is everything. There’s a quote that Bishop TD Jakes says, “Lord, don’t let my talents take me where my character can’t keep me.” It’s self-awareness, knowing who you are, and being willing to work on yourself continuously. That discovery process empowers you because life is full of disruptions. Things are going to happen that you never saw coming as what happened with the pandemic. We never saw this coming. It’s to be able to define yourself and don’t allow the disruptions of life and the things that happen to you to disrupt how you feel about yourself and how you see life.

There’s something that LC Robinson said, “Things may happen around you, and things may happen to you but the only things that count are the things that happen in you.” It’s being anchored in a mindset of mental resolve that, “This will not define me. It will refine me but it’s not going to define me.” I’m looking at this from the perspective of not, “Why did this happen to me?” but from the perspective of, “What do I do with this? Now the power is in my hands. How am I going to handle this?”

The self-awareness and the ongoing process of working on yourself are meaningful. Abraham Lincoln said, “If I had six hours to chop a tree down, I’ll spend four hours sharpening my ax.” That’s what people have to do. The divorce rate is up 40%. The suicide rate has increased dramatically. Unexplained violence is taking place all over the country. Millions of people have been told, “You don’t have to come to work. You can do it from home.” They then say, “It’s safe now. You can come to work.” People say, “I don’t know if I want to do that anymore,” because they had time to rethink their lives.

We’re going through a place where people are reflecting and making decisions. We make decisions and our decisions make us. That’s different from what we have been able to see in the past. We have a culture that trains and educates people to be employees. Now, there are people saying, “I want to be my own boss, control my destiny, and live life on my terms.” This place where we are is very special.

That’s a good way to put it. Let’s keep going. You are now a young boy, and you have learned about personal growth. How did that translate into the changes that you made in your life? How did that take place?

[bctt tweet=”Define yourself and don’t allow the disruptions of life and the things that happen to you to disrupt how you feel about yourself and how you see life.” username=”whyinstitute”]

What it caused me to do is to continue to pursue listening to messages that would empower me and inspire me, that expand my vision of what’s possible in my life in spite of being in a culture that demonizes you, works to destroy your sense of self, and dismiss you. It helped to fortify my drive and hunger to want to live a larger life beyond my mental conditioning, and the circumstances where I found myself. It’s that process and I’m still engaged in it. I believe you’re never too old to learn and you’re never too young to teach. I’m always learning and studying.

I left on my telephone a message for people who call me. There are people who call to hear what the message will be and it’s, “Most people have dreams and goals that die between two thieves, regret of the past and fear of the future.” You have a gift. Don’t let the regrets of the past, the mistakes that you have made in the past, the things that you have gone through, the fear of failure, and the fear of what’s going on rob you of why you were here and the work that you are supposed to do.

What were you like in high school? Where did that take you in your life to get into speaking? You have been speaking for how many years?

Fifty-two years. That’s before you were born. I thought of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr, Abbott, Malcolm X, and Billy Graham speaking to people in a big stadium. I was fascinated with their oratorical skills. My high school teacher, Mr. LeRoy Washington, was a Speech and Drama teacher and he was awesome, “You have something special. You have greatness in you. You have the ability to do more than you can even begin to imagine. You can make your school proud. Booker T Washington High School is not the largest but the best. You can make your family proud.”

I remember following him after school after he gave a speech and I said, “Mr. Washington, I heard your speech.” He said, “Aren’t you in the eleventh grade? I said, “Yes, sir.” “That was for the seniors.” I said, “I know but I heard your voice and I felt like you were talking to me. I came and stood in the back and listened. You said that we have something special and great in us. Do I have greatness in me?” He said, “Yes.” I say, “How do you explain the fact that I have to go to summer school every year, that I have been labeled educable mentally retarded, and my twin brother gets As and Bs. I have never gotten that. He has been on the honor roll. That has never happened for me.”

He said, “Mr. Brown, your grades don’t determine who you are. It just means that you have to work harder.” When he turned to walk away, I said, “Sir, I want to make my mother proud. I want to buy my mother a home. You said that if one person heard you that you’re being brought here from Stuart, Florida to Miami in Liberty City, you being brought here would not have been in vain.” He said, “Yes.” I said, “I’m the one, sir. I heard you. I’m going to use what you said.” He said, “It’s possible, young man.” He turned to walk away.

I said, “Don’t forget me. My name is Leslie Brown. I’m Mamie’s boy. One day, you’re going to hear my name. I’m the one. You touched me. When you spoke, you spoke to my heart.” That journey and that transformative experience created an opening in my mind that it was possible, that I didn’t have to die on the streets of Liberty City in Overtown in a violent and drug-infested poverty area. I can see the world before I leave the world, and that I can make some choices that will liberate me to become a person of substance and live a life of impact and live a life that’s counted.

BYW S4 11 | Developing Greatness
Developing Greatness: The self-awareness and the ongoing process of working on yourself are meaningful.

Do you have any idea of how many speeches and presentations you have given?

No. I gave a speech that a lot of people love called It’s Not Over Until You Win in the Georgia Dome, which no longer exists. It was before 80,000 people. I don’t even remember giving the speech because I was so afraid. I went to the bathroom about 6 to 7 times. They had to get me out of there. I said, “Have you looked out there?” No, I don’t. I have been doing it for so long. I enjoy doing it virtually now. We have gone from brick-and-mortar to click-and-order. I’m training people how to take their story, knowledge, and skills, and how to train others and do it virtually in front of the computer like how we’re speaking now.

I do miss speaking on stage but not that much. I enjoy speaking in front of the computer because I know how to connect with people in front of them or in front of the computer. That’s what I now specialize in. I don’t have to get on an airplane and fly from city to city or country to country, and be able to create an experience. Oliver Wendell Holmes said, “Once a man’s mind has been expanded with an idea of concept or experience, it can never be satisfied to going back to where it was.”

I have listened to many of your speeches and worked out many times listening to you. I am enthralled with the way you tell stories and speak. How did you learn to do that? When did you learn to do that? What is it that you’re actually doing so that I know what it is?

Let me say how I learned. I had a coach. Mike Williams wrote a book called The Road to Your Best Stuff. He has an addition to that, The Road to Your Best Stuff 2.0. I saw him speak and I admired his style of speaking, how he had the audience on the edge of their seats, and how to have them laughing and the next moment crying. I went to him and said, “Can you teach me how to do that?” He said, “I could teach you how to do better than that.” That’s how I got here. He’s still my coach to this day. The other thing is that when you love something and see it as your calling, a job is what you get paid for. A calling is what you’re made for.

I talked to a young man and I said, “What are you doing?” He told me that he was in IT. I asked him, “What are you living to do?” He thought for a moment and said, “I love to help people.” I said, “Do you find yourself doing that in what you are now doing?” He said, “Not to the extent that I want.” I said, “You ought to create that for yourself before you leave here. We don’t know how much time we have left.” He said, “I got to pay the bills.” I said, “We’ll figure out how you can pay the bills and build a life that’s you. Life is short and unpredictable.”

If there’s anything we learned from this pandemic, people are rethinking their lives. Life is fragile. Over 700,000 people are out of here. You owe it to yourself and your family to do something that’s you and that you love so much that you do it for nothing, but you do it so well that people will pay you to do it. I said, “That’s how I got into this.” I volunteered. I gave free speeches for a long time to learn how to do what I was doing. I invested in myself. Warren Buffett said, “The most important investment you can make is in yourself.” Here’s a guy who has billions of dollars in real estate and the stock market but he said, “In yourself.”

[bctt tweet=”Most people have dreams and goals that die between two thieves – regret of the past and fear of the future.” username=”whyinstitute”]

He said, “The most important tool that you need if you’re going to build a business or be a voice of influence who could make an impact on the planet, you got to be a communicator. If you can’t communicate, that is like being in a dark room with a beautiful woman and wink, nothing happens.” Steve Jobs said, “The storyteller is the most powerful person in the world.” It sets the agenda. The storyteller creates the vision, determines how people see themselves, and creates the thirst for what you want to do.

When I came into the industry, for the most part, everybody was giving information from Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill. I believe that if the information could change people, everybody would be skinny, rich and happy. Studies indicate that when you give information, that impacts two areas of the brain. When you provide a story, and I use stories, that impact five areas of the brain. That expands a person’s vision of themselves, touch their hearts because we are emotional people, and ignite their courage in them to do something different with their lives.

I was going to ask you this question. Do you consider yourself a speaker, a motivator, a storyteller, or all of those? How would you define if you could what you do?

I aspire to inspire until I expire. I told my kids, “If they told you that I die, tell them don’t embalm me for three days, and then sneak down to the bog and put a microphone in my hand. If I don’t grab it and say, ‘You got to be hungry,’ you say, ‘Dad’s gone now.’” I’m Mrs. Mamie Brown’s baby boy but I got a new narrative. I sing this song, “I’ve got two mothers and I’m not ashamed. I’ve got two mothers and I love them just the same.”

What’s the secret to telling a good story? That is your specialty, for sure. I listened to you waiting for the story. I have even heard this story before and I still enjoy the story more the 2nd, 3rd, 4th or 5th time. How do you do that?

You experience the story continuously. Ladies and gentlemen, I was on a program with a gentleman who has committed his life to helping people to change their lives. His name is Gary, and his name in itself conjures some thoughts about this thing called life. Number one, you got to have a goal-centered life. People who aim at nothing in life end up hitting nothing dead on the head. He has a goal of helping people to discover their why. When the tough times come, and they’re going to come, their why and reason for being will be their rod and staff to comfort them.

The A in his name is for accountability partners. You got to have some people around you that are going in your direction and people that have goals and dreams that they’re working on and will hold you accountable. People who have accountability partners have a 40% greater chance of reaching their goals than people who don’t. The next thing about his name is the R stands for Relationships. You don’t want to do this thing called life by yourself.

BYW S4 11 | Developing Greatness
Developing Greatness: You’ve got to have a goal to light people who aim at nothing in life and end up hitting nothing dead on the head.

As the Academy Award-Winner Sidney Poitier said, “When you go for a walk with someone, something happens. Either you adjust to their pace or they adjust to your pace.” Whose pace have you adjusted to? Look at the relationships in your life. As Jim Rohn said, “Ask yourself the question, ‘What am I becoming because of this relationship?’” Am I growing? Am I becoming a better person and a better father? Am I growing mentally, spiritually, and financially? What kind of impact that to some people, if you never saw again, it would be too soon?

The Y in his name stands for Yes. Eighty-five percent of people look at their goals and dreams that will allow them to live a different kind of life. They say no to themselves because they have been conditioned to suffer from the possibility-blindness. For Gary, the reason that he does this program is to inspire you to say yes, to encourage you to believe in the possibilities that you can do it, and know that you will have to fail your way through success but you have it within you. Say yes to your dream, to your life, and to a brighter future. I call it the Gary factor. He’s a bad boy up in here.

I know you used my name but take us through what you did there so that we can understand how you did that. What was that? You used my name but what were you thinking about as you were off the cuff?

The speakers speak. When you get coaching on how to do anything, it creates and develops your intuitive skill and gift that’s lying dormant within you. It takes you to a place in yourself where most people who won’t put in the time, focus and effort will never discover that part of themselves. It’s lying there dormant. I’ve got three brothers. They don’t live like I live because they haven’t put in the focus, time, and effort to develop this part of themselves.

I was shocked to find out that my birth mother was a motivational speaker. My grandmother, Beulah Rucker, have the Beulah Rucker Museum in Gainesville, Georgia. She was a motivational speaker but I didn’t know them but because I put in the time, I was willing to invest in myself, because I saw something that caught my eye like this program that you are doing. You could have done a lot of programs but there was something about this and knowing your why.

I think about Man’s Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl. He talked about the Jews that survived the inexpressible cruelties of slavery. Either they had some loved one that they were determined to see, or they had some cause that they believed in or some spiritual commitment and level of reason that fortified their resolve to survive. When we find something that resonates with who we are and something that we love, it’s just you.

When I think about speaking I have the, “Can’t help it.” I can’t help it. I talk in my sleep. You do this problem. You have a lot of other choices. It’s you. Most people die an unlived life. Most people who die at age 25, don’t get better at 65. They are living a misplaced life that’s not them just to pay the bills and survive. What it takes to survive and what it takes to thrive are two different things.

[bctt tweet=”When you get coaching on how to do anything, it creates and develops your intuitive skill and gift that’s lying dormant within you.” username=”whyinstitute”]

You have said, “I’m getting out of line. I’m not following the followers. I want to do something different with my life. I want my life to count. I want to make an impact.” I believe what Horace Mann said, “We should be ashamed to die until we’ve made some major contribution to humankind.” I’m going to have a program that will allow me to make a major contribution. You have studied. You are willing to learn. If you’re not willing to learn, no one can help you. If you’re willing to learn, no one can stop you.

I’m with you. I did thousands of why discoveries for free before I started to see what I see now.

You can see things that other people can’t see.

When you talk about connecting, you said, “I can connect to people, whether it’s on stage, on the phone, or on Zoom online.” How do you connect to people? What is that secret you have? I don’t know what it is but I feel it. How do you do that?

You do know what it is. I speak from my heart. Stories touch the heart. Information fills the brain. When you have a heart-centered message, people experience that. You create an experience. Words that are spoken from the heart enter the heart. Oliver Wendell Holmes said, “Once a man or woman’s mind has been expanded with an idea, concept or experience, it can never be satisfied to going back to where it was.” When you tell a story about something that touched your heart, something that you’ve experienced, or something that you saw or heard, get them out. I heard a young man say on the elevator. He looked at a lady that was being wheeled in a wheelchair and said to her, “Happy Thanksgiving.”

He didn’t know her or me. He was pushing the wheelchair to a gate. That touched me. It’s a random act of kindness. He could have stood there silently like the rest of us but he said, “Have a nice Thanksgiving.” She smiled. I’m reminded of a man who jumped off the San Francisco Bridge but he survived. They asked him, “Why did you want to kill yourself?” He said, “I didn’t want to kill myself but I was going through so much pain in life. I went out for a walk and said that if anybody looks at me and says something kind or smiles, I won’t kill myself. No one did. The moment I let go, I knew I had made a mistake.”

Had that gentleman who stood by me had seen that young guy that day, he would have seen a smile and said, “It’s good to see you.” When he asked the lady how her Thanksgiving was going to be, I chimed in too. We have to create not just viruses of fear but also viruses of love, peace and harmony where we recognize our humanity, connectedness and being willing to, “Reach out and touch somebody’s hand. Make the world a better place if you can.”

BYW S4 11 | Developing Greatness
Developing Greatness: 85% of people look at their goals and dreams that will allow them to live a different kind of life. They say no to themselves because they’ve been conditioned to suffer from possibility blindness.

I have heard you say that many times but tell us about being hungry, “You got to be hungry.” Your book is about that.

Ignite the Hunger is about people who have gone through things, people who had major setbacks, abused, denied, stepped on, and treated unfairly. It’s about the power of the human spirit. Something happens at a defining moment that they came to know that what they were going through, they would get through. In each chapter and each author, when people read the book, it’s not just a read. It’s an experience and it’s needed now more than ever before because people are going through a tough time. I have a son who is bipolar and has schizophrenia. He’s out of control. He hasn’t taken this medication. That’s a challenging experience.

You realize that there are some things you can control and can’t control. There are some people, even your grown children. You have to love from a distance. I have received the first Cancer Centers’ Award of Excellence of Perseverance. I received that award as if life says, “Mr. Perseverance, here’s something that you can’t control. How are you going to handle this? You motivate people around the world but you can’t control and make your son take his medication.” Has it been challenging? Yes, absolutely. I don’t care how old your children become. They’re still your children. You have to learn how to handle that, how to process that, and how to discipline and manage your thinking around that.

Shakespeare said, “Nothing is neither good nor bad but thinking makes it so.” I had to put myself back as an observer. I don’t get to weigh in on telling a grown person, “You need to do this.” If they choose not to do it, there’s nothing I can do about that. What I can do so that I don’t deplete the white blood cells that are available to protect my immune system and continue to beat stage-4 cancer is to find a sense of peace within and say, “Lord, grant me the serenity to accept the things that I cannot change, the courage to change the things that I can, I can change how I respond to this, and the wisdom to know the difference as opposed to being stressed out of my mind.” That does not serve me and that does not help him.

Does that create a hunger in you?

Yes. We are going to experience challenges in life. My favorite book says, “Think it not strange that you have faced the fiery furnaces of this world.” You will, not might. You will have tribulations. Forrest Gump had a point, “Life is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you’re going to get.” What we know is that we have built-in power, authority, and dominion to handle whatever life throws at us. I have an affirmation that I read every morning, “Lord, whatever I face today, together, you and I can handle it.”

All things work together for good for those who love God and for those who are called according to his purpose. They say, “All things will be good or all things will feel good but it will work together for good.” I say, “Lord, help me to hold on so I can find the good.” I feel like Mother Teresa who said, “Lord, I know you know how much I can bear. I just wish you didn’t have so much confidence in me.”

[bctt tweet=”Once a man’s or a woman’s mind has been expanded with an idea, a concept, or an experience, it can never be satisfied to going back to where it was.” username=”whyinstitute”]

What is next for you? You’ve got your book coming out. You’re working with people to help them tell their stories online and in person. You’re very young. For those of you that can’t see Les and you’re just reading, he looks about 45 years old. This 77, I’m not sure if I’m buying that. You’ve got a lot left to give.

It’s coaching people and teaching them what I have learned. Being on the planet for 77 years, I feel like I served at the Lord’s Supper. I used to think people in their 40s were old, then I woke up one morning and said, “I’m 77. Who does this?” I would like people to reach out to me at CoachMeLesBrown.com and also go to HungryForGreatness.org. It’s teaching people how to live a life of meaning and significance. Your life is a gift and how to develop that gift. We have talents, abilities, skills and ideas in us to help people rob the cemetery of their gifts, live full and die empty. That’s what I want to do. I don’t want to work with everybody, just a few people.

They say I have the Midas touch because I don’t touch everything. It’s about working with people who want to invest in themselves and bring out the greatness in them in 2022. People have a story that they want to tell you. Maya Angelou said, “There’s nothing as painful as an untold story buried in your soul.” Help people to tell that story because that story that you’re sitting on, somebody is waiting on. Help them get it out and be able to make an impact, to be a voice of influence, to promote their business or to help them live a life that they can feel proud of. That’s what I’m about. That’s where my focus is, and that keeps me young.

When you talked about telling a story, you said that you’ve got to speak from the heart. How do you teach people to speak from the heart? What does that mean?

I want to ask you a question. When you were coming up, there’s somebody you saw when you’re around 5 or 6 that you admire and wanted to be like. They made you feel safe and good about yourself, who is that person?

It would have to be my dad.

What’s your father’s name?

BYW S4 11 | Developing Greatness
Developing Greatness: We have the talents, abilities, skills, and ideas to help people rob the cemetery of their gifts, live full, and die empty.

Robert or Bob.

What’s the first quality that you liked about Bob and admired about him?

I’m going to say resolve.

Give me an example.

What he wanted to do, he would stick with it until he accomplished it.

“Ladies and gentlemen, my name is Gary. We’re living in a time where lives have been disrupted. I want to share with you my hero, Bob. Bob to me, stands for Believe in yourself, being Open to the possibilities, and be Bold about life. My father is a man that had deep resolve. If there’s something that he wanted to do, he set out to do it. When I think about me, I realize how much he influenced me. I remember as a kid as I watched him, he was my hero. We had Batman, Superman, and everybody else but my hero’s name is Bob. He’s a man’s man and I want to be like him.”

That’s something from your heart. That’s not something you read in Think and Grow Rich. When you talk about Bob, you went to your heart, you got still, you had that faith. Who is that person? Bob is the person that’s special to you. When you tell a story from your heart about Bob and the other things that you learn from him, people can tell if it’s from your head or some script that you had memorized, and you’re coming in to do an information dump. They can tell if this is a person that means something to you and the story that you’re sharing. They can tell and feel it. People will feel your energy. That’s how I teach people to speak. You have to have a heart-centered speech. It’s something that’s in your heart.

[bctt tweet=”It’s very important to have people around you that will believe in you until your belief kicks in.” username=”whyinstitute”]

I think about myself when I speak at events. There’s a bit of fear in speaking from the heart because it gets too emotional and uncomfortable. It gets to where you almost feel like you’re going to have tears or something like that. It’s a fear to go there.

You pull yourself back because the microphone on the stage is not a place for therapy. I have made the mistake of doing that and I learned. You always want to know where you can go with a story. It’s not about you. It’s about the audience. The audience is asking three questions when you give a speech, “Who are you, Gary? What do you have for me? Why should I care?”

When you give a speech from that place, “I’m sharing with you about my father, Bob and his resolve. Do you know what I know? For us to make it in and out of the pandemic, it requires a level of mental resolve and faith. Faith not tested can’t be trusted. I know that you must believe in yourself. My father was an example of that. Here’s what I know. As you look at yourself and at that man or woman in the mirror when you get up in the morning, I want you to know you’ve got greatness looking back at you. I want you to know that when you believe in yourself, when you’re open to the possibilities, and when you believe that I have the faith that I’m going to make it no matter what I’m saying to you, ‘Life is on your side.’ Angels are activated and saying, ‘We got to go down there and help this one here. They got that energy of Bob. This one here won’t stop.’”

I noticed that you add a lot of humor when you speak.

When people laugh, that shuts the mind down. I use laughter and teach my speakers how to use laughter so that when people laugh, their minds close down but their hearts open up. You then come back with a powerful statement. When you get in the heart, they can’t get you out of there. Now you can work on it. Humor is very important. It’s a lubricant that allows you to handle this thing called life. It’s medicine for the soul.

This crossed my mind when you were talking earlier, and I would love to know what this felt like. You have spoken at many different size events, right now to 80,000 people. What was that like? How was it different to speak in front of 80,000 people? Was it any different?

It was very different. It was frightening but you allow your fear to drive you. It’s very important to have somebody around you who believes in you until your belief kicks in. I was frightened up to the moment they handed me the microphone. My mentor, Mike Williams said, “Brownie, you got this. I said, “Do I, Mike?” “Everything that you have gone through has prepared you for this, Brownie. Make your mother proud. She will get a chance to see this. Make her proud today.” “Thank you, Mike. Give me the microphone, sir.”

BYW S4 11 | Developing Greatness
Developing Greatness: You don’t want to be just a presenter because it goes in one ear and out of the other. You want people to experience what you’re saying to them.

It’s very important to have people around you that will believe in you until your belief kicks in. Fortunately, for me, Mike Williams spoke to me. I believe him and I went out there. If people watch Les Brown speaking in the Georgia Dome, they will say, “He has made me Brown’s boy. He’s got it good up in here.” I don’t remember giving the speech. I have only watched about 5 or 10 minutes of it because I’m very critical of myself. People say that it has been viewed by millions of people around the world and it has changed their lives.

When you are getting ready to go on stage and speak to an audience, how do you prepare yourself?

I have a needs assessment that I sent out to clients. That’s what separates me from other speakers. I train speakers and say to them, “Don’t let what you want to say get in the way of what your audience needs to hear.” I ask them a series of questions, “Who have you had in the past? What worked? What did not work? What’s the unspoken conversation? What is it that you want me to provide so that when they leave here, it will make you look good? They will feel better about themselves. They will be motivated and inspired to take their performance to the next level.”

I conduct communications intelligence, asking them questions, and then I incorporate that in the experience that I create on the stage, having in there the things they told me that they want and the reason they brought me in. It’s not just a presentation to entertain them but to empower them, to impact their bottom line, to increase their sales, and to cause them to say to themselves, “I can do more, “Simba, you are more than that which you have become.” They know that to be so.

I hear you say this word a lot and it’s making me think. You talk a lot about the experience. It’s not the presentation or the story. It’s the experience. Tell us what that means to you.

You don’t want to be just a presenter because it goes in one ear and out of the other. You want to experience what you’re saying to them. Each time you tell the story, you want to tell it with the same passion, power and energy. That gets fresh like you’re telling it for the first time. There are people who have heard me tell the story about how I became a disc jockey. They brought me in and said, “Don’t forget to tell the story of how you became a disc jockey.” Why? It’s because they love that story. It took them to a place in themselves that they could not go by themselves. They want to hear that story again, so I tell that story each time like I’m telling it for the first time.

I’m experiencing rejection. I’m experiencing walking back and forth, looking at Rockin’ Roger who was drinking and could not complete his show. I’m saying, “Drink, Rock, drink.” I go there with the power of telling the story and experiencing the story. You cause the audience to take imaginative leaps. They come into the story. You created an opening so that your story becomes their story. You take them on the journey to another place within themselves that they have not figured out how to get there. The story provides the key to unlock and release what Elizabeth Browning would say, “The imprisoned splendor.” I encourage people to study. I study and read constantly even now.

[bctt tweet=”Don’t let what you want to say get in the way of what your audience needs to hear.” username=”whyinstitute”]

Have you got time to tell us that story?

No. I can’t go there. Let them go to the web. I’m going to send them the story because I have to get into that mindset.

I have heard it many times and I love it.

Reach out to me at CoachMeLesBrown.com. I will send them a motivational message that will have that story. They can see it in action and love it.

I love this because you have shared with us what’s happening behind the scenes of what we’re experiencing upfront, which is super helpful for those of us that want to make a bigger impact and connect at a deeper and heartfelt level. It sounds good to say those things, but until we know what it is, how to do it, and see an example of it, it’s just another thing that we’re trying to do that we don’t know how to do.

It’s caring about the audience. Who you are behind the words is far more important than the words that you speak. Zig Ziglar said for years, “If you give enough people what they want, they will give you what you want.” That to me meant that if you give people your best, if you give from your heart, if you hold yourself to a higher standard, if you create an unforgettable experience and have people know that you care about them and you’re not treating them like a transaction, Theodore Roosevelt said, “People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care,” they will give you what you want, referrals and business. You will have an incredible time in eCommerce in this time where we’ve gone from brick-and-mortar to click-and-order.

Les, if people want to connect with you, they want coaching from you and want more, what’s the best way for them to connect with you and buy your book? How can they do that?

They can get the book on Amazon. That’s number one. If they want one-on-one coaching, they can go to CoachMeLesBrown.com. In our training program, we have HungryForGreatness.org. They can go there and we have an ongoing process and a holistic approach of helping people get out of their heads and get into their greatness.

I have been looking forward to this for a long time. I’m so glad this finally came about because I wanted to connect. I know so many of your stories but I look forward to listening to them every single time. Thank you so much for being here. It has been a pleasure having you on.

Thank you for having me. I still feel a special connection with you. You’re my brother from another mother.

Thanks, Les.

I’ll give you a virtual hug.

It’s time for our last segment, and that is the Guess Their WHY. I want to pick somebody that everybody is familiar with from the Olympics, and that would be Simone Biles. If you’re a member, she lost her confidence. She did her routine and lost confidence in the middle of the air, and came down luckily on her feet. From then on, she decided she could not participate in the Olympics because something wasn’t right in her head. What do you think Simone Biles’ why is? I’ll tell you what it is. Her why is trust. It’s to create relationships based upon trust, to be the trusted source, and to be the one that others can count on.

People with the why of trust educate or develop themselves to extremely high levels quite often so that they can be the trusted source so that they can be the expert, so they can be the one. In her case, she lost trust in herself that she could find herself in the middle of the air and come down safely. I believe that her why is to create relationships based on trust. What do you think her why is? Let us know. If you have an opportunity, let us know what you think her why is.

I want to thank you for reading. This has been an awesome episode. I loved having Les Brown here. He’s one of my idols as far as a speaker. If you have not yet discovered your why, we have a special for those of you that read Les Brown’s episode. Go to WHYInstitute.com/Les. You can take the WHY Discovery for free. You can discover your why for free in this episode only. If you love the Beyond Your WHY show, please don’t forget to subscribe and leave us a review and rating on whatever platform you are using. Thank you so much. I will see you and be with you next episode.

Important Links:

About Les Brown

We’ve all been through a lot recently and for most of us, it’s been hard to catch our breath before something else comes along. The one thing I know is that we are all more than what we’ve been through- but it can be tough to realize that truth in the midst of chaos.

If you are looking for solutions to quiet the noise in your mind and focus on improving your life on every level, you need coaching… and you need a community.

I’ve created the Coach Me, Les Brown community to help transform and elevate the individual and collective consciousness of those who are serious about living a life of purpose and passion- while making profits!

If you are hungry to live out your dreams- both in and out of the pandemic, I invite you to join our community as we do a deep dive into the actionable solutions needed for you to win now and in the future.

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Podcast

How To Move Forward Amidst Adversity: Find A Better Way With Michael Johnson

BYW S4 10 | Better Way

 

This episode focuses on the WHY of Better Way. Dr. Gary Sanchez’s guest is Michael Johnson, the owner of Shock Wave Defense. Michael is the ultimate innovator who always looks for a better way to do everything. Join in the conversation to witness how Michael’s WHY plays out in his life, starting with martial arts. Today, he trains the public, law enforcement, and military personnel on how to function properly in resistant environments. If you like to find a better way, you’d love to tune in to this episode. Don’t miss out!

Watch the episode here:

Listen to the podcast here:

How To Move Forward Amidst Adversity: Find A Better Way With Michael Johnson

We’re going to be talking about the why of a better way. If this is your why, then you are the ultimate innovator and you are constantly seeking ways to do everything better. You find yourself wanting to improve anything by finding a way to make it better. You also desire to share your improvements with the world. You constantly ask yourself questions like, “What if we tried this differently? What if we did this another way? How can we make this better?”

You contribute to the world with better processes and systems while operating under the motto, “I’m often pleased but never satisfied.” You are excellent at associating, which means that you are adept at taking ideas or systems from one industry or discipline and applying them to another, always with the ultimate goal of improving something.

I’ve got a great guest for you. He is a perfect example of this. Starting in the martial arts world at two years old, Michael Johnson continues to grow his knowledge and career in combative. He opened Shockwave Defense in Albuquerque, New Mexico in 2002, which combined experiences that yielded life conviction, behavioral psychology and multiple black belt rankings into his interpretation of defense called Bellicusology, the study of militant, martial and warfare ways.

He holds a BA in Criminology from the University of New Mexico and as the Honorary Squadron Commander for 512th Rescue Squadron at Kirtland Air Force Base in Albuquerque, New Mexico. Johnson has done bodyguard work for celebrities such as Xzibit, and was the primary deadly force combatives instructor for the Florida Department of Corrections and their special teams.

His instruction has reached over 19,000 officers in the Department of Correction and has trained multiple officers from other agencies, as well as the Silver City Police Department in New Mexico. He’s a Certified NRA Firearm Instructor and a Professional Lecturer through the New Mexico Department of Public Safety. He teaches domestically and abroad including Taiwan, Yokota AFB and Tokyo, Japan, where he trained the 459th Airlift Squadron, how to defend themselves and their aircraft should a hostile actor try to take over the aircraft.

His tried and tested skills have been tested against underground, full-contact fighters. He has over 55 full contact stick weapon fights. He continues to train the public as well as law enforcement and military personnel in how to function in resistant environments. Additionally, he and his team produced films and judgmental training software scenarios to aid first responders in dealing with violent individuals in shoot and no-shoot scenarios.

Michael, welcome to the podcast.

I’m glad to be on your show.

I’m looking forward to this for a long time because you’ve got a very fascinating story. What you’re doing intrigues a lot of people especially CEOs that are wanting to figure out how to protect themselves. Before we get into that, let’s go back through your life. Tell everybody a little bit about you. Go back into your childhood. Tell us about where you came from, how you got into the martial arts and that whole story.

My why is a better way. The how and the what are also significant factors in this. My how is through simplification, to simplify and then the ultimate thing there is to make sense. I need to make sense out of things. I’ll talk about the nine pillars that shifted my life from when I was a kid. They don’t happen to you. They happen for you. If you understand a lot of elements and things such as the why is an important aspect here, you’ll go, “This makes sense. This is why.”

BYW S3 10 | Better Way
Better Way: Never give up; just keep moving forward.

I’ll get started with this mindset of what I train executive warriors. I have a few different products won for men who are dealing with harsh environments and life-changing events that have taken place, anything from a harsh business decision, family upset, death in the family to dealing with infidelity. Any of those lines that they might be facing, how to handle that mentally but then also how to channel that in a positive way, through being able to protect themselves and their families.

This whole concept is about awakening the warrior within you and using what you have to get what you want. I’ll start with the very first element. The first one was the darkness. I remember when I was younger. I was in my bassinet and the moon used to terrify me. One of the things that I recall was my dad hated hearing us cry at night. He would take me out of my bassinet and put me in the closet. It made it quieter.

From that standpoint of me being in there, I was terrified. I’d be crying. It was harder. He’d come back, hear me crying, whack my rear-ended. Sitting in the darkness was one of the first powers that supercharged my development in understanding both the criminal mind and how to utilize things that we’re afraid of. Most people are afraid of the darkness until they learn how to use it. The first element here is what you start with. It’s not what happens to you. It’s what happens for you.

The next event that was a big part for me was the blade. It was about five years old. I had a knife to my throat. The person was telling me they’re going to slit my throat and stuff my body behind the television so my parents couldn’t find me. That shifted the way I looked at fear and violence. When you’re so helpless, small and don’t have the power to defend yourself in a situation like that, that’s going to change the way you look at everything that you do as you get older to be able to protect and defend yourself. Your tactics are going to be very different.

[bctt tweet=”Most people are afraid of the darkness until they learn how to use it. ” username=”whyinstitute”]

A lot of people look at these events like, “That’s so horrible.” I remember one guy who wanted to do a documentary on my life. He goes like, “Most people go through one thing. You went through a whole bunch. We could do ten documentaries on you.” He almost said it was unbelievable that all these things happened. I said, “I can see that but it’s all documented. You can go find it.”

A unique thing about what other people consider horrible things happened to you are not happening to you. They’re happening for you. It’s going to help shape you into a motivation and drive that’s going to shift the way you think, how you ask yourself questions and what your why is. These all help form who you are.

After the blade, the next one was the brokenness. It seems mild compared to the other events but my dog had died and she was my best friend. As a kid, I lived in the East mountains. I didn’t have anybody to talk to. My parents would go, “Go outside and play with the dog.” That dog was my best friend and when it died, I realized that I did not have any power to bring this animal back. I lost my best friend. You learn how to control the controllable. That’s a tough situation to deal with. Inside of that, that went on. My parents got this horrible divorce and both went separate ways. That added to that area where you can’t control the controllables.

The next big thing that was a huge impact on my life was the lawsuit. The first person that ever sued me was my mother. That was such a unique situation. She was upset because I was in a situation where I was leading the business and she handled things differently. Her fight with life and everybody around her. She didn’t deal with things well on aspects like that.

It was like, “You’re wronging me. I’m going to go after you, destroy you and do everything to you that I did to your dad that led to divorce.” On that court stand, there were a lot of elements inside of there. In my head, I was like, “This is ridiculous and crazy.” What you end up doing from that is if your mother sues you, anyone will sue you. From that point forward, everything was in writing. Leveraging and using it to make it something bigger.

BYW S3 10 | Better Way
Better Way: When you learn how to separate consciousness from emotion, it’s like standing in the eye of the hurricane.

After that, I was homeless. I was living in my car. I ended up finishing college and moved out to Florida. I wanted to experience Florida. I’d never been there. It probably wasn’t the best judgment decision of moving out there and ended up living out of my car, in and out of Motel 6. It was at that point that I understood this concept of the yes. It didn’t matter how many noes I got. It was the yeses that mattered. I ended up finally getting a job. I got 150-square-foot apartment. I was able to start building this company I’d worked on before I left called Shockwave Defense.

I was building it on an ice chest, my laptop and a beach chair that was sinking in the center. It was cutting off the circulation in my legs so I couldn’t sit down for longer than 5 or 6 minutes and ended up putting a board across there so I could try and sit on the board. I don’t have a whole lot of fat on me so my rear end was going numb. It’s such a crazy time in my life. I had an air mattress that I bought from Walmart or something like that at the time. I’d fill it up at night. In the morning, you’re on the floor. It was a huge emotional challenge.

You sat down and start realizing who’s who. People that I thought were good people that were going to help me didn’t help me. The people that were supposed to be bad people reached out their hands and kindness. They were like, “I’ll help you if I can. I’ll pray for you.” I came back from that. I move back to Albuquerque and started opening my school. I have my best friend at the time. I met him when I was probably 6 and he was 5. This guy and I grew up together and saw each other at least 4 or 5 times a week, every single day throughout our lives.

I was debating whether or not I was going to put this in here because it was such a painful memory for me. He helped me build my school and stayed up all night. You know how it is launching a business. You’re putting all your energy into it 24 hours a day. I don’t hear from him for about a week. His girlfriend called me first. She goes, “Have you heard from Kyle?” I said, “No, I haven’t heard from him.” I figured he was ignoring her because she was a nice person but I figured he was probably blowing her off. His mom called. I was like, “I haven’t heard from him.” Then his dad called and that’s when I got concerned. It was all in a matter of a day.

They’re like, “Can you go to his house and see if there’s this black box?” Apparently, his mom had bought him a 0.22 for Christmas and that was gone. We started this rescue search for him. We ended up finding him up in the Jemez Mountains. He went up to the mountains and killed himself. For whatever reasons, it was unknown to me. His poor mother was so devastated by it.

She was like, “How can you be his best friend and not know that he would kill himself?” That put an additional level of stress on me. I was like, “I don’t know.” I felt bad. I’m his best friend. Then she was like, “If you didn’t know then you must’ve done it.” I was like, “This is horrible.” Not only that I lose my best friend but this person is trying to cope in their own way of being able to figure it out so they blame me. It was a standard suicide.

[bctt tweet=”It doesn’t matter how many nos you have. It’s the yeses that matter. ” username=”whyinstitute”]

Everybody that was there, from the PJs because they had to call in the PJs due to the place, he was in the mountains, to the law enforcement they’re like, “This is a standard suicide.” The officers apologized to me. They said, “I’m so sorry. She’s searching for answers.” I’m like, “That was devastating.” If you lost your best friend and this other person is trying to point the finger at you or anyone else, they can make sense out of it.

After that, I was like, “This sucks.” You keep going, never give up and keep moving forward. I started riding motorcycles and was into that for a little while. I got hit by a car head-on on my motorcycle. I flew off. On all accounts, I probably should’ve been killed from it but I got up and walked away. I remember hearing this very powerful and authoritative voice when she hit me head-on said, “It’s not your time. Guard your head.”

That sounded like great advice. I covered up. I don’t know if you’ve ever experienced having flesh ripped off your body sliding across the asphalt but it sucks. It teaches you a lot of pain tolerance. Every time a warrior feel pain, that’s your new pain threshold. It happens the same in business. When you go through something horrible, you’re everything compared to getting hit by a car because the girl wanted to update her Facebook or whatever.

I’m pointing these nine pillars because for a lot of people, they would think, “I would give up. I’d be done.” You’ve got to ask yourself what’s your why? Why do you continue going? Why do you keep fighting? I end up in a situation where I have this woman that I fall in love with and I have a child with her. I find out six months after my daughter is born that she’s cheating on me with not one but multiple men. I was devastated. It was one of those things that you sit down and you’re like, “WTF.” It’s one of those things where you’re like, “This is horrible.”

That in itself for me, out of all the events up to that point probably the hardest I’d ever been through. There’s a thing inside of you as a warrior that you’re used to fighting the external but when the enemy is from within, it hurts so bad that you can’t figure out how to conquer that enemy. It starts to tear you apart and break down your mind. It’s not something you can run from. It’s like food poisoning. You’ve got to let it pass.

BYW S3 10 | Better Way
Better Way: No matter what anybody does, do whatever it takes to ensure your family and friends are taken care of.

You wake up in the middle of the night with these horrible dreams. It was a rough experience. Then 8, 9 years later dealing with the judicial system of a family law system, it is such an asinine concept. It makes zero sense. You go through these different events and end up realizing that every single one of them is a gift. Not one of these things happened to me. They happened for me.

As I was thinking, I went through all these different events as I was getting ready for our chat on your show. I thought you only want to pick the ones that were impactful in my life because I had a bunch of other stuff that went on. The point is at the end of the day, understanding who you are and why you do what you do is what’s going to give you the drive to keep pushing forward.

The Lord has blessed me. I make no qualms about it. Without God, I would not be here. I’ve had a very interesting life. I’ve had a life that at times, although I use it for good, while I was going through it, it sucked. None of these events were like, “Let’s do that again.” I was like, “F that, this sucks.” When you sit down and look at all these different variances as they happen, each one of these elements are gifts from above to allow you to be stronger.

Let me ask you something about that, Michael. When did you realize that these happened for you instead of to you? How old were you? What was it that made you realize that distinction? That’s a huge distinction.

I’ll be honest with you. I was trying to get my mind focused, especially as a young man. Honestly, probably not until I was in my 30s. In my twenties, I was like, “What the hell?” You sit down like, “God either loves me or hates my guts. Why does this stuff keep happening? Can you let me die already?” The moment for me was I had different clients that I would work with and they were at the brink of losing it. They’re like, “I’m ready to end it.”

With all of these different variances that I got to go through, I could give them multiple different answers to a very temporary problem that they were about to make a permanent answer to and be able to pull them out of that arena. Probably it’s in my late 20s, early 30s that I realized God is allowing this to happen because of a prayer that I made when I was a child. I had forgotten about it up until that point.

Martial artists and experiencing the things that happened for me when I was a kid, I remember one time I was watching the evening news and this woman had been brutally attacked. I remember going to my room and I prayed. I got on my knees and said, “God, I can’t always be there but if you could let these things happen to me instead of them, I’m willing to take it on.” At that age, I did not understand fully what I was asking but the Lord blessed me with answering my prayer.

I can pretty much talk to anybody who’s going through anything. Sit down with them and give them a different perspective from a different lens that helps them overcome those moments of fear and pain. It’s all about your focus. There are over two billion bits of information trying to get into your head at any given moment. The conscious has a tendency to chase emotion. When you sit down and start understanding that consciousness and emotion are not one of the same, that you can separate the two of them, you can start understanding what you’re going to choose to focus on.

When you start choosing what you’re going to focus on, you’ll be able to see what makes sense to you instead of the elements of what is being presented to you. Whatever you give your attention to, that owns your mind, heart and soul. If it owns your mind, it owns you. What you have to do is control the three things. This will help you go into the unknown with confidence because life is such a unique world. You can control the controllables but outside of that, you can’t control anything else.

I remember one time a guy was like, “That guy over there, do you think you could take him if he was trying to hurt your daughter?” I said, “Yeah.” He goes, “You don’t know anything about him.” I said, “I don’t care. I don’t need to know anything about him. What I know it was about me. I’m willing to die to protect my daughter. Even if he wins, he can enjoy his victory with one eye because he’s leaving here with an ass-kicking.” It’s about what you focus and what your mind is on.

[bctt tweet=”Understanding who you are and why you do what you do will give you the drive to keep pushing forward.” username=”whyinstitute”]

The first counteroffensive that you use when you’re dealing with all these different scenarios is the three Vs that give you power. You have to learn to control because they are your controllables. As creatures made in the image of our maker, we are given the power to give meaning. People say, “I can control my thoughts.” You can’t. You’ve been to one of my courses, Gary. How quickly can I live between that space between your ears?

If I want to get in your head, I’ll be in your head. Your job as a warrior is to guard the gate of your mind and control vision, voice and visceral. The vision is the media playing out in your head and the meaning that you’re giving that. The voice is the talking. What is being said? Do you tell yourself every single day when you walk past the mirror, “My rear end looks horrible. My waistline is disgusting. Look are those bags under my eyes?”

You have to be able to get your mind wrapped in a different direction of that internal dialogue. “What’s happening there? Are you controlling yourself? Are you in control? Are you separating your consciousness from the emotion and insecurity?” There are different things that will trigger these things. For example, a lot of the men that I work with and coach on dealing with infidelity had this visceral response. They’ll see a car drive fly that reminds them of something that was going on in that event.

It’ll immediately put pictures in their mind. An internal dialogue starts recidivating, going through and building this loop. We all have this loop. If we stay in that loop and keep playing, it’ll suck the life right out of you. It’ll pull the energy away from your soul, productivity and business. That’s the hardest part about controlling all of these events when you’re in them. They’re rough. When you learn how to separate consciousness from emotion, it’s like standing in the eye of the hurricane. The exterior is moving with tremendous force and power but in the center it’s calm.

BYW S3 10 | Better Way
Better Way: Life is a struggle, but the more comfortable you can get being uncomfortable, the more successful you’ll be in life.

When I was telling you some of the stuff, I was annoyed about it. You said, “How do you keep calm?” You exercise through these things, even if it’s a speck of dust in the eye of the hurricane. There was more coming but you learn how to fight through it. When we look at the why, the mindset behind that, there is so much leverage if you can understand what your purpose is.

When I was a kid, my mom used to tell me, “If you walk this Earth, you haven’t changed this world and made it better then you should have never been born.” I believe that. That’s part of what I train the men that I coach and work with. We have female students as well but I have a group specifically that I work with men. I call it the Phoenix Rising because it’s about them living a 2K life. Most of Christ’s works were done in three years. We’re talking about them 2,000 years later. Have the last three years of your life been worth living or talking about for the next 2,000? That’s a powerful thing.

How did you learn all this? Take us through the path that you’ve been on. It’s a fascinating path and there’s a lot of spikes and valleys. How did you learn what you’re sharing? Who was your mentor for what you’re sharing with us?

God. People try to say, “Was there somebody else?” One of those things I prayed when I was on my knees is I said, “Father, I don’t have a father. I need you to be my father. I don’t know how to be a man, a dad or even a father. Will you teach me?” He’s the one that gifted me the discernment, wisdom, articulation, ability to understand it and translate it into a way that people can understand in a way that is clear and has that clarity.

The only way I can say it is in truth. Even when we were doing the underground fights, a lot of the tactics we’d start studying and all of a sudden, I’d have this dream of this amazing concept. I’d go use it and be beating people with this concept that they had never seen. They’re like, “Where’d you learn that?” They wanted to hear some cool Filipino or Asian guy’s name. I’m like, “I dreamt about it last night.” There are levels where he spoke to me in dreams. He’s given me these insights and wisdom. I’m not trying to say I can float above everybody else. I don’t feel that.

What I do feel is that the credit is to him because I would have never gathered this knowledge on my own. There was nobody to teach it. I didn’t have people around me to teach that knowledge. There’s one of the events I left out but fascinating. When my mom was trying to raise us by herself, growing up, she had so much opposition coming against her. She got to a point where she was like, “I want to date.” She married this guy that was a whack job. He kept threatening to kill us all in our sleep. I’m 140 pounds. This dude is 6’5, 6’6 and 240.

I used to have to physically fight this guy almost every other weekend. The one that kept me safe and gave the insights of articulation and understanding was Elohim. It may not be the answer that the audience is looking for but it’s the only answer I have to give them. God gave me the insight to articulate this, understand it and have a discerning eye to see it, the vision, voice, visceral. As I was going into meditation, I was like, “What are the things that mess with us in our reality?” This is what came to me.

Let’s go back a little bit because I don’t know if the audience understands how you got into martial art yourself. Where did you take it? How it shape you for what you’re doing?

Initially, my grandfather started in the arts back in the ’20s. Ironically, his life was probably similar to mine in a lot of aspects. His dad took off when him and his sister were young. When his mom saw that, she took off. At the age of 12 or 13, he started raising himself and his older sister. Samuel Johnson, the guy was such a stud.

When people say, “If you respect somebody, who would that somebody be?” It’s him because he followed this path and felt the Lord paid for him. He quit school and started taking care of his sister at the age of 12 or 13. Martial arts was the only thing for himself. Being a Black man back in the ’20s and ’30s, that was not a good time to be a Black dude. He had to deal with a ton of oppression and all sorts of levels of resistance but he kept a roof over his and his sister’s head. He ended up meeting my grandmother who already had my dad.

He jumped into that scenario and then took on that family as his own. He started training my dad at a very early age, as I understand, from when he was eleven. He got his first black belt when he was 16, 17 years old. He loved the martial arts and continued pursuing it. At the time, the biggest craze was this episode called the Green Hornet. My dad flew out to Seattle to train under a guy named James Lee. James brought in a guest speaker that evening who announced his presence by kicking the heavy bag and shaking the whole building. My dad turned around and Bruce Lee was standing there.

[bctt tweet=”Pain is temporary, but your reputation will outlive your flesh. ” username=”whyinstitute”]

A lot of people don’t understand this. Bruce Lee is a giant but it wasn’t until after he died that his name and reputation got huge. Back then, it’s the Green Hornet, a B-rated movie. People didn’t understand the power of how talented that man was. My dad with his experience in martial arts looked at Bruce and was like, “This guy’s phenomenal.”

At the time, my dad had seven black belts in different martial arts and then went to spar with Bruce Lee. He beat the hell out of him. Bruce beat the hell out of my dad. You got to understand my dad was a bodybuilder also. He’s a very talented guy, muscular, healthy, strong and this small Asian guy that weighs about 140 pounds soaking wet, 5’7” whoops him.

He asked him, “What are you doing after class?” He goes, “I’m flying back to Seattle. I’ll be there tomorrow.” My dad quit his job, went back to the Chinatown School in California and started training under Bruce from ’67 to ’69. I started training when I was about two years old. Bruce Lee was my dad’s best man at his first wedding with my sister’s mother. Long story short, he was like, “You should probably jump into movies with me.” My dad was like, “I don’t feel like doing that.” He’s trying to talk him out of it.

My dad went ahead. They had a part of time where they weren’t talking as much and then Bruce dies. My dad then flies out to China to go train with Bruce Lee’s instructor, Ip Man. By the time he got there, Ip Man had died and so he trained with his son, Ip Chun. When they came back, there were all these martial arts schools that have popped up all over the place after Bruce had died because his name was like wildfire. It swept the nation.

Every place you looked, there was a Kung Fu School. In this scenario, that’s when they moved to New Mexico. I started doing my training at the age of two. I started my daughter at the age of three in the defense. What we did is we went from studying the basics all the way to trying to figure out what the simplification was. I remember my first fight in eighth grade. The guy that I got on a flight plastered me because I was trying to do all these stupid martial arts moves. He smacked and knocked me out cold.

I remember one of the last things my buddy said was, “He got you good,” as I’m passing out. When I came to it, I was like, “Where is he?” He’s like, “He left. He wrote a book. He has a novel. You were out for a minute.” That shifted the way I looked at martial arts. It’s blasphemy to say this but most martial arts are garbage. Ninety-five percent of the stuff is nonsense. It’s that 4% or 5% that works in real-time and resistant environments against multiple opponents, weapon conditions and fighting inside of vehicles that had worked well.

That was the initiation of where I started looking at it differently. After I started doing the underground fights some people started seeing those on YouTube and paying attention. We trained 512th Rescue Squadron out here, flew out to Japan and train the 459th Airlift Squadron. From there, the Ecuadorian Special Forces heard about us. We went out to go train the Ecuadorian Special Forces, got to work with their defense minister’s bodyguards and meet the people at their version of the Pentagon, which was super cool. From there, we went to South Africa and train the tactical response team. It’s been taking off ever since. It’s been a huge blessing.

It would be fascinating for people to know because most of us will never experience a fight room or fight club. What is it like going into a fight club? How does it work? What did you experience? Why did you do it?

BYW S3 10 | Better Way
Better Way: Dauntless is a basic training program on how to overcome fear.

Initially, I did it because I was pissed. I had found out that my kid’s mom was cheating on me. I was having some serious issues handling my temper. It’s such a devastating thing to find out about. There were two events. It’s not my personality. I’m not the guy that gets pissed because you flipped me off in traffic but this guy cut and flipped me off. I started crawling out of the vehicle after him.

I’m sitting there with one of my instructors and he’s like, “It seems like you’ve got some anger issues.” I’m like, “What?” He’s like, “Let’s probably channel that the correct way. There’s a group I know about. You can go in there, fight with sticks, chains, microwaves and bullwhips. You can fight 2-on-2, 3-on-3, 5-on-5, whatever you want. There are no rules, no judges and no refs and you won’t go to prison.” I was like, “I’m in. Sign me up.”

I went in and trained for it. When I first watched the videos of these other guys doing it, I was like, “You guys are idiots. You are sitting in there beating the hell out of each other with sticks and all these other weapons.” I thought I’ll do one to get this thing out of me, deal with it and then 60 fights later, I’m still doing it. There’s something anthropologic for a male specifically about hitting another human being with a stick. It feels very natural.

I know that sounds crazy but once I did it for the first time, I remember that night after the fights. I went to bed and there was no ambient on the planet that will give you a peaceful night’s sleep like fighting a human being. The very first guy that I fought looked exactly like the guy that my ex cheated on me with. I was like, “Thank you, God.” I didn’t care if I won or lost. I want to beat his ass. I fought him. That night when I went to bed, I slept like a baby. I didn’t even think I moved that night.

The psychology of going into it is a lot. If you’re going to compare it, a lot of it is like the fear you have in running a business for the people that are fighters. There’s a serious level of fear and of, “Is this going work? If it doesn’t work, what’s going to happen? Am I going to lose everything? Am I going to die? Am I going to not be able to provide for my family?” It forces you to face your fears and fight through them because pain is temporary but your reputation will outlive your flesh.

When you get into that mindset, where you go, “I’m going all the way and playing all out,” that is the only way to live. If you want to leave a name and live a life that we’re talking about for 2,000 years, you can’t go into it halfway and go, “I don’t want to get hurt.” “F that. If I get hurt, that’s cool. Give me a cool story.” You’ve got to get into that mindset of how are you going to get to that next level, how are you going to build your psychology and your heart and mind so you can lift the people around you up. All this stuff is fine and dandy, but it’s not about glory.

I’m not saying it to try and sound poetic. Sometimes you’ll hear religious people, “It’s not about my glory but God’s,” as they sit there, try and get their own glory. What this boils down to is energy is constant. It can’t be created or destroyed. What talks about you when you leave this earth? Your absence has to be your presence. That’s based on the lives you touched while you were on this earth, the frequency you put in other people through the energy. What glorifies God’s name is your ability to keep pushing through the pain, keep driving through all the adversity and then still have the frequency and energy to smile.

When you tell people about the horrendous things that have happened to you, you’re doing it with a smile on your face. People are like, “Weren’t you scared?” “Yeah, I thought I was going to die but here we are.” You got to get that mindset where you move to that next level. I’ve been very blessed that even through these things, I’ve had some awesome and amazing mentors in my life that the Lord has given me and he’s given me wisdom.

I’ve also noticed that he’s given me people in my life that have helped me, and Steve Maestas was one of those. He’s a good friend of mine, a mutual friend of both of ours. When I was first training at my first school, I was teaching out of a storage container. I ran an ad in a thrifty nickel. Steve Maestas found it, came down and trained. I didn’t know the guy was as powerful as he was as a person and also on business.

He came in and played along. I started looking at the cars. He was showing up to class and I’m like, “What are you doing? How do I do it?” He goes, “I’ll coach you but here’s how this is going to go.” He gave me some insights and I appreciated that. He’s a very giving human being. He’s a great dude and that was a blessing. He gives back a ton to his community.

[bctt tweet=”For courage to exist, fear has to be present.” username=”whyinstitute”]

With that being said, going into a fight and then understanding the business aspects are very similar in that. The other thing is learning how to turn it on and off. You can’t walk around pissed off all the time. When you have a reputation like our school and facility do, everybody wants to fight you. I saw this in school when I was a kid. Kids think if they can beat me up, they can beat up Bruce Lee because my dad trained under him. Everybody in the room wants to kick the hell out of me. It was an interesting childhood and not much has changed in that aspect. I’ll walk by somebody and they’re like, “I don’t like that guy.” “I don’t even know you. Do you want to fight me?”

Describe for everybody that’s never going to be there what a fight club is. Where do they host these things? Is it a house? Take us into your mind as you were going that first time to this fight club not knowing what you got yourself into. What did you see? What were you feeling? What happened?

I’ve been skydiving. The moment that you let go of the plane, you feel like baptized in fire. All these chemicals are rushing through your body. It’s a mixture between that and standing on the high dive for the first time and getting ready to jump. There was a ton of this anxiety, fear and concern. I had martial artists that were friends of mine forever. They’re like, “Don’t fight these guys. They’re going to try and maim you.” I was like, “What’s the point? What are we doing here?” The whole reason we’re doing this is if somebody is trying to maim us at work. I’d rather find out in this controlled environment and find out when I’m around my daughter or something.

It was a totally different mindset, walking in there and they’re hosted everywhere. We have our own group. We fought in another guy’s group, and that one was in a martial arts school but sometimes they’re done under bridges, warehouses and parks. I’ve fought in all sorts of different places. It’s something that you go into with the ideology that you want to do the best that you can to not permanently injure that person for the rest of their life but make no doubt where they’re to hurt each other inside of that environment.

There’s a brotherhood to it though. My job is to push you as hard as I can but I will tell you, as I’ve done this more, I’m not trying to break people the way that I was when I first started. When I first started, I didn’t care. If I could wreck you, I’d wreck you because I had a lot of anger in my heart. As I sat down and started getting past that, I realized this is more to help men channel.

There are girls that’ll fight in these things too but it’s more to help men channel that aggression that built-up angst. I get a lot of guys that go, “I always wanted to be in the military but instead, I became a dentist.” They did what everybody told them to do versus what their heart led them to. This gives them a channel where they can execute and exercise it out. That’s one aspect of the many experiences that I’ve done in life. I want everybody to think, “This guy fights in underground fights.” That’s part of it. I’ve had an amazing life.

I used to have a pet Cobra because I was afraid of Cobra so I wanted to learn how to handle this thing. If it’d bite me, I would die in eight minutes. She was beautiful. I named her Halo. She was this albino monocle. She had silky-smooth pink and white skin. She was very pissy. I eventually got rid of her because she kept trying to bite me. I had four people have dreams that she bit me and I died. I was like, “That’s probably a sign.”

That’s one element of the many aspects that I have gone through in my life. Mixed all the things that you have of the unknown into one pot and then walk up with confidence. That’s what going into a flight club is like. Imagine taking everything that you were afraid of, both physically and emotionally and people are going to embarrass you. There’s a huge imposter syndrome when you go into something like that. You’re like, “These guys are going to beat me and then pull my underwear over my head.” This is fear that you’re going to go out and these people are going to screw you.

In order for the courage to exist, fear has to be present. With my fighting, guys would come out afterward like, “I’ve never seen anybody move like that. What’s your secret?” I’m like, “I don’t like pain.” I don’t want to lose and get hurt. I was fighting so hard and fast giving everything I had because I knew what it was like to lose from that guy that broke my nose in eighth grade. The greatest gift anybody ever gave me was him breaking my face.

After that, I was like, “That sucked.” I looked like a raccoon for three months. My eyes were black. My nose was all smashed into my face. I was like, “Thank you.” That gave me the motivation and drive that I was like, “If somebody wants to beat me again, they better pack a lunch because I’m going to go all out.” That’s the element that you need in business also. It’s learning how to thrive and function in the unknown with confidence. It’s such a hard world to live in. We get so caught up.

Tell me what you know about what’s going on in the world. We don’t have a freaking clue. Everything you’re being taught or fed is some agenda propaganda. Here’s what I do know. God is in control. No matter what anybody does, I’m going to do whatever it takes to make sure my family, brothers and friends are taken care of. I don’t need to know what’s going on in everything else because that can suck all my energy out.

“I know me. I keep going no matter what. If you want to beat me, you better freaking pack a lunch because I’m going to come at you with everything I’ve got.” That’s that mindset that you get from fighting that is essential for business. The more tools you have in your tool belt, the better you are at Warcraft. Having known your why, I’ll be honest with you, and that is why I was willing to come on and chat with you is a huge weapon against the enemy because the enemy may not know their why but if your why, you can be the enemy to the enemy. They’ll try, leverage, come against you and get under your skin. They’ll mess with your business and screw with everything that you’ve got going on. You’re like, “I know why I’m doing what I’m doing. I know what motivates me and I’m hungry.” That’s a powerful thing to have in your back pocket.

For the audience, I spent some time with Michael. I did your urban defense conceal and carry. I went into that thinking, “I’m fairly athletic. I did a lot of sports. I’m in good shape. I do weights, this and that. I’ll probably be pretty good at this.” I walked into your class and you probably could have killed me as many times and as fast as you wanted. I had no say in it with no recourse at all. Whatever was going to happen, I couldn’t defend myself.

It’s in the beginning. At the end, you felt very confident in being able to do that. Here’s the thing as men. We have this ignorant perspective where we’re like, “I got a penis so I know how to fight.” That has zero credibility anywhere. Every time you talk about doing a combative course or a defense class, they go, “I’m going to send girls to that because I’m a guy.” It’s the dumbest thing.

As men, that’s part of our insecurity but there are very few men that are willing to go do it as you did and then go, “I don’t know what I’m doing but I do now.” That’s why you were there.” If I sucked and you could beat me up then you should probably be teaching the class, not me. You going through that, we deliberately looked at what your weaknesses were and we capitalized on them.

If you notice your wife had certain weaknesses, we changed and worked on what her weaknesses were. That’s what a good instructor should always do. They shouldn’t be there kicking the hell out of the students. Their objective and mission are to make the students think that they’re getting the hell kicked out of them because it is so demanding for them. That instructor could go up 9, 10 more levels. That was the objective. You did the two-day defense immersive training as well.

[bctt tweet=”Learn to move through adversity with ease to the best of your ability. ” username=”whyinstitute”]

You did scenarios where we were being carjacked or somebody comes into your house. These are not like video game things. This is an actual car there that you’re carjacked in and what will you do or an actual house. How do you clear your house? What I found fascinating was how wrong my perception was of even something as simple as how far away someone can be from you and still get to you before you can do anything to them. That was fascinating.

It’s not your world. You don’t know these things until you experience something. We’re blessed at Shockwave because we have an amazing cadre. We’ve got Dr. Dela Garza and Instructor King. I’ve got another guy that was from Seal Team 3 and 5, Shane Hyatt. He’s an amazing guy. He comes in and talk about mindset. He and I codesigned a knife together. We’ll bring instructors from South Africa. We brought Ed Calderon out at one point for him to do this escape and evasion training. He’s a fascinating person as well.

We’re blessed to have such a unique group of people to help expose everyday civilians to these things so that they don’t die because the enemy knows you don’t know. In that moment when you’re like, “I got enough space. I’m good.” They’re on top of you and you can’t get your gun out. That’s when you realized, “Maybe I should learn some hand-to-hand and nice stuff.” When I trained the department of corrections, there were probably 30 guys in that class. We did an exercise with these electric knives where we’ll run and zap you.

We had a drill. Their job was to pull the gun out and they didn’t know if I put a malfunction in a weapon or not. I was probably 40 something feet away. I killed every single one of those guys in that mock scenario with the exception of one that did what I told him to. I said, “Don’t focus on your gun. Fight me.” He pulled the gun out that didn’t work and blasted me in the face, which sucked at the time but it was super awesome to see that he listened. I got hit. I was so proud. My bell was ringing. He did what he was supposed to do.

That’s the goal of life. Learn to move through adversity with ease to the best of your ability and to keep pushing. It’s not about your ego because it’s like looks, they’ll fade. What is the legacy you’re leaving on this earth for future generations to talk about? Martial arts is the weirdest industry. Martial artists drive me insane. They remind me of Star Wars nerds. They sit down blabbering. I don’t care about any of this. All I care about is can Gary Sanchez protect his wife when some crack head is coming after them?

It’s what works in real-time. Getting caught up in the nuances of what system works better. It’s like the amateur argument of 0.45 caliber versus 9. Amateurs argue caliber. Professionals argue shot placement. If I shoot you in the face, it doesn’t matter what I shoot you with. It’s going to suck. That mindset of understanding how to get honed in and get deliberate, that’s going to take you to a different level in your love life, combatives and business.

A lot of the men I coach are like, “I don’t know what to do with my wife. She’s upset with me.” I’m like, “Did you win her heart? Did you conquer her? You say you’re a warrior, did you conquer? Do you conquer that woman in the bedroom, kitchen or living room? You’ve got to re-win her heart every single day or some ever douchebag out there on Facebook is trying to, trust me. He’s sitting there going, ‘Girl, you’re so hot. I love your filtered photos.’ In her mind, she’s going, ‘I’m going to replace my man.’” You both have to fight to re-win each other’s hearts. Life is a struggle but the more comfortable you can get being uncomfortable, the more successful you’ll be in life.

Michael, the last question I want to ask you is what is the best piece of advice you’ve ever been given or you’ve ever given?

Something that’s with me probably the most is if you weren’t afraid of failing, what would you attempt? If you knew the fear wasn’t an option, what would you do? I understand that fear is a necessity in life and it’s important. Too many people waste the energy of their ability in the day on what they’re afraid of instead of facing what they fear.

If you allow other people’s beliefs, they become your reality. You will end up always being what they say you are instead of what God made you be. If you can learn to be a full version of who you were born to become on this earth, you’d be living a life worth talking about for 2,000 years. What would you do without fear? If it was impossible to fail, what would you attempt? If there was one piece of information or insight, I would more likely than not say what was that.

If there are people that want to connect, bring you into work with them or find out more about what you’re doing, what’s the best way for them to connect with you?

Text the word, WHY, to (505) 437-4029. We’ll know that you’re coming from Gary’s show and we’ll give you guys a special gift. What I recommend doing is starting off on a call. If it’s something that you’re serious about, you want to grow your mind, get past limitations and conquer some challenge in life, jump on a call with us.

If you’re not there, you don’t have a major challenge going on, I’m probably not the guy for you but if you have a major challenge that you want to conquer and overcome then jump on a call with us. When you text the word, WHY, to (505) 437-4029, you’ll end up being in a position where you’ll get access and we’ll jump on a discovery with you. We’ll figure out if we’re a good fit for each other. After that, if you like what we do and it seems to match you, we have some options that we can enroll you in but we make every student that wants to train with us go through basic training first.

What’s included in basic training? What is that?

We call the program, Dauntless. It’s how to overcome fear. It’s not only going to be from a mindset exercise of how to grow yourself and make yourself stronger with daily, weekly and monthly routines but also how to grow yourself from a combative standpoint with what we call the Theoretical Minimum of Defense. If you’re familiar with physics, there’s a concept called the Theoretical Minimum of Physics. If you understand those basics, you can do all of physics. If you understand these basics, we’re going to teach you in Dauntless. You can do all combatives hand-in-hand.

If you look at every single system on the planet, all of them are made up of about anywhere from the top fifteen moves then there are variances and spins off. They go, “This is an advanced move.” “It’s not. You put the other moves together.” Once you understand the three ways to shut down the human being, the timers, switches, mechanics and then you start to understand the fundamentals and environments, that is what you’ll learn inside of fearless and basic training.

Michael, thank you so much for being here. It’s been awesome to connect, know your story and how you’ve taken and transitioned that into something that helps so many people. I look forward to staying in touch as we go on our journeys.

Thank you for having me, Gary. Thank you for what you do for the community with why. It’s an awesome tool to have in the tool belt to anybody that gets a chance to do that. If you have not, you should activate that and also send it out to your friends. If you care about people, living a purposeful life is an important thing to have. That’s an important element of living each day with power. If you know anybody that can use the why, fully endorse it. Thanks for having me, Gary.

I appreciate it, Michael.

It’s time for our new segment and that is Guess The Why. We picked somebody famous that everybody at least typically knows. We’ll guess what we think their why is. I want to pick the why of Conor McGregor, the MMA fighter. What do you think his why is? He does things differently. He challenges people.

He’s getting into business. He went from MMA to the top of MMA to then fighting a boxer, which nobody had ever done. He did that at the highest level. He’s made a fortune. He doesn’t ever follow a typical path. He beats to his own drum. He does it his own way. He won’t follow the rules and do what people tell him to do.

Which of the nine whys do you think his why is? For me, I believe that Conor McGregor’s why is to challenge the status quo and think differently. Don’t follow the rules. Ask the question why not versus following what people say he has to do. If any of you out there know him, make sure you put him in contact with me so we can discover his why. I’ll get back to you and let you know for sure.

Thank you so much for reading. If you have not yet discovered your why, you can do so at WhyInstitute.com. You can use the code, PODCAST50, and get it at half price. If you love the show, please don’t forget to subscribe. Leave us a review and rating on whatever platform you use so that you can help us bring the why to one billion people in the next years.

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About Michael Johnson

BYW S4 10 | Better WayStarting in the martial arts at 2 years old, Michael C. Johnson continues to grow his knowledge and career in combatives. He opened Shockwave Defense in Albuquerque, NM in 2002 which combined experiences that yielded life conviction, behavioral psychology, and multiple black belt rankings into his interpretation of defense called Bellicusology (The study of militant, martial, and warfare ways). He holds a BA in criminology from the University of New Mexico, & is the honorary squadron commander for the 512th Rescue Squadron at Kirtland AFB in Albuquerque, NM. Johnson has done bodyguard work for celebrities such as Xzibit, and was the primary deadly force combatives instructor for the Florida Department of Corrections & their Special Teams Units. His instruction has reached over 19,000 officers in the Department of Corrections, and has trained multiple officers from other agencies as well as the Silver City Police Department, NM. He is a certified NRA firearms instructor and a professional lecturer through the New Mexico Department of Public Safety. He teaches domestically and abroad including Taiwan, and The Yokota AFB in Tokyo Japan, where he trained the 459th Airlift Squadron how to defend themselves and their aircraft should a hostile actor try to take over the aircraft. His tried & tested skills have been tested against underground full contact fighters and he has over 55 full contact stick/weapons fights.

He continues to train the public as well as, law enforcement and military personnel in how to function in resistant environments. Additionally, he and his team produce films in Judgmental Training Software scenarios to aid first responders in dealing with violent individuals in shoot, and no shoot scenarios.

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Podcast

The WHY Of Make Sense: Cracking Data And Solving Problems With Len Herstein

BYW S4 9 | Make Sense

When we don’t question things because things are going right, that’s when we miss micro-issues. In this episode, you’ll witness how the WHY of Make Sense works. Dr. Gary Sanchez welcomes Len Herstein, the CEO and President of Lead ManageCamp Inc. Len displays his uncanny ability to make sense of data and use that to solve problems. When COVID hit, he immediately pivoted from live events to virtual events. How did he make such a successful move? By gathering feedback to create a great learning experience. Len continued to bring his WHY as he went on to work for other companies. Learn how he makes sense and solves problems throughout his journey. Tune in!

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The WHY Of Make Sense: Cracking Data And Solving Problems With Len Herstein

In this episode, we’re going to be talking about the why of making sense, to make sense of the complex and challenging. If this is your why then you are driven to solve problems and resolve challenging or complex situations. You have an uncanny ability to take in lots of data and information. You tend to observe situations and circumstances around you and then sort through them quickly to create solutions that are sensible and easy to implement. Often you are viewed as an expert because of your ability to find solutions quickly.

You also have a gift for articulating solutions and summarizing them clearly in understandable language. You believe that many people are stuck and that if they could make sense out of their situation, they could develop simple solutions and move forward. In essence, you help people get unstuck and move forward.

I’ve got a great guest for you. His name is Len Herstein. He has years of experience in business and brand marketing. Prior to founding his marketing and events company, ManageCamp Inc., Len innovated, managed, and grew brands for major consumer packaged good marketers, including Campbell Soup, Coca-Cola, Nabisco, and others. Since 2015, Len has served as a Reserve Deputy Sheriff with the Douglas County Sheriff’s Office in Colorado.

Len, welcome to the show.

Thank you. It’s great to be here, Gary. Thanks for having me.

This is going to be fun. It’s a very interesting background and what you’re doing right now. Take us through your history a little bit. Take us back to where did you grow up? Where did you go to high school? What were you like in high school? How did you progress to where you are now?

We’re going way back. I grew up in the Westernmost part of Long Island, New York. My family is from Brooklyn. A bunch of people moved from Brooklyn out to this area where I went to high school in Valley Stream. What was I like in high school? I wish I could say I was like the coolest kid, but I don’t think I was. I straddled this weird line because I was an athlete. I played soccer, baseball, basketball, and stuff, but I was also a student in the AP classes and stuff like that.

I walk this fine line between athlete and academic. I learned how to get along with a lot of different people and play a lot of different roles in friendships and stuff. That’s where I came. I went to college at Cornell University in New York and studied Marketing. I came out of there and went to work in consulting. I was one of those guys who didn’t know what I wanted to do, so I consulted. That helped me figure it out.

I worked for Anderson Consulting, which is now called Accenture. Basically, in the first year or two, I figured out what I got hired for was computer programming. They take you out of college at that point and send you to this university that they built for themselves in St. Charles, Illinois. They taught us how to program in COBOL II, which is an old mythic language. It didn’t take me long to figure out that was not what I wanted to do. I was not good at it. I did not enjoy it.

I made the switch over to what was called Change Management. I worked on the teams that helped organizations go through the changes that these new systems that we were building made for them. I did that for a couple of years and went back, got my MBA back at Cornell in Marketing, and made that switch over to consumer-packaged goods marketing.

I went to work for Nabisco, Coca-Cola, and Campbell Soup before I realized that I was going to a lot of conferences. I found myself coming home early from a lot of them back in the days when we had travel agents that we would call and stuff. I decided to put together the conference that I would want to do. I was having a hard time finding it. That’s what my conference was called brand managed camp became. We did our 19th Annual back in May 2021. This one was virtual, so we did that. Several years ago, I became a volunteer police officer basically. I’m the Sheriff’s Deputy here in Douglas County, Colorado, which was a whole new path for me.

[bctt tweet=”Drive your business forward towards a more profitable, more innovative, and more successful future.  ” via=”no”]

I’m sure we’ll talk about that. I was looking for a way to give back and do something different, and this came up. I went through a whole academy, a long field training process, and became a deputy. I was learning some things that were surprising to me and I could bring them back to my business and personal life. That’s where this concept of complacency is. I learned about how complacency kills. We fight it with vigilance and law enforcement.

I saw a lot of synergies back to business in terms of complacency kills brands, businesses, organizations, and personal relationships. My book that came out is called Be Vigilant!: Strategies to Stop Complacency, Improve Performance, and Safeguard Success. It’s all about specific strategies you can use right away to fight complacency in your own life, whether it be work or home, with vigilance. That’s my life.

Let’s dive into that a little bit. When you were in high school, you were the athlete and the student. Were you the guy that people would go to if they had problems or issues and say, “Len, can you help me? I got something going on. Can I tell you what’s going on?” Were you the guy that would help them?

I’d like to say I was, but I think the honest truth would be no. I don’t think that happened back then. I don’t think I have gotten into that role yet. We were more about, “Where can we find some beers and get down to the boardwalk?” It was a simpler life back then, Gary. They didn’t seem like there were many problems to solve.

Everything was easy to figure out, but getting into programming was not the direction you thought you were going to go. Were you forced in that direction?

I wouldn’t say I was forced in that direction, but we’re talking 1991 at this point. At that time, those gigs out of college were pretty high, relatively paying. I think the number was $33,000. It was the starting salary. That was huge, enormous. It was one of those things where I didn’t quite know what I wanted to do. I figured I probably wanted to go back to grad school at some point, but I needed some years to figure out what that was going to be about.

I took that job, and that initial thing in terms of programming turned out not my thing. It was good because it helped me figure that out. I went down this path of change management, which is helping people solve problems brought on by change. During those jobs, I ended up doing some consulting work. Some of our clients were marketing companies per se like Pepsi and AT&T. That’s when I started getting excited about marketing. That then gave me the confidence that I knew what I wanted to do. That’s when I went back for my MBA.

As a change management agent, what did you do? What was that?

A lot of the time I spent working in the government sector. We were coming into the state tax department, state DMV, stuff like that, mostly tax stuff. Putting together new computer systems for them to help them manage the flow of information and data they have basically do the things they had to do. When those new systems would come in, there would be enormous changes to workflows, jobs, and what was required of people.

The change management job was about mapping out where are we now? Where are we going to be in the future? How do we get people between there with the least amount of pain? It was a lot of reorganization, re-engineering of jobs and processes, and training to help people get the skills and the knowledge they needed to move forward.

That sounds like it fits you pretty well.

BYW S4 9 | Make Sense
Make Sense: The path of change management helps people solve problems that are brought on by change.

 

It did. That was right up my alley. Now that you told me I’m a make sense guy, it makes all sense to me.

It’d be interesting when you go back to one of your high school reunions to find out if your classmates felt that way about you, like, “Len was somebody that I could talk to. Len was somebody that if I had a problem, that’s where I would go because he’d helped me figure it out.” It’d be interesting to ask your classmates that question. I bet you. They’re going to tell you, “Yeah, you were that guy. You were partying, an athlete, and all that, but if I had someone I needed to talk to, I was going to talk to you.”

It’s possible.

Based on your why, I would bet that’s the way it is. You were in change management, and then you decided to go to Cornell. Why did you switch from change management to marketing? Why did you feel you needed an MBA?

I started doing some work within companies that I would consider marketing-driven companies. It’s a certain type of marketing. Everybody has a different definition of marketing. I talk more about brand management. To me, brand management is running many businesses. When you would run a brand for Campbell Soup or Coca-Cola, or something like that, you would touch everything, P&L, sales, manufacturing, research and development, advertising, which would be the traditional way people would think about marketing.

There are all these other elements that go into what I would consider marketing or brand management. That started to excite me, being at the hub of this wheel, influencing everything, and driving this business forward towards a more profitable, innovative, and successful future. Once I saw that I started thinking about how do I get there? I started processing the information and said, “Here’s where I want to be. What’s the way to get there?”

It became fairly evident to me that if I was going to do that type of job at the type of company that I wanted to do, which was like a Coca-Cola, those types of things, I did need to go back to school. I did need to get my MBA. It was going to get hard. If I wanted to come in through, like maybe a sales role or something, and then work my way over into marketing, I could have certainly done that, I’m sure. The quickest way for me to get to where I wanted to be was to use that advanced degree as my pivot point and move into a new area.

You did that and through that, you learn that the type of education you’re going to get at these events didn’t make sense. You’re bored to death and wanted to leave, so you created your own.

As a brand marketer, I’d go to a lot of conferences. When I was at Campbell Soup and working on suits that we were marketing to kids, I would go to kid’s marketing conferences. They’re all very niche and specific. They would look great on paper, and I would get there. They would serve me a cold bagel for breakfast. You’d show up and be sitting there. Maybe a bunch of people trying to sell me things as opposed to telling me anything useful. This was back in the days where if someone showed up with a Mac and nobody had a dangle, and everything broke down.

The execution wasn’t great. The content wasn’t great. I wasn’t getting anything actionable. I was walking away with. In general, I felt like they were a big waste of time. Literally, it’s a cliche, but it’s 100% true. This will date me and tell you how old it is. I was on a US Air flight from New Orleans back to Philly and started writing down on a cocktail napkin what the next conference I was going to go to had to offer me. I couldn’t find anything that matched those requirements. My wife got tired of hearing me talk about it until they did something about it. I generally do what she tells me. That’s how we made it this long.

What is it you want at a conference? What did you write down?

[bctt tweet=”People have different attention spans and do things differently. ” via=”no”]

I wanted something that was going to deliver actionable insights that I could use. I wanted something that was going to be a broad look at brand management. It wasn’t going to be so narrow that every topic overlapped and was repetitive with each other. It had to have speakers who needed to be keynote quality. I didn’t want one great speaker and then a bunch of people from the industry who look good on paper.

The thing I started to see at least in the conferences I was going to. This is not a broad thing. In the conferences that I was going to, there was this move towards multi-track events. There’s a lot of panel discussions. A lot of it was built around getting a lot of speakers in there, who had big titles and big companies, that they can then use to pad their attendance list with like, “Look at all these great companies that are going to be here,” and then they could sell sponsorships.

It was all about the sponsorship money, the sponsorships. What I was looking to do is I was looking to create a conference that was simpler and easier to go to that delivered actionable insights, a single-track conference where there were no choices to make. It wasn’t super complicated to figure out what I was going to go to. I wanted it to be attendee-focused, not sponsor-focused. I wanted to be focused on delivering actionable insights that people could use right away, along with a broad range of topics. It had to have great food and be executed flawlessly. Other than that, it was pretty simple things.

It’s hard to find one like that even now. It sounds like you created that. Is that what your events are like now?

That’s exactly what it is. We focus heavily on execution and making sure everything runs smoothly. We value the fact that people are taking money and, more importantly, time away from their families and offices and stuff like that to come to spend it with us. We value that a lot. We want to make sure that not only do they get a great learning experience, but that seating is comfortable. Everybody can hear everything. When they break for lunch, there’s hot food, great choices, and healthy food available.

A lot of people, especially in marketing, talk about the experience. We have a lot of great speakers who have spoken about customer experience and things of that sort. What I found was the conferences weren’t living that. They would bring in speakers to talk about it, but they weren’t living it themselves. They weren’t creating a great experience. That’s what we set out to do.

Tell us about the first conference you threw.

The first one we threw was in Philly in 2003. We’re in this post 9/11 timeframe where the travel industry had been decimated. Hotels and everything was hurting. We were able to come in and get this sweetheart deal on a contract with a hotel, which was a big deal. In the conference industry, you have to put a lot of money upfront. You’ve got to guarantee a lot of things in order to get space and hope people come. We were able to get this great deal so that our risk was low.

I was still working for Campbell Soup at that time. For the first four years of starting my business, I still worked full-time for Campbell Soup. I was trying to build the proof of concept here. It was in Philly. I think 90 people showed up is what happened. It was in this small ballroom. We had great food, sushi, and all these things. We thought we had a great experience. Several years ago, we looked back at how different it was in terms of what the AV capabilities are now and the things we can do with the stage, the slides, and everything going on. It was pretty interesting.

We were able to succeed early as we were able to get speakers at our event that were well beyond our budget. Somehow, I was able to negotiate it. We have Seth Godin, who’s written a ton of marketing books and a huge deal. We had a guy named Malcolm Gladwell, who probably doesn’t speak for less than $75,000 to $100,000 now. We got him for next to nothing back. Those types of things upfront help us get started down this path. There’s a lot of things lined up for us that went in our favor back in those early years. It helped us learn quickly and cheaply.

What was the title and topic of your first event?

BYW S4 9 | Make Sense
Make Sense: To be part of the solution was to create a great relationship between the community and law enforcement by joining it.

 

As we moved on, we stopped having topics. The first event was marketing in turbulent times. It was something about marketing in turbulent times. I started to realize what happened because the first 2 or 3 years, we changed our theme every year. It was always a marketing conference, but we call it marketing in turbulent times or something else. Because of that, we have to rebrand every year. We have to convince people that this is the topic they need to hear more about. The more you focus on a specific topic, the more you have that problem, where you have overlapping things and people talking about the same things and maybe contradicting each other and all this.

After a few years, we moved away from coming up with a new topic every year. The tagline for the event has been and still is fresh thinking starts here. For brand marketers looking for fresh thinking for their brands and organizations, this is the destination each year. It made it a lot easier for us. We didn’t have to brainstorm a whole new thing, like, “What would it be in 2021?” It would be like “Marketing in turbulent times.” Every year is marketing in turbulent times. It’s never not turbulent. Nobody ever wakes on me, like, “Marketing is easy in 2021. It’s easier.” They’re giving us more money to do less. It’s fantastic.

You got out of working with Campbell Soup, and the event was your business or was there a different business besides the event?

We also did consulting work, but the event was the main part.

We move forward to COVID and no events.

Things got shut down pretty quick there. The end of 2019 is when this all started coming. We’re like, “This is no big deal. This is a China thing. This is not a US thing.” It was back when people were thinking back then. It came in, and we had our 2020 event planned for September. We would generally start promoting that in January. We did and started promoting it. January and February 2020, we’re promoting it, and things are starting to get a little bit dicey, and some people are signing up, but we can see that things are slowing down.

March 2020 hit and everything shut down. We’re like, “I don’t think we can do a lot of events.” It was back before that realization had settled in. Quickly we realized, “We’ve got to pivot to something different. This is going to move to virtual somehow.” We don’t know how to do virtual because we’ve been complacent. Several years of doing it live, it was always going to be that way. We never built our virtual capabilities. We had to do that real quick, pivot around, and create our first-ever virtual conference.

From 90 people in 2003, how did it grow? What was it like before the pandemic? What is it like now?

It was always, what I would consider, an intimate conference because we’re not focused on sponsorship. We’re focused on attendees. We didn’t have hundreds of sponsors and speakers. We would only have 12 or 13 speakers. We’d have maybe two sponsors, and then everybody else was attendees. We were in the 400s. We’re able to deliver a good experience to everybody that way. It was fine for us. When COVID hits, all that’s out the window. Now we’re in this whole brand-new world of virtual, and everybody is giving it away for free, and nobody wants to pay for the virtual stuff anymore.

The whole value proposition has changed. You can’t even compare it. It’s like apples to oranges. Our goal in this virtual timeframe is to continue our relationships with people and stay out there with content. I’ve been spending a lot of time on the book. We did our 2021 Brand Manage Camp back in May. Generally, we do one a year. We’re sitting back on that side and waiting to see what happens. We’ve learned that we can’t predict what’s going on. We have these ebbs and flows in terms of events. Quite honestly, my event and our event are probably among the last types of events to come back.

There are trade shows, industry, and association events. Those things where people need to get out and sell to each other are different than my event, which is a learning event. It was probably going to be among the last ones to come back to the live forum. Because so much goes into planning a live event and financial commitment, we’re waiting to see how these next few months play out before planning our next one. I took that opportunity throughout that time to write my book. I’ve been spending a lot of time doing the law enforcement stuff as well. That’s been keeping me busy.

[bctt tweet=”There’s no benefit to being treated differently. ” via=”no”]

There are going to be people reading this that have their events and have been doing them like you have and had to switch to virtual. What was it like for you to go from live to virtual? How do you think the effectiveness is virtual versus live?

There are pros and cons. I think in terms of the convenience of it, the cost of it to the end-user, and the ability to have stuff on demand and see it on your own timeframe, there’s a lot of positives there. The inability to get together in person, I think a lot is lost there. The inability to carve out your time when you’re in a live event, you put your phone on mute and out of office email answer. You sit there, listen and learn. When you’re sitting in your home or office, and you’re watching a virtual thing, there are a million other things competing for your time and attention.

It’s by nature. It’s not anybody’s fault. It’s nearly impossible to put the same amount of attention into one of those things as you do in live events. I’m still a big believer in live events. I think they’ll be back, but the way we approached it makes sense within this make sense thing. We took a step back and said, “We’re going to approach our pivot into virtual the same way we did when we first started our live conference. It was to take a look at things and figure out what’s missing. What are people getting wrong?” We sat back for a little bit and saw that a lot of people were trying to take their live events and turn them into virtual as if there was no difference other than the delivery mechanism.

The reality is that’s not true. People learn differently. People have different attention spans and do things differently. The other thing is that people were diving into this virtual world, and they did not understand the tools they were using and the best way to use them. The way that manifested itself for us is that we looked at it, and I said, “We’re going to do this virtual and have all these speakers.” We don’t typically do Q&A in the middle of a speaker session. Our speakers get up and speak for, in a live event, 50 minutes.

The first thing we said is 50 minutes is way too long. We can’t do that in a virtual world. We’re looking at 20 to 30 minutes. What I saw was that there were a lot of these people calling things in conferences that ended up looking a lot like webinars. Someone with a talking head in the corner and the whole screen was a slide, and you’re looking at the slides the whole time. We hire our speakers because they’re engaging, entertaining, and energetic. We don’t hire them for their slides. We hire them for them.

If I were doing a live event, I would never have them sit off in a corner somewhere and have everybody stare at the screen. What we did is we spent a lot of time and energy working with every one of our speakers. We prerecorded all of the sessions, but we did it with professional production. Slides coming in and out, only being shown when they needed to be shown. Having our speakers stand up, move around, be active, and do all these things that are not someone sitting in front of a webcam.

What we did is our conference platform allowed us to then have our speakers attend while we were airing their session. They could interact with attendees in the chat room and answer questions in real-time. We would bring them in on a live stream as soon as their session ended to do a live-action Q&A. This hybrid of why not prerecord so that we could guarantee the quality, everybody could hear, didn’t crap out because their internet went or something like that.

We had that guaranteed quality of the session. You have this other thing that we’ve never been able to have before live, which is a live Q&A with the speaker as the session is happening. They could clarify, expand on stories, and hear from the audience. We would carry that over, basically what you and I are doing now, into a live conversation and an interview afterward. That was pretty cool. We took this and said, “We’re going to take a look at all the information, come up with our best solution, not take what we did before and do it virtually.”

It’s a great way you did that. We had to do our annual event 2021 as well and I learned a whole lot along the way. Obviously, I saw some things that we could do better. That being one of them, that was great to hear. How did you prerecord the sessions? Did you have him show up and do it live on a stage with no audience, or was it a Zoom thing that was recorded? How did you do that?

It depended on the speaker because we only had twelve speakers or whatever speakers we had. Part of our brand is I formed my personal relationship with every one of our speakers. We don’t hire 100 speakers, and I don’t know who they are, and they do their own thing. We were able to work individually with each speaker. A couple of speakers were here in Colorado, so they were able to come over to our offices and we shot it in our studio.

Most of our speakers are all professionals, so they have their own studios and stuff. Some were able to produce themselves. We had a couple that needed a little bit more help that was more remote. We set them up with equipment. We walk them through it. We gave them all sorts of tutorials and instructions, and some of them, we had to do a couple of times to get it right. It was a mix depending on their experience level, comfort, capabilities were in terms of lighting, sound, video, and all that stuff.

BYW S4 9 | Make Sense
Make Sense: We can become so focused on the competition that we miss new competition from different industries coming in.

 

I can see how you helped them make sense of this different way to do it and created an experience that was better than expected. I’m sure you’ve allowed them beyond what they thought they were going to get in a virtual seminar or workshop.

That’s the feedback we got from folks, which was like, “This is the best virtual event we’ve been to so far.” We got a lot of that. It’s interesting because at the beginning, my immediate thought, as we were thinking this through, was, “How do we prerecord this without letting people know it’s been prerecorded?” We were going to have the speakers wear the same things when they recorded, as they did on the day they came. It took me two minutes to then figure out, “That is so disingenuine.” It’s basically a lie. I don’t want to ever lie to my customers. That was a terrible idea.

We very quickly said, “No, we’re going to be totally upfront about this, be honest, and let people know.” There were some people afterward who were like, “I was like very skeptical of this prerecorded thing. I wasn’t going to get value from it, or I should watch it later or whatever.” The way that happened, where I was able to have a conversation with the speaker and the live Q&A afterward was so much more valuable than they expected.

Tell us about your book, Be Vigilant! How did that come about? What is it? What prompted you to write it?

I’ve been working with the bestselling author for several years. I always thought I would write a book at some point, but I never had an idea that I felt was good enough or book-worthy. I didn’t want it to be a me-too book. I never did it. When I had this opportunity to become a Reserve Sheriff’s Deputy, which basically means that I’m a full-fledged police officer, I do it for free and go out on patrol. It sounds crazy.

I’m not going to let you get off the hook with this one. Why did you do that? Were you drunk one night and said, “I think I’m going to be a cop for free?”

I was trying to keep up with my wife, who’s been heavily involved in Girl Scouts. We have two daughters. For several years, she has been heavily involved in Girl Scouts beyond being a troop leader for both of my daughters and all sorts of volunteer stuff. I never had this volunteerism going on in my life. I felt like it was something that I wanted to add. I was looking for something to do. I didn’t grow up wanting to be a cop or thinking that I wanted to do that or anything like that. Honestly, it was around December of 2014 Facebook post.

We’ve got a big county. The sheriff’s office runs most of the law enforcement within this county. They put out a Facebook ad saying, “We’re looking for people to go through the Reserve Academy to become reserve sheriff’s deputies.” I was like, “That looks pretty interesting and sounds cool.” We have a unique department. This is not paraded duty or something like that. You go out and work. You do everything that a full-timer does. You do it for free. I was like, “That sounds cool.” I asked my wife, and she didn’t understand it, so she said, “Yes.”

She didn’t know what she was getting herself into at the time. I went off to this informational meeting. There were 120 people in the room. There were ex-military, ex-cops, and all these people, and most of them younger than me. I remember walking away from that and being like, “They’re never going to pick me. Why would they pick me?” I filled out the application and I got chosen, which was crazy. I had to go through all this stuff. I had to go through the same psych evaluation, physical testing, and all that stuff.

I got accepted and had to go through an academy that ran from May to November. After that, I had to do 440 hours of field training out on the road with a field training officer before I got certified to do patrol. That’s why I wanted to do it. Honestly, the other piece of this is that everybody is aware of the difficulties we’ve been having in terms of the relationship between community and law enforcement in the last couple of years. This is not new.

Back then, it was like Ferguson. That was going on. I got tired of seeing friends and acquaintances argue and complain on Facebook or whatever social media they’re on. I wanted to be part of the solution. The best way that I could see to be part of creating a great relationship between the community and law enforcement was to get involved and to do it. That’s my purpose. It’s to protect, serve and help people be safer, but also help strengthen our relationship in my little piece of the world that I can do it.

[bctt tweet=”When we don’t question things because things are going right, that’s when we miss micro-issues. ” via=”no”]

Two obvious questions that the readers are thinking about right now, and the first one being, what did your partner think when they first met you and thought you did what? You’re doing this for how much? Why the heck are you doing this? The second question is, what’s the craziest thing that’s happened to you out there so far?

When you say partner, do you mean one of the other cops?

You get into a car or whatever with your partner for the day or one that you’re doing all your hours with. They are talking to you, and they’re like, “You’re a marketer. It makes a lot of sense that you’d be in here with me. How much are they paying you for this? You’re doing it for free.”

The interesting thing is for the first six years of this, and I patrolled solo. I didn’t have a partner. I would go out and do it by myself. I would work in a district. We have eleven districts in our county. I would fill in for people who were going on vacation or short staff. We’ve started going to two-man cars for that. Before that, it was all solo stuff, but I get your question. We’re in briefing or whatever. The great thing is I spent so many hours doing it. I would spend most of my hours working on a specific team called the Swings B Team. It’s a swing shift and on the B side of the week.

In fact, the publishing company that I created for the book is Swings B Publishing because that’s my team. I got very close with those people. They consider me part of the team, but I get all the time, like, “Why are you doing this for free?” I barely want to do this for money. People get it, but they don’t get it. There’s a lot of respect. They appreciate the help are always short-staffed. They appreciate the fact that I’m there. I think they’re coming in assumption before they met me in the way that a lot of people look at it, “Here’s a guy who wants to run around with a badge, a gun and have some power,” and stuff like that.

Like anything in life, the only way to prove people wrong is to prove people wrong on it, do the job and do it as good as anybody else does it. That was always my goal. My goal was always not to be treated differently because I’m doing it for free. If I mess up, I want you to come down on me the same way you would come down on someone who’s getting paid.

At the end of the day, we’re talking about life and death on a lot of these things. There’s no benefit to being treated differently. I think that earns a lot of respect. People look at me as a regular deputy. They don’t look at me any different, but every now and then, I still get, especially on a rough day, like, “Why are you here? What are you doing? Why are you doing this?”

What’s the craziest thing that’s happened so far?

There’s been so much bad and good. Everybody has a different definition of crazy. I think the funniest thing was when I was in-field training. We got a call about a chicken crossing the road. I thought it was a joke. While part of our county is rural, the part that I work in is not rural. It’s a typical suburb. You don’t have chickens running around. We got this call about a chicken crossing the road. We were like, “This is not happening. Somebody is playing with us obviously,” but we still got to go check it out and whatever.

I get there, and lo and behold, and there’s that chicken. We were looking around for a little while, and I had to call out on the radio, “If you’re unable to locate, you’d call out UTL.” My computer started to lighten up with all the chat messages that everybody was laughing and stuff. Literally, ten seconds later, this chicken saunters across the road in front of my car. I caught that chicken and returned it to his owner. It’s not easy to catch a chicken. They’re ornery.

Hopefully, nobody had a video going while you were out there chasing a chicken.

BYW S4 9 | Make Sense
Make Sense: The more successful we are, the more complacent we become. We start believing the hype that all of our actions have led to that when, the reality is, that’s not always true.

 

My field training officer got a good picture of it. I didn’t take any video, but I got a good picture and some good ribbon. It was fun.

Tell us about your book.

Basically, I started this thing thinking it was going to be completely different than anything I’d done before, which it was because I was coming in with this lens, that’s different. I’m not a 21-year-old whose this is their first work experience or something like that. I’m a 45-year-old at that point in time who’s had 25 plus years of work experience. I can’t leave that at home. I’m definitely coming with that point of view. We started learning from the very first day how complacency kills. This is something we talk a lot about in law enforcement because 95% to 98% of our day is pretty standard and uneventful, and then things can go wrong quickly.

If you allow yourself to become comfortable, you can be in some pretty big trouble. We talk about it complacently and what it is, and how to combat it. I started thinking about how there were things that we were doing every day that we didn’t talk about in those words. There are things that we’re doing in law enforcement, too. I started making that connection. We’re doing this to keep us present and from getting complacent.

I started paying attention to the fact that complacency as a word is used a lot in culture, but it’s a throwaway word. People use it thinking that, “Let’s not get complacent out there,” or like, “They’re getting complacent to see headlines during COVID.” Nobody ever talks about what it is like, “What is it? How do you fight it?” As opposed to saying, “I’m not going to be complacent,” as if it’s that easy, but it’s not that easy.

That last piece of it, I started thinking, “Complacency in law enforcement kills businesses, brands, and personal relationships.” I saw an opportunity where I can write this book that brings some of these lessons learned and translate them into the personal and the business world to say, “What are some things that we can do every day to help us fight complacency?” The idea is that complacency is not laziness. Complacency is overconfidence, self-satisfaction, and smugness that makes us unaware of dangers and threats.

The opposite of complacency is not paranoia. A lot of people think that. I have to be looking over my shoulder all the time. No, because the opposite is not paranoia. It’s vigilance. The difference is that paranoia is based on fear, the fear of potential threats, and vigilance is based on their awareness. This book then is about how do we remain vigilant? What are specific strategies can we use to help us fight complacency every day in business and at home?

Give us an example of one.

There are ten different ones. Each one has a chapter in the book. One of the simplest ones is this idea of threat awareness, understanding where your threats could come from. One of the things that I talk about in the book is law enforcement or the military. If you’ve got anybody like that in your family or friends, we are notoriously difficult to go out to eat with because we are very specific about where we want to sit. We want to have our eyes on where the potential threats could be. Not because we’re paranoid, but because we want to be able to see what’s coming if we have to.

The parallel to that in business in life is how do you get a 360-degree view of your threats? How do you look beyond the overconfidence that you have in terms of what your threats are? A lot of times in business, someone was asking you who your competitors are, and you can rattle off 2 or 3 right away and what your strategies are against them. I would start to think maybe you’re a little bit complacent because you’re getting that tunnel vision. You’re focusing and becoming what I would call the roadrunner effect.

Wile E. Coyote becomes so focused on the Road Runner, but what gets Wile E. Coyote every time is never the Road Runner. It’s always something else. That can happen to us. We can become so focused on the competition as we’ve defined it that we miss the new competition. We miss different industries coming into our industry. The same thing can happen at home.

[bctt tweet=”The unfortunate reality is businesses only do debriefing things when things go wrong.” via=”no”]

We could become overconfident that we understand what’s happening in our life, that things blindside us. They feel like they blindsided us, but they haven’t. They’ve been coming for a long time. We didn’t have eyes on them. I have a whole chapter where I talk about threat awareness and how do you build that threat awareness. How do you do it not in a paranoid way, but in an awareness way?

I’ll give you one more. Another one that I talk a lot about is debriefing. We all know the brief and the debrief. We all do some level of the briefing, whether it be weekly meetings or one-on-ones, or whatever it is. If you talk to most people in business and you ask them, “Do you guys do debriefs now?” They might say yes, but the reality is they’re debriefing things when things go wrong, there’s blame to find, or some disasters happen. We got to figure out why.

What we do in law enforcement that doesn’t happen a lot in the business or personal life is we debrief big things, whether they were successful or a failure. At the end of a mission or something of importance, we’ll sit down and say, “What went right? What went wrong? What went right? What went right by accident, because our competition or whoever we’re against made a mistake and we benefited from it?” When we don’t question things because things are going right, that’s when we miss these little micro issues that are coming up.

That’s where we miss these things that we have the ability to fix early before they become something bigger. I talk a lot about the value of debriefing in terms of fighting complacency because the biggest thing that leads to vulnerability from complacency is a success, ironically. The more successful we are, the more complacent we become. We start believing the hype. We are successful because of everything that we’ve done. All of our actions have led to that.

When the reality is, that’s not always true. In Denver, I would tell people, “Be a Peyton Manning. He got the Ring of Fame in the Bronco Stadium,” or anywhere else in the rollout, I’ll tell you to be a Tom Brady. Neither one of those guys, at the end of a win, sit back and say, “We’re going to party until next week.” Every one of them immediately will start thinking about what could we have done differently? What could we have done better? What are some vulnerabilities that maybe our competition didn’t take advantage of because they didn’t see them, but the next time somebody will see them?

Debriefing is a great way. You can do it with your family too and at home. How many times do you only talk to your kids when things go wrong? They get a bad grade, stay out too late, get into an accident with the car. How many times do we sit down and say, “What went right? You got a B+ on a test. That’s awesome. How can we get it to an A? What can we emulate? What can we build on?” We don’t do enough of that. Talk about our successes and try and find learnings in them. That’s another way to fight complacency with vigilance.

The last question I always ask people is what is the best piece of advice you’ve ever received or the best piece of advice you’ve ever given?

I’ll give you two pieces of advice. One of them is from a guy by the name of Bruce Turkel. He is a speaker I’ve worked with. He’s written a couple of different books and wrote a cool book that came out called Is That All There Is?, which is pretty awesome. The thing was from a previous book and it was this idea that it’s all about them. The concept that I think a lot of us mess up with both in life and business is making it about us when it should be about them, our customers, our constituents, our vendors, and our employees. When we’re marketing our products and services, are we telling people what we want them to hear? Are we telling them what they want to hear and what they need to hear?

It’s that nuance in terms of making sure you’re always thinking about things in terms of making it all about them and not all about me. It’s something I think has been great for me. I come back to it a lot. In terms of whenever I’m putting together materials for people to read, or writing my book, or whatever, how has this for them, as opposed to what I want people to hear? It’s the difference between doing a presentation at work filled with 100 slides of all the work you did because you need everybody to know all the work you did as opposed to the two slides of the conclusions because that’s what the people in the room need.

If they want to hear about all the work that he did, they can come to get that later. That, to me, is a great mantra for a lot of different things in life. The other one was when I was back working at Coca-Cola, there was a guy named Steven Boyd. He told me this thing, “One is a dot, two is a line, three is a trend.” It’s something I go back to a lot in terms of making sure I don’t read too much into one-off events, and when I’m making decisions is based on an actual pattern and not based on something that’s an anomaly or something like that. In life, especially in this world that we live in now, people are way too quick to react to things without understanding. Is it a dot, line, or trend?

I’m going to ask you, people who are reading this say, “I like Len. I like what he’s about. I totally agree with his book, and how do I get ahold of him? How can I work with him? How can I go to his event?” What’s the best way to connect with you?

[bctt tweet=”The biggest thing that leads to vulnerability from complacency is success.  ” via=”no”]

The best way is to go to my website, LenHerstein.com. It’s got everything about me and my book. If you’re interested in a conference, you can go to BrandManageCamp.com. That’s the conference. If you’re interested in the book and where you can buy it, you can get it on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, anywhere you buy books online. You can get it there, but if you want to learn more about me, what the book is about, and get some free swag, too, go over to LenHerstein.com.

Len, thank you so much for taking the time to be here. I enjoyed our conversation. Hopefully, I don’t see you in your sheriff’s gear anytime soon because I do go by you all the time.

I don’t work the highways a lot, so if you’re staying on a highway, you should be good. I appreciate you having me on. The other thing I forgot to mention is that I encourage anybody out there to reach out and connect with me on LinkedIn. I love connecting with people on LinkedIn. We can have one-on-one conversations there. Thanks for having me, Gary. This is awesome. Thanks for letting me go through the process of figuring out what my why is. I have a whole chapter in my book about why, purpose, and all this stuff. It’s such a great connection for me. This is a different use of it, but I love it. It’s spot on.

Thanks, Len. I appreciate you.

Thank you.

It’s time for our segment, Guess their WHY. Instead of using Walt Disney, I’m going to use his brother, Roy. If you know anything about Disneyland and Disney World and Disney, Walt was the visionary. He was the why guy, but if he didn’t have his brother, Roy, nothing would have gotten done. You have a guy with a lot of ideas but not the ability to implement them. He brought along with him his brother, Roy, who wasn’t an idea guy, but he was an implementer. He took all of the ideas, concepts, and thoughts that Walt came up with and made them happen, creating structure, processes, and systems around getting things done.

What would you guess, Roy Disney’s why is? Think about that for a minute. For me, I believe that Roy’s why was to do things the right way in order to get results. People with that why are structure, process, systems people. They take ideas and build a structure around them, making them happen predictably and consistently so that people have a predictable, consistent experience. That’s what’s so great about Disney World and Disneyland is you get a consistent, predictable experience every time you go there.

It’s done around vision and the thinking of Walt Disney but done in the way that Roy created so that people love the experience they have. That’s what I think. Let me know what you think. Thank you so much for reading. If you’ve not yet discovered your why, you can go to WHYInstitute.com, use the code PODCAST 50, and you can get it for half price. We do that to thank you for reading. If you love the show, please don’t forget to subscribe, leave us a review, and rating on whatever platform you’re using. Thank you so much. I will see you next episode. Have a great week.

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About Len Herstein

BYW S4 9 | Make SenseLen Herstein has over 30 years of experience in business and brand marketing. Prior to founding his marketing and events company (ManageCamp Inc.), Len innovated, managed,and grew brands for major consumer packaged goods marketers, including Campbell SoupCompany, Coca-Cola, and Nabisco.Since 2015, Len has served as a reserve deputy sheriff with the Douglas County Sheriff’s Office in Colorado

 

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Podcast

The WHY Of Make Sense: Unlocking Your Best Self By Finding Your Genius With Mike Zeller

BYW S4 8 | Find Your Genius

If you want to find your genius, you need to figure out who you are and what you’re amazing at. Once you find that you can put yourself in a position where you can succeed the most. Life gives you so many clues on how to find your genius, like a murder mystery, you just need to find and organize them. This is your zone of genius. Dr. Gary Sanchez’s guest, Mike Zeller exemplifies the WHY of make sense. Mike is a business architect and entrepreneur mentor who helps professionals find their zone of genius. He is the founder of Symposia Mastermind and is the author of “The Genius Within“. Learn how to find greater clarity in yourself so that you can be in your zone of genius. Learn what the WHY of make sense means for Mike today!

Watch the episode here:

Listen to the podcast here:

The WHY Of Make Sense: Unlocking Your Best Self By Finding Your Genius With Mike Zeller

Welcome to the show where we go beyond just talking about your WHY, and helping you discover and live your WHY. If you’re a regular, you know that every week, we talk about one of the nine WHYs. We bring on somebody with that WHY so we can see how their WHY has played out in their life. In this episode, we’re going to be talking about the WHY of Make Sense or to make sense of the complex and challenging.

If this is your WHY then you are driven to solve problems and resolve challenging or complex situations. You have an uncanny ability to take in lots of data and information. You tend to observe situations and circumstances around you and sort through them quickly to create solutions that are sensible and easy to implement. Often, you are viewed as an expert because of your unique ability to find solutions quickly. You also have a gift for articulating solutions and summarizing them clearly in understandable language. You believe that many people are stuck and that if they could make sense out of their situation, they could develop simple solutions and move forward. In essence, you help people get unstuck and move forward by helping them solve their problems.

I’ve got a great guest for you. His name is Mike Zeller. He is a business architect and entrepreneur mentor. He helps professionals find their zone of genius and rewrite their subconscious to fuel momentum towards life’s purpose. He has mentored over 200 high-level entrepreneurs from all over the world, helping add tens of millions in revenue to his clients. An entrepreneur himself, he has founded or partnered in over twenty ventures across multiple industries including technology, real estate, digital marketing and more.

Collectively, his businesses have achieved more than $100 million in sales in the last several years. He partners his business strategy with a heavy emphasis on social entrepreneurism, including one venture that gave away $300,000 in cars to single mothers in need. Mike has trained under masters of the industry such as Tony Robbins, Russell Brunson and Jay Abraham. As a master NLP practitioner, he uses his core methodology to help entrepreneurs and creatives get unstuck from emotional roadblocks to become more fully integrated and build unstoppable momentum. He has been featured in Business Insider, Forbes Coaches Council, Thrive Global, Huffington Post, and on Fox Radio. Mike, welcome to the show.

Gary, I’m excited to be here. After that intro, I sound a lot more impressive than I feel.

It sounds like you have done a lot of things. Where I think we should start is take us back through your life, maybe back to even when you were in high school. Where did you grow up? How did you get on this path of entrepreneurism and end up where you are now? Let’s start back there.

I was in love with baseball in high school. I was devoted to becoming a professional baseball player at one point. That’s where self-discipline, desire, hunger and that fuel to challenge myself grew. My dad was an immigrant from Germany with an eighth-grade education. He moved to America, not speaking a word of English during post World War II. He was born in 1940. His parents were anti-Hitler but they still had to have a picture of Hitler hanging in their house. Otherwise, they could be arrested by the Gestapo and a lot worse could happen to them. They had a picture of Hitler hanging in the back door in a closet. If someone came in, they could say, “We have our picture of Hitler in the back.” I learned this story from my dad.

BYW S4 8 | Find Your Genius
Find Your Genius: People need to find their genius. There are clues scattered throughout their lives. The challenge is most people haven’t organized and synthesized those clues yet.

If I go back to some of the roots and things that are imprinted upon us that you don’t even realize where they come from, my dad was eligible for nutrition deficient camps. Even though he was a German boy and his parents had a general store, which is a precursor to grocery stores. He came over to America with this hardiness and this resilience where they had one serving of meat a week. They would have potatoes, vegetables and things like that.

I’m not terribly old or anything like that but when I was growing up, he taught us a lot of that. He taught us to be resilient, disciplined, frugal, hardworking and industrious. I got a lot of that, but he was also self-employed at the time I was growing up. He owned and raised harness horses and was one of the best in the country, so I wanted to eventually be self-employed. Eventually, I knew I was meant to be an entrepreneur. I thought I was going to be in the restaurants. I got into real estate and started building a mini real estate empire.

At age 32, I listened to Tony Robbins’ Personal Power II. He talks about doing incantations and affirmations. My seventh affirmation was that I mentor and lead some of the brightest and best people in the world. I was like, “I don’t know how I’m going to do that. All I’m doing now is real estate.” I was like, “I’m supposed to write this down.”

Three years later, I had started at that point six more businesses. After a mini-sabbatical in Buenos Aires, Argentina that was inspired by The 4-Hour Workweek, I started getting tons of people reaching out for mentorship and coaching. My first paid client at the time was doing $25 million a year in eComm. He’s the cofounder of iHeartDogs. I loved it and felt like I need to figure out a way to make this viable and make sense in helping entrepreneurs grow. That’s a long story.

You were early on into sports. That was your thing. Did you go off to college or no college?

I went to college. I went to a private liberal arts school and played baseball in college for a bit. I am still very attuned to sports. I’m hosting a Clubhouse room called The Sons and Daughters of Hall of Famers. Jim Brown’s daughter is coming on, Gill Russell’s daughter, Sugar Ray Leonard’s son, Joe Montana’s son might come and share. I love the game of sports.

That will be interesting because the pressure that’s got to be on the son or daughter of a legend has got to be intense. I’m fortunate that I had two daughters and I didn’t get to put pressure on them to be these amazing athletes because that wasn’t in their makeup. I realized that quickly when I was coaching soccer to five-year-old girls. I turned to put my daughter in the game and she’s down at the end of the field chasing a butterfly. I realized all this pressure that I could apply to be a great athlete is not going to apply to them. What was the first business that you got into?

[bctt tweet=”You can’t find your genius without knowing your values and weaknesses.” via=”no”]

Besides a couple of network marketing businesses, I would say real estate investing. I’ve built on a little real estate portfolio.

Who got you into that? Why did you pick that of all the things that you could have picked why real estate investing?

One of my mentors at the time shared with me Carleton Sheets’ No Down Payment Program. It says, “97% of America’s millionaires made their millions in real estate.” It was one of his core premises. Whether that’s true or not, I don’t know but I got in the game. I loved the power of leverage, the tax write-offs, and all the other things that come with real estate. I’m a big believer in real estate.

It was interesting when I listened to your story, the quick version of it. It’s very similar to my path. I did Tony Robbins’ Personal Power when I was in my twenties. I took the No Down Payment course. I took a lot of those same things. It’d be interesting to see if most entrepreneurs were on that same path. I saw some different multilevel marketing things way back in the day. I quickly learned that maybe that wasn’t the best way. You probably figured out it didn’t make much sense.

I didn’t want everyone that I talked to be a prospect of my downline.

You didn’t want them to scatter when you walked in?

Yeah, exactly.

BYW S4 8 | Find Your Genius
Find Your Genius: Your genius is where you can be one of the best in your marketplace. This has to be deeply aligned with your values, life experiences, relationships, and strengths.

What kind of real estate were you involved with?

It is mostly residential. We did a few flips but frankly, the flips were hard. Even though Nashville is a great market, it is still a very hard market to make good margins on. I eventually owned an office building. I had an office building that was sold in 2020. I loved investing and I still do. Besides cryptocurrency, that’s the thing I want to heavily invest in over the next twenty years, as well as other companies.

You jump in there, figure out the best way to do it, do that for a little while, and then onto the next.

One of the things that I started noticing, especially as I reflect back, is I have 4 or 5 friends that have $100 million-plus real estate portfolios. I didn’t love the game as they did, but I loved other things that they maybe don’t understand or get to. When we go into finding your genius, I think there are clues scattered throughout our lives. The challenge is most of us haven’t organized and synthesized the clues that, “You’re a genius over here and you’re not so much a genius over here. In fact, you suck over here.” We have some basic understanding of those things but you have to get even more precise. One of the fundamentals, as I look back at my entrepreneurial journey, is that I see over and over that those people who accomplish extraordinary things put themselves in extraordinarily right positions. I think there are clues in your life, my life, and everyone’s life as well.

I bet you see scenarios where they put themselves in situations where they weren’t living their genius. How long can somebody take that? You did real estate for a while and then jumped into it by accident. It sounds like personal growth, mentoring and helping other people achieve their success. In that area, is that where you learned about the zone of genius?

One of the businesses that I started when I came back from Buenos Aires was a socially-minded car dealership. We had a goal that was twofold. It’s to create the most ethical, honest, straightforward, and the best value car buying experience in the Southeast, which we did. Every car we sold helped us give away another car to a single mother in need. We gave away over $300,000 worth of cars. We started a digital marketing agency that was designed to help my businesses and other businesses grow and stretch. Another venture was the men’s fashion line, then a sustainable fashion line, and then an office/coworking space.

I started asking myself, “What parts of the business am I good at?” I also started getting clues about what parts of the business I’m not so good at, which are some operations, legal, administrative tax sides. I hate those things. It’s not in my wheelhouse. I can do them and I can discipline myself, but only for so long. I get bored and I want to go over here and create something else. I lost over $1 million as well.

[bctt tweet=”To know thyself is the beginning of all wisdom. If you can master yourself, you can master the game of life.” via=”no”]

After I had all this growth, doing $30 million a year in revenue, I personally lost over $1 million in a pretty short time period in 2018. It sideswiped me because I was playing out of my position so much. I realized that my genius had gotten me to a certain level but I didn’t have the right partners, collaborators, etc. Now I had more people asking as well as I was getting more advice-seekers approaching me. I’m like, “I can’t tell you where and what you should do without knowing your values, strengths and weaknesses.” I thought, “All the personality tests gave us different clues.” I loosely created a process to organize and synthesize the clues.

You figured it out. You made sense of this complex thing called, “What’s my genius?”

I’ve got the most complete process ever created for someone who is hungry to figure out their genius more precisely. I’ve yet to find someone that doesn’t have a massive breakthrough when they do the whole thing.

How do you define your genius?

My genius is where I can be one of the best in the world or best in the marketplace that’s deeply aligned with my values, life experiences, relationships and my strengths. It’s those four pillars. We all have webs of relationships. Our network is our net worth, some might say. The third thing is our defining life experiences. Why does someone who goes through the same university or goes through the same experience in terms of the same education or whatever do something radically different?

If we look back at Elon Musk or Jeff Bezos, why are they both in a race for space? They were fascinated with space in their teenage years and wanted to do something. They dreamed of going to outer space. One of my favorite stories is about Theodore Roosevelt. At the age of 22 or 23, unfortunately, his first wife dies giving birth and his mom dies 24 hours later. He’s like, “I can’t take it.” He was a politician at the time, a Congressman or something. He let his aunt raise his daughter for the next six months because he’s like, “What am I going to do with an infant? I’m a rough rider type personality.”

He goes out West to North Dakota and South Dakota. He camps, hunts and lives in the wilderness for months. Fast forward many years later, he becomes the President of the US. He preserves the national parks. He preserves more natural acreage and is a bigger advocate for wildlife than any other president we’ve ever had because of those types of experiences.

BYW S4 8 | Find Your Genius
Find Your Genius: The universe is made up of waves. The challenge is to create a new pattern or wave. You can do this by creating new perspectives and new perspectives create aha moments.

The first thing was unique talents, the second thing was your important relationships, and then the third was your life experiences. What was the fourth again?

It’s values and passions. What do I stand for and what do I stand against? What lights me up? What am I insatiably curious about? They all give clues. The goal is you synthesize and organize all the clues. They are scattered throughout. If you get them all on one table or one worksheet in my case, now you have all these clues organized and you can see patterns emerge. You’ve probably read Jim Collins’ Good to Great book, Built to Last and all that. What is it? Jim gathered a bunch of data and he didn’t go in assuming certain things. He had some guesses but he looked in and said, “What patterns are going to emerge from the data, about the companies when they went from good to great.” There were some patterns that he didn’t even expect.

What happens is you have greater certainty and greater clarity. One of my clients that I took through a whole day session on it is a former executive of the federal government. She’s retiring and she’s had as many as 80,000 employees underneath her. She said, “Mike, this is one of the biggest a-ha moments in my 34-year career. She went through the process even though she is pretty self-aware. She spent tens of thousands of dollars with coaching programs. She read countless books. She gets up at 4:30 AM. She does her disciplines and things like that. Socrates said, “To know thyself is the beginning of all wisdom.” If you can master yourself, you can master the game of life.

What was the turning point for you? Why did you decide to go on this path?

I remember when I first became a man of faith in college. I became a Christian in my junior year. I remember speaking and organizing an event. I was like, “I think my purpose in life is to unleash people’s God-given potential.” I did ministry for a while but I felt like, “I’m not supposed to be in ministry.”

What made you believe that?

It was almost like a divine download. I had a whisper. Sometimes in life, we get whispers and nudges. It doesn’t have to be audible. It’s just, “There was something meaningful here. I’m supposed to connect with this person.” When I was 21 years old, I was mentoring college students. One of the guys I was mentoring was two years younger than me. He says to me one day, “Mike, you’re the best mentor I’ve ever had.” I was like, “Wow.” His dad was a bestselling leadership author. His dad was pretty legit and way far ahead of me. I was like, “That’s pretty awesome.”

[bctt tweet=”The phrase, ‘I am’ is very powerful because it’s a declaration that moves your body to where you want to go.” via=”no”]

When you get connected to your heart and spirit, you get clarity if you’re willing to still yourself, still the outside noise and listen. Tune yourself and ask yourself. Your body doesn’t lie. If I take this pen right here and I put my hand down and I try to stab it, my body will not stab itself unless I’ve somehow bypassed it. A Navy SEAL might be able to bypass it but I can’t bypass that very easily because our body is designed not to harm itself. Our body is also very honest, but most of us are attuned to our mind more than our body. Our minds can lie and it lies all the time. We get all these word tracks, wounds, stories and false beliefs.

I have a Claim Your Power Meditation on YouTube that you go through and you get more connected to yourself, your weak-ass self and your most powerful self. You release the weak-ass version of you from controlling and guiding your life. It’s all about asking your heart and your body. What is the name of your badass self? I’ve got Magic Mike, and I’ve got Weak-ass Willie. Magic Mike is more powerful, I promise you that.

You create your own name for the badass version of yourself and then you put that one on your shoulder or what? How do you use your badass self?

We’re both sports fans. We know Kobe Bryant had Black Mamba. Bo Jackson had a guy named Jason from Friday the 13th. He’s a nice guy off the field but when he’s on the field, he’s going to run over and destroy people. It’s how he thinks. You flip into a different mentality. One of the early clients that I worked with on this was a big Instagram influencer. She had 600,000 followers on Instagram. We sat down for twenty minutes in our session. We were out in LA and she breaks down in tears. She said, “Mike, I’m completely stuck on my message.” I’m like, “What am I going to do? I got a crying girl in my hands.” I realized, “I can take her through this process.”

I took her through the process and I got her connected to Oprah Winfrey. I asked her, “Who do you admire who knows their message?” “Oprah Winfrey.” I had her visualize experiencing, being and delivering a message as Oprah. By the end of that, we go back to her. She’s created a whole new brainwave. We’ve got wavelengths. The universe is made up of waves, sound waves and light waves. As entrepreneurs, what are we? We’re up and down. It’s a roller coaster to some extent. Our women have a cycle and it’s a 30-day cycle. They’re up and down. There’s a time of the month they’re crazy and want chocolate. The universe is made up of waves.

The challenge is to create a new pattern or a new wave. In that Law of Physics, an object in motion stays in motion unless acted upon by an outside source. We can create new patterns and new waves with new perspectives. New perspectives create a-has. Why did the founder of Red Bull discover Red Bull when he’s in Thailand? He’s tired and he has a big meeting. He asked the taxi driver to pull over so he could run in and get an energy drink. The taxi driver says, “Get this Red Bull. It’s good.” He goes down and gets a Red Bull can or whatever with a little Red Bull on it. It is something similar to what it is now. He was like, “This works.” He comes back and creates that brand. He was in a different brainwave, pattern and perspective. I help people create new patterns around finding their genius and anchoring to their most powerful identity.

When they have their most powerful identity, they can use that as a sounding board. How do they use it once they have their badass self?

BYW S4 8 | Find Your Genius
Find Your Genius: Don’t let a thought or pattern that doesn’t serve who you actually are, stay in your mind. You can let them come in, but do not let them build a nest.

I’ll give you an example. One of my clients is Renee Batten. She’s a former Army veteran or a Navy veteran. She’s a powerhouse woman who has written a bunch of books. Her alter ego is Barbuda. We were talking and in many parts of her business, she’s doubled and tripled her income since working together but she hadn’t made some leaps up in our marketing. I was like, “Renee, who’s leading your marketing department? Is it Barbuda or is it Renee?” She’s like, “It’s not Barbuda. It’s Renee.” Barbuda leads with power, magnificence, strength and courage. She doesn’t play small. You have different energy. It’s the beauty of the human mind that is different from the animal kingdom.

I remember when my dad made us watch animal shows. You see a wildebeest getting caught by some lions and then all of a sudden, it somehow escapes the jaws of the lion and runs off. The lion is too tired to chase it down. Two minutes later, it’s eating grass. You’re like, “Mr. Wildebeest, what the heck’s wrong with you? You were just in the jaws of a lion and now you’re eating grass.” We wouldn’t do that. If we almost die, we’re not eating a sandwich two minutes later because our minds are different.

In the animal kingdom, their minds are designed to release energy faster. I’m studying trauma a lot. Healing from Trauma is a great book that talks a little bit about this. As humans, we hold on to it. We also have the superpower of we can transport our minds into a different space with imagination and creativity. If we can do that, then we will lead and create from a radically different space.

Our marriages and relationships can be different. We unlock our divine human potential in a different way. That’s why I think this higher version of ourselves that’s within us is the real version. Sometimes we’re like, “If I step up here and I imagine myself there, that’s the imposter.” No, your current reality is most likely your imposter. What if we flip the perspective? What if my current reality or the one that wants to play small, the one that wants to hide, the one that wants to not go for it is the false version?

Once you have defined what the real version of you is and named, then you can step into that?

What I do is I have people write out, “How does this version of you walk and talk? What is this version of you wearing? Are they wearing hand-me-downs pre-owned clothes? Are they wearing Gucci or whatever they are wearing? What type of music does that version of you listen to?” Do you do affirmations?

Yeah.

[bctt tweet=”Figure out who you are and where you’re amazing at. Then you can put yourself in a position where you can succeed the most.” via=”no”]

I start my day off with, “I am Magic Mike. I am a wealth magnet. I am attracting, earning and saving millions of dollars. I am worthy of extraordinary.” I’ve got 2 minutes and 22 seconds of affirmations of declaring “I am,” even though some of those things have not happened fully yet, but I’m speaking where I want to go. Our words are our commands so I speak those into existence based on my zone of genius partly as well, then they are in alignment.

I’m designed to be a creator and not an accumulator like Warren Buffett. The Wealth Dynamics test is one of my favorite personality tests. It shows you your natural pathway to wealth. If I’m creating and building in alignment, the powerful phrase “I am” subtly commands your body to move in that direction with energy and music. I like energy and music. It changes our brain waves as well.

Tell us about Magic Mike versus Weak-ass Willie. When did that transition happen from Weak-ass Willie to Magic Mike? What was that like for you?

Both of them still show up. Weak-ass Willie is when I lost a lot of money and then I had all these people I had to pay and all these things. I had some significant shame around that. I had my tail between my legs. I’m not going to take care of what I need to take care of if Weak-ass Willie is leading my life. I started creating that alter ego of Magic Mike. I had a client call me Magic Mike because of the magic I was creating in her life. I said, “What does Magic Mike do? How does it lead? How can you show up more before I go into meetings or podcasts interviews, and before I do this or this?”

I’m like, “Do I want Magic Mike to lead or do I want Weak-ass Willie?” When Weak-ass Willie shows up, I’ll literally say, “Thank you for sharing your good desire.” It’s always for protection and wanting to keep me from harm. I’m like, “I see you and I hear you but I’ve got to advance. I’ve got to be on the offensive and lead. I can’t retreat. “Thank you. Magic Mike, you take the reins, drive the car, drive the bus in my life. Let’s roll.”

It is very much like sports.

It goes down into visualization, commanding, reinforcing and not letting a thought or pattern that doesn’t serve who you are and how you want to show up stay in your mind long. We all have them come in, but do we let them build a nest in a home?

BYW S4 8 | Find Your Genius
Find Your Genius: Greater clarity leads to greater confidence. Greater confidence leads to a greater conviction. Greater conviction leads to greater courage. Then you will have higher-level commitments to yourself and others.

It’s I can’t versus I can. I was a world champion in racquetball and at every level that I went through at every stage, I faced the “Am I really good enough?” You have to overcome that by believing it. What worked when you were at a lower level does not work when you get to the next level, which does not work when you get to the next level, so you’ve got to reinvent.

You’ve had to do that a few times in your career. I imagine you’ve gotten closer as well to your genius and to your purpose. There is always more to unpack using the lessons of our wins and failures.

What I like about what you’ve done is that you’ve figured it out. You’ve codified what people were doing that found success versus what people were doing that didn’t find success. You said, “This is what these people are doing. Let me show you what the heck they’re doing so it makes sense to you and then you can go do it.”

It’s do-it in your own unique way and your own unique path. The other thing that’s cool about this process is when you do it, now you’re going to have even more deep alignment. If you’re resolved and convicted in your spirit, you show up more courageously. You show up with greater confidence and greater commitment. It all starts with clarity. It’s the first of the five Cs. Greater clarity leads to greater confidence. Greater confidence leads to a greater conviction. With a greater conviction, we show up with more courage, then we make higher-level commitments to ourselves and others.

I’m sure there are a lot of people reading right now that are in that stage themselves where they are making that shift or the transition from what they were doing to what they wanted to do, and it’s scary. It’s sometimes easier to write it out and play small. If you’re talking to them right now, they’re reading and they’re teetering on, “Should I go for it? Should I not go for it?” What is the first step they should take?

Socrates is one of the wisest men who ever lived. He mentored Plato and Aristotle who gave us in essence, Western Civilization, the philosophy of democracy, and the capitalistic system as well, and human growth and human potential. He said, “To know thyself is the beginning of all wisdom.” King David said in Proverbs 16:32, “It’s better to have self-control than to conquer a city.” Another wise man, Dee Hock, the Founder of Visa. When he started writing for Harvard Business Review, he found the very best leaders in the world and did something that ordinary leaders did not. That was that they focused more than 50% of their leadership energy on leading themselves.

Back to what I said before, “Extraordinary results are predicated not necessarily by the most extraordinary people but people being in extraordinarily right positions.” You think of a great sports team. They are extraordinarily aligned. Why will the Brooklyn Nets probably never win an NBA championship with Kevin Durant and James Harden consistently? They don’t have a complementary team. They got two great stars but it’s not aligned with the rest of the team.

[bctt tweet=”Spend 30 minutes a day reading. That way, you start your day off with some fuel in the tank.” via=”no”]

Extraordinary success comes down to people being in extraordinarily right positions. If you get yourself more in the right position, which I think that’s where I had another client go through the test and the course before I had the book out. She was like, “Mike, I would have doubled my salary if I had gone through this first because I would have had so much greater clarity around where I kicked butt and I would have asked for more.” She renegotiated her salary after being at the job for a month.

Figure out who you are and where you are amazing because you can put yourself in a position where you can succeed the most. I would say pick up the book because it guides you through the whole process but go through the personality tests. The reason I’d take people through five personality tests is they all give you different clues. They measure different behaviors and strengths. Doing the other inventories around relationships and defining life moments also give you other layers of clues. The more layers of clues, the more patterns you will see.

Once you know yourself, then making decisions is easier, and then you have clarity, confidence, conviction, courage and commitment. That’s exactly what we believe. The first step is self-awareness and the first step in self-awareness is knowing your WHY because once you know your WHY, all the rest makes sense and fits together. In your case, we know you are somebody who believes in making sense of complex and challenging things. You’ve done that in every area of your life all the way along, from being the guy that helped people through their problems when you were young, to the person that’s continually doing it now. You did it in real estate and you did it all the way along in your journey.

Knowing that, we could predict that you’re eventually going to figure something special out, and you did. You took something that is complex, challenging and overwhelming. I have no idea what to do and I don’t know where to turn,” and you said, “Let me hold your hand for a second. Here’s where you go. Here’s your step. Figure yourself out and then we’ll figure the rest out.” I got one last question for you before we go there. What’s the best piece of advice that you’ve ever been given or that you ever gave someone?

Something that changed my world was when I was nineteen years old. I went to Peter Lowe’s Success Seminar. I heard guys like Zig Ziglar, Colin Powell and all those legends of afar. One of them said, “Spend 30 minutes a day reading. Do it in the first part of your day. Do it in the morning. That way, you start your day off with some fuel in the tank. You put some deposits in your bank account.” I’ve done that in every season of life since then. I’ve read 1,500 books now. I love learning and growing. As a result, I can honestly say that I mastered a lot of different subjects.

There is another guy, Brian Tracy, when I was twenty years old in the middle of a finals week. He said at his seminar, “If you read a book a month in your chosen field, you’ll be an expert in three years. That’s 36 books.” I was like, “I don’t want to wait three years.” I’m a little more impatient. I was like, “I’m going to master a subject in one year.” The first one I mastered and worked on was leadership, sales and marketing, spirituality, relationships, human psychology and all those others.

Choosing a field and becoming a bonafide expert goes far. You want to learn, lean into that and become a master. Don’t be a dabbler. You can dabble in some things and that’s okay. That’s experimentation, but choose a handful of things to become a master at. Once you master something else and you want to explore and master something else, master that. The top one-percenters earn disproportionately more than everyone else. We all can be one-percenters. If that’s 36 books, you can read 36 books in a subject and not take yourself up but apply it. That’s was the best advice I’ve ever received.

BYW S4 8 | Find Your Genius
The Genius Within: Your Natural Pathway To Impact, Fulfillment, & Wealth

One of my mentors says it this way. He says, “Learn less and study more.” It’s pretty much what you said. You don’t need 500 books on 500 subjects, take one subject and go 500 books deep, and then you become the master. If there are people that are reading and they’re like, “I love what Mike had to say. How do I get ahold and work with him?” What’s the best way to connect with you? What would work best for you?

If you want a free Six-Step Guide To Finding Your Genius, I’ve got a free six-step guide. You can text Genius U to 474747. You’ll get a link to opt-in and get that PDF. Also, GeniusWithinBook.com or it’s on Amazon. I’m @TheMikeZeller on Instagram, Facebook, LinkedIn, YouTube, and MikeZeller.com as well. It’s a pleasure being on your show, Gary. I love your approach and am excited for this next chapter of your life as well.

I’m so glad you were here. Thank you for taking the time and I look forward to staying in touch. As you come through Albuquerque, look me up and we’ll go get some Mexican food here.

That would be great. I love it.

Thanks.

In our last segment of Guess the WHY, I want us to think about Patrick Mahomes. He is the quarterback for the Kansas City Chiefs. They won the Super Bowl and had a great year in 2020, and not such a great year in 2021, but I’m sure it’s going to end better for him. What do you think Patrick Mahomes’ WHY is? He’s the guy that can throw the sidearms and can run and passes well. He seems to think faster than everybody else. He always seems one step ahead.

For me, his WHY is the same as our guest’s, Mike Zeller, which is to make sense of the complex and challenging. So much comes his way but he quickly synthesizes it. He quickly gets on the right path, makes a decision and makes it happen. That’s what people with the WHY of Makes Sense do. Thank you, all. If you’ve not yet discovered your WHY, you can do so at WHYInstitute.com. Use the code PODCAST50 and you can get it for half price. If you love the show, please don’t forget to subscribe, leave us a review and a rating on whatever platform you’re using. Thank you and I will see you next episode.

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About Mike Zeller

Mike Zeller is a business architect and entrepreneur mentor who helps professionals find their zone of genius and rewire their subconscious to fuel momentum toward their life’s purpose. He has mentored over two hundred high-level entrepreneurs from all over the world, helping add tens of millions in revenue to his clients.
An entrepreneur himself, Mike has founded or partnered in over 20 ventures across multiple industries, including technology, real estate, digital marketing, and more. Collectively, his businesses have achieved more than $100 million in sales in the last 10 years. He partners  his business strategy with a heavy emphasis on social entrepreneurism,  including one venture that gave away $300,000+ in cars to single  mothers in need.
Mike has trained under masters of the industry such as Tony Robbins,  Russell Brunson, and Jay Abraham. A master NLP practitioner, he uses  this core methodology to help entrepreneurs and creatives get unstuck  from emotional roadblocks to become more fully integrated and build  unstoppable momentum. Mike has been featured in Business Insider,  Forbes Coaches Council, Thrive Global, Huffington Post, and on Fox  Radio.