So there we were. Me, a Trust, just wanting to be heard and listened to while sharing what happened during my day. However, what he heard, was an opportunity to try and solve the problem. I was only sharing my frustration with a coworker and he immediately began to divulge routes I could take to solve this. The desire to solve problems is compulsive for someone with the WHY of Make Sense. It is their gift to the world, and is important to understand that, even though this may not be what you are asking for in that moment.
Sometimes all you need is a little support
At times they may seem a little bit more rigid than they mean to be. Because Make Sense people are so intelligent they may not understand why someone else isn’t “getting it” when it came so easy for them. This can cause some friction in relationships when they are spelling out something for you and you may not be understanding or asking for a quick fix, but rather were looking for support. You will need to let them know ahead of time whether what you are telling them requires their help or if this is a venting session – as they simply can’t help themselves from trying to solve. Make sure to remember they aren’t belittling what you are saying or don’t think you can figure it out on your own, they are just trying to help you.
What they provide
In a relationship a Make Sense person does bring a lot to the table. They bring the ability to help, not in a Contribute way, but in their own way. When you and your significant other are planning a vacation, a dinner date, or a concert, be thankful you are in a relationship with a Make Sense. They can quickly come up with a game plan for travel, driving, hotel, put it in a spreadsheet and set it up quickly. The rest of us know this would’ve taken us weeks, 3 liters of tears, and 10 travel agent live chats to complete. But for a Make Sense they do their research, understand it, and map out what needs to happen – badda bing badda boom – done!
I think the most important thing to know when in a relationship with a Make Sense is that they can’t help themselves but try and help you. It is their way of nurturing the relationship, and they aren’t trying to make you feel less than when they’ve solved it before you were even done fully explaining the situation. You will be thankful for this ability many, many times over the course of your relationship. You will be thankful you have them to lean on and that they will do all the hard thinking for you. Make Sense people make a great life partners, taking down one obstacle at a time for the both of you.
4 replies on “So You’re In a Relationship With a Make Sense…”
As a Makes Sense, I can state that this has caused SO MUCH conflict for me. It is easy for me to see a solution to any problem, however I have learned that most people don’t want solutions, they want to be verified and legitimized. This is a huge struggle for me, as I am not very interested in people’s feeling but rather solutions to the problem at hand, period.
I have really made some serious efforts to quiet my mouth, open my ears and just listen before responding. Just a moment of two of silence, followed by a reflective listening statement (Boy, that must be difficult for you, I can see why you are so frustrated), and then listening some more, has helped tremendously. My main issue is that I am impatient, because I can see the solution and just want to move on to the next problem, but I now understand that others aren’t always wanting that.
Thank you! The Why Institute is incredibly helpful for me, and I plan to get as many people as I can to use it!
Thank you Steven! It is so good to know this about yourself to work through it like you have! Thank you for the great comment.
This is exactly what my love Eduardo is, you’ve given me a whole new perspective on our relationship!!!! Thank you very much!!!!!
So glad this was able to help you! Thank you for the great comment, Gema!